and if i'm dreaming then i'm dreaming of you
I'm feeling romantic... and hazily artistic.
As such, two Wire wallpapers.
Nothing particularly special, just Alex and Tony being their usual hopelessly-in-love selves.
( Read more... )
As such, two Wire wallpapers.
Nothing particularly special, just Alex and Tony being their usual hopelessly-in-love selves.
( Read more... )
I cannot argue with you and Tony. I get that look on my face whenever I look at Alex, Simone (or Helen.) You know, I keep debating. I know Tony loves Alex but I wonder if he realizes he's in love with her. Sometimes I think he does realize it and sometimes I think he's pretty clueless. Scenes like the jail cell in 6.02 and a ton of 6.04 make me think he was cluing in but I could also see him having these feelings for her and not realizing the weight of them until she really pushed the subject. I guess it makes sense that Alex would clue in first. I just spend way too much thinking about the timeline and who realized what when.
Ooh, soppily romantic drabble inducing plot bunny! If you must write more Tony/Alex fic to clear your head for your other Tony/Alex fic... Well, I for one totally support such a thing!
Reply
I know Tony loves Alex but I wonder if he realizes he's in love with her
OH YES THIS SO MUCH. This is precisely what I've been contemplating recently; I would go so far as to say Tony probably hasn't ever truly been 'in love' with any of the women he's dated, and as such he most likely isn't able to recognise the full weight and scope of how he feels about Alex. I agree that he has his moments, but most of the time I don't think he quite gets the magnitude of how he feels. I also tend to think that he was quite clued in early on - he knew he liked her (or had the potential to like her), hence the whole "I want to be with Carol. Or you", and also the way he got so hurt when Jonathon said he's "not the stuff her dreams are made of." But at that stage Alex herself hadn't come to terms with how she felt; she was only just beginning to see him as someone she could potentially love the pants right off of, and so when she (consciously or not) kinda shut him down, he managed to compartmentalise and kinda move on. He spends much of their time together assuming she's not interested that way, because that's how she was in the beginning (and because she's not very open to relationships at that stage), and so he misses the signs that she's actually falling herself. And, by the time she's caught up and had really realised how she feels, he's cavorting around town with Rachel, and she's sitting in bed all miserable. I always got the sense that Tony's hesitation with Rachel had a lot to do with Alex; here's this woman propositioning him, and he's stalling and uncertain, because he does want to be with Alex, and he's still holding out hope, even though he thinks she's not interested in that way. Which is why the interrogation cell scene and his explanation for being with Rachel is so significant. He's telling her, pretty much point-blank, "We were having a nice time. She's my friend. That's it." Albeit in his terribly confused way. And Alex still doesn't quite believe it, which is why she looks so godawful sad.
And now I've just seriously proven that I too spend far too much time contemplating their relationship. Who realised what and when is a fundamental obsession of mine. So we're on the same crazy train, thank goodness!
Drafting soppy drabble as we speak. It'll be kinda post-series; ie during Alex and Tony's exploration of the 'dinner and conversation' potential of their relationship. I warn you, it is looking really soppy. Lots of dorky!flirty!Tony, and lots of stricken-with-nerves!Alex. Which is always fun!
Reply
I think you're right. There's that season 3 episode where Carol says something about Tony never really loving anyone except maybe his parents and he doesn't really disagree. (Side note: I am so curious about Tony's family background/parents.) I can imagine him shoving his feelings away because he didn't know what to do with them and because, like you said, he's afraid his feelings would freak Alex out or that she would reciprocate.
I hated Jonathan so much but I also kind of loved that he made it undeniable that there were feelings there for him to mess with in the first place. I think, in the end, it might have been good for Tony and Alex to get a bit of a kick in the pants and realize how much they hated being at odds. And I also love the relatively easy way they made up after like they were just so relieved to have their fight over that neither one was going to hold onto any grudges.
Poor sad Alex during the Rachel thing. She does look so crushed when she calls and hears Tony and Rachel together but Tony does seem perfectly willing to give up his chance with Rachel in order to talk to Alex but Alex doesn't seem to get that. Good lord they are just one great big messy tangle of miscommunication and undeclared feelings, aren't they?
Anyway, I'm quite pleased to have you as my companion on this here crazy train.
And, your soppy dinner and conversation drabble sounds delightful. I cannot wait to read it!
Reply
4.02... such a great ep! It's really pretty amazing that this is only their second case together (in theory at least - I'm fairly certain they've done a whole lot of hanging out between 4.01 and 4.02), because they're so close by this stage! There's that little bit right at the very start, when Tony is talking to Alex about the case, he says something like, "You've been working on this for five weeks and you didn't mention it?" LIKE THEY JUST CHAT ALL THE TIME AND ARE SUCH GOOD FRIENDS ALREADY THAT ALEX WOULD TALK ABOUT ALL HER CASES WITH HIM. (Please excuse excessive use of caps, I'm excited!) And the 'shushing'! I love how she takes his plastic bag from him, and fixes his collar, all like it's just a normal occurence for her to be touching him, etc. They're so familiar with each other even at this early stage, it kills me.
Which leads me to the other most squeeworthy moment of 4.02: when DI Shields and Tony are discussing the killer's motivation, and Tony says the killer doesn't want to have sex with his victims and Shields replies 'Isn't that what all men want?' just as Alex and Tony share this inexplicable look! Gah! Which of course leaves Tony looking VERY confused, poor dear, but it's very sweet, because of course Tony doesn't just want to sleep with her, it's all much more complicated and lovely than that!
I do think Tony compartmentalised his feelings for Alex early on; I think he was in the very least attracted to her (he isn't blind or stupid, after all, right?) like Jonathon said, but that he interpreted a select instances of her behaviour as meaning she wasn't interested, and so he just kind of shrugged internally and went 'Oh well, I've still got her as my best friend, I should be happy with that', and let it go. Sort of. But then of course in 5.04 he has that moment of 'hang on!' when Jonathan says he's not the stuff her dreams are made on (I just love that line). He becomes rather more confident, as soon as he's realised something isn't right with the way Jonathan is talking about Alex (and their relationship). It's quite lovely to watch!
Oh, Alex looks devastated during the whole Rachel thing! Tony's reaction to her call was interesting, to say the least; you're right that he seems very ready to drop everything to talk to her, but at the same time the way he emphasises the 'that was Alex, from work' is really curious. It seems to me like he's at this stage still assuming she's not interested in him beyond friendship (even though in reality she's sitting in her bed in skimpy underwear and calling him at midnight...)
I could go on about this stuff for days, as you can probably tell.
I've not progessed much on my soppy drabble, but I've had another thought about a matching drabble to accompany it! Which is unfortunately the way my brain seems to work; too many crazy fic ideas at once. I do intend to write them both, however! I just need to wait for the soppily romantic mood to strike again!
Reply
I adore when she does thing like fixing his collar. It's just so sweet and, like you said, so natural to both of them. I love that Tony just stands there and lets her get his clothing all adjusted with no complaints kind of like he's just been waiting for her to do it. Not to jump ahead too much but I totally have this mental image of them getting married at some point in the future and Tony being at a total loss as two how to tie/adjust his tie and suit jacket because he's not allowed to see Alex before the wedding. (Yeah, my brain goes a little overboard and gets them married and engaged a lot. I think your mushy romanticness has worn off on me!)
Yeah, I think Tony is definitely willing to have Alex as his best friend only and not push it for anything more both because he thinks she's not interested and because he's not willing to lose her as a friend but I do love that he seems to start to think just maybe they could have something more and that it could be amazing and worth the risk.
I like your interpretation of the Tony/Rachel thing. It's almost like he's trying to remind/convince himself that Alex is just a friend and colleague even though she feels like so much more to him. Like he's trying to talk himself into the thing with Rachel because he thinks he's being a bit silly for being hung up on Alex.
even though in reality she's sitting in her bed in skimpy underwear and calling him at midnight...
Guhhh.... my brain...
I heart your crazy fic ideas!
Reply
EXACTLY! And meanwhile she's all cool as a cucumber, just gazing back at him before looking away, because at this stage the balance is in her favour - she likes him, but she's not in love with him yet, and so she's not freaking out internally (like he clearly is). But she's very much thinking, "Oh, this is weird, here's this man who thinks there's more to relationships than just sex, how curious and different from my prick ex-husband...*files away thought for later contemplation*". Gah, can you imagine if this scene had happened in season 6?? The blushing alone would kill me.
my brain goes a little overboard and gets them married and engaged a lot
OH MINE DOES TOO. Believe me, I think about this stuff all the time, I'm just a little hesitant to share because it's sickeningly romantic and cheesy and dorky... But seeing as we're in a fluffy, marshmallow-esque safe-haven, can't you just imagine Tony screwing up his tie before the wedding and Ben helping to fix it? TOO FREAKING CUTE.
Do you want to know exactly how overboard my brain goes? I've spent HOURS AT A TIME trying to think up the perfect words that Tony might use as a dedication for when his next book is published. Maybe something super fluffy like 'For Alex, who saved me', or perhaps something really vomit-inducing (but too lengthy) like 'For Alex. I do want to have dinner with you. I want to have dinner and dessert and breakfast the next morning with you. I want to have every meal I eat for the rest of my life with you.'.
YES I AM DISTURBED. And overwhelmed by my love for these two. And very sorry for infecting you with my mushiness.
he seems to start to think just maybe they could have something more
Oh, how I love this. I just love the sheer potential these two have; Alex seems to realise it first, and so she sets about pursuing him in a slow, steady, careful way, as if she just knows huge and epic it could be and is a little scared about potentially breaking something so precious. The two of them together just seems like such an opportunity; Tony's spent much of this life assuming real happiness and contentment are just not meant for him, and Alex thought she had found it before but was wrong, and then, by a little twist of fate and luck, they find each other. And suddenly anything's possible! It's poetic!
I definitely think Tony is trying to talk himself into hooking up with Rachel. The way he says "I could....", and the way he's so super-quick to answer his phone (so quick he smashes his glass up) are massive tells - I mean, I'm not that keen on Rachel in particular but if some quite gorgeous, intelligent, funny woman is throwing herself at me then answering my phone is not really up there on my list of priorities. Unless of course I'm madly, secretly in love with my beautiful hazel-eyed Scottish-accented best friend.
The underwear really is quite skimpy. Just sayin'.
Reply
I love this observation and the idea of Alex being surprised/delighted by all the little ways Tony expresses that he wants her for who she is and that he loves all these little things about her that aren't necessarily about their physical or romantic relationship. (Though obviously he will love that stuff too because it's Alex and Tony and this is porny, porny Bradfield after all.)
LOVE the idea of Ben helping Tony with his tie. I can just picture Ben telling Alex about it later and her just rolling her eyes in that 'Tony is such an adorable mess' kind of way.
ZOMG! Book dedications! Something new to obsess over! Hadn't even thought of that! I kind of like the simple and sweet "For Alex, who saved me." And, holy cow, can you imagine Alex's reaction when she first saw it? I am insanely excited by the idea. Alex would be all touched and maybe teary and Tony wouldn't realize how sweet it really was and would wonder why she was so overwhelmed.
Damnit! We are both disturbed and mushy and ridiculous!
Yes, yes. They are so filled with potential and opportunity and I think that both frightens and excites them both. I love that it seemed by the end they were both willing to go for it because they just couldn't stand not to anymore.
Yes, it would have to be someone I cared about an awful lot to get me to answer my phone if a hot woman was in the process of practically begging me to sex her up. There really was no other reason for Tony to answer the phone other than 1.) It's Alex and he's worried/concerned about her and 2.) It's Alex and she's the only one he really wants to be sexing up.
Damn you, woman! How am I meant to concentrate on anything else today if you keep bringing up Alex's skimpy underthings?
Reply
This is one thing I really love about them, really. I mean, that's real love, isn't it? When you adore all the other little things about the person as well as the obvious. And that's why I ADORE the tiny little moment when Alex quotes Nietzsche to him, and he just smiles so happily in response. It's gorgeous. And of course Tony is always doing odd little things which provoke a gooey grin from Alex. Exactly in that 'Tony is such an adorable mess' way.
Yeah, book dedications. That's how my mind works. I'm obsessed. There's a whole book-dedication drabble floating around in my head, waiting to be written (along with the thousand other unwritten drabbles). I can see Tony deciding to use a book dedication as a sort of sneaky, scaredy cat way of telling her how he feels, after they've been having a few of their 'dinner and conversation' nights, and sending an advance copy of the printed book to Alex, without actually saying a word about it. Alex would definitely get teary be overwhelmed, giving Tony an opportunity to do his dorky/sheepish/sexy/crinkly-eyed-grin thing. And then sexing. In the kitchen.
We're both verydisturbed and ridiculous, for sure. Whoever knew such a gory show could provoke such fluff in two usually reasonable, intelligent women?
by the end they were both willing to go for it
I freaking love 6.04 for this. Alex has come to terms with the adorably dorkish reality that she is in fact in love with him, and Tony is slowly getting his head around the idea that she likes him, and that they could actually work, and be great together. I love the little "she looked really nice" that he murmurs to himself - it's as if he hasn't really noticed how gorgeous she is for a while, and he's a little bit surprised that someone who is so gorgeous is interested in getting to know more about him molest him right there on the sushi train. All the potential is there, the whole thing is perfectly set up for season 7 to explore, and then.... *dies of frustration*
He really does go for that phone super-quick, doesn't he? And he's resisting Rachel in a pretty obvious way - so much so that she ends up looking a just a tiny bit desperate, poor woman. I agree on both points - he is concerned about her, and he does want to sex her and only her up. Actually, the first point reminds me of something that always bugged me - why didn't he call her back when he got back to his hotel room? Well, obviously because it would've ruined the plot, but still... Did he just pass straight out? Or did he assume because she was so quick to hang up that she didn't really want to talk to him that badly (Tony's lack of self-confidence coming through again)? Because if it's the latter, I really want to smack Tony upside the head. She called, you moron! Why would she call if she wasn't into you/desperate to talk to you whilst hanging about in this outfit?
She has good taste in underwear. And nice skin. That is all.
Reply
The Nietzsche moment is awesome and I can totally picture Tony being all excited and wanting to discuss Nietzsche later. Nerd love! It's so precious!
I am so in love with your book dedication idea and I hope you do write it someday. It sounds just adorable and lovely and all that mushy, romantic stuff we seem to enjoy despite being otherwise sane and intelligent women as you mentioned above. Also, kitchen sexing for the win! Every scenario involving Tony and Alex should somehow lead to kitchen sexing! There's not enough sex in that kitchen and that needs to be corrected immediately. Actually there's a ton of sex in that kitchen if you count eye sex.
Oh, Tony's muttering to himself about how pretty she looked on the way home is the best. My other favorite thing about the sushi (well, okay I just love everything) is how defensive Alex gets when Tony notes that she's wearing lipstick. I love that her first response is just a defensive, "So what?" Damn, they're adorable in all their awkwardness!
*joins you in your dramatic no season 7 death*
He's all about answering the phone! Definitely Alex related hesitation. Has to be! As for not calling her back, I'm going to go with him being a dope and assuming she really didn't want to talk to him that badly. And maybe the whole Rachel thing brought him to think about how much he really wanted Alex and he was being to emo and angsty and sad thinking she didn't want him in return to call back. After all, poor unfortunate Tony has no idea what skimpy, skimpy underwear Alex was wearing when she called.
Speaking of skimpy underwear Alex, *stares at your page some more*
Reply
Ah, so that's why I adore it, because it's Nerd Love! I really love the intellectual level of their relationship; which is why the 'smartest weirdo you'll meet' line is one of my absolute favourites! As the seasons progress you just see Alex gazing helplessly at him as he's pontificating; it's so obvious she loves and is completely turned on by his mind, and naturally he reciprocates. Which is the sexiest thing ever.
Pretty much all of my unwritten drabbles involve mushiness and/or kitchen sex. I don't know what it is about that set, but Alex's kitchen just seems like the perfect place for intensely hot porniness. It's that little table, the setting of all their past wine-nights and deep conversations, I suppose. And I don't mind the idea of a little make-out session on the stairs, either. I just really like Alex's house in general!
But yeah, that kitchen is no virgin space, if eyesex counts. Which is does.
I love the "So?!?" And the way she looks utterly freaked, and Tony looked both confused and nervous at once. They're so very awkward, but it's so fricking clear they both want it! I really think Alex just needs to take the matter in hand, so to speak, and just kiss him already.
Speaking of kissing, I can't help thinking the way Alex does all her tongue-smiling/pouting/lip-biting thing is a massive tell for her just wanting to desperately snog Tony all day long. It's like a Freudian thing, I figure. She's constantly staring at his mouth and biting her lip, as if she can't concentrate at all for all the pervy thoughts going through her head. It's hot.
If only Tony had've snapped out of his emo state! He's a brilliant psychologist - I'm absolutely certain he would've been quite capable of telling she was wearing the skimpiest of skimpies just by the tone of her voice over the phone! *begins plotting of phone sex drabble in mind*
Reply
I adore nerd love so much! On of my other recent ship loves bonded over a shared a love of literature and I just dug the nerdy element of their love affair. I guess I'm drawn to geek love. I really do love the fact that Tony and Alex both seem attracted to each other because they're both so freaking brilliant but in different ways. I think that's part of the attraction. They recognize each other's intelligence but are also really intrigued by the way the other's mind works because they are quite different in their approaches to things.
I adore the fact that you find Alex's kitchen so porny... and her stairs, and apparently her whole house. Really, I just like the way you think in general! I think it's just because any space Alex occupies for an extended period of time automatically picks up her extremely sexy vibes.
It cracks me up that we were on the same track with the explanation for the lip biting/tongue smiling/everything Alex does with her lips thing.
Yes! Surely if Tony had listened carefully he would have picked up on Alex's 'I'm wearing very skimpy, naughty underwear for you' tone and then they could have had phone sexy times and all that confusion could have been avoided.
Did you say phone sex drabble? *wide, excited eyes*
Reply
Nerd love is the only way to love. I tend to go for the 'too clever for their own good' characters and ships too. And I'm interested to know who your literature-ship is? Sounds like my kind of thing.
that's part of the attraction
Absolutely. You can just see it in the way Tony often looks surprised by her; as if he's always realising she's a cut above most other people he interacts with, intellectually speaking. Although there was that time when he corrected her grammar and although we didn't get to see the Helen-Stewart-Death-Glare in action, the tilt of the head tells me it was there. Don't take the risk, Dr Hill. Piss her off too much and she'll shove you right against that wall and do pervy things to you just to shut you up... Actually, I take that back. Do take the risk, Tony. Do it. Now.
Alex's house is really nice. I love the stained glass everywhere, the flowers, the excessive amounts of wine... She really does drink a lot of wine. Which for some reason I find extremely sexy. I've always had the notion that she and Tony are kind of amateur wine buffs together; bringing nice bottles of New Zealand Pinot Noir to each others' houses to drink whilst lazing about on the sofa and talking late into the night. I figure a trip to a vineyard or at the very least a wine-tasting store would be a perfect early-days date for the two of them. And that's a whole other unwritten fic. Damn.
He would've been able to tell she was wearing the lacy, transparent stuff. That's how he makes his living, right? And then the phone-sex could ensue. Although I have no fricking idea how to write phone sex. At all. Perhaps it's a skill I should master?
Oh, by the way, just so you know, I do have a habit of throwing random plot bunnies/unwritten drabble ideas in the air with alarming frequency. It's not like I'm ever going to possible write them all, so if you ever feel struck with the urge to adopt one, please do! I'm all about the sharing and caring. Especially when such sharing has the potential to generate WitB fic. Naturally.
Reply
I know you enjoy fierce women and Laura's fierce is particularly off the scale. I'm not entirely sure who would win if her and Alex were to have a fierce off. And, Laura's relationship with Adama has all the lovely angst and nerdiness and denial and push and pull and will they or won't they and 'this is totally inappropriate because of our jobs but I want to rip your clothes off anyway' tension that a gal could want.
If you don't mind a few minor spoilers before you watch (should you decide to) perhaps I can persuade you with a picspam o' Laura's presidential awesomeness? Okay, sorry, I got really excited. But BSG is one of my favorite shows ever and I just think there are a lot of elements of it that might suck you in given what little I know of your TV tastes!
Oh, man, you are just giving me all sorts of death glare mentions and excuses to use this icon tonight. Oh yes. Tony, please piss Alex off now if there is any chance that could mean shoved against the wall porniness. DO IT.
Awww. Wine date! That thought is entirely too happy inducing! They'd get all tipsy and giggly and gaze at each other even more longingly than they usually do. And Alex would get all blushy and Tony would stumble over his words. GAH!
Tony is a trained psychologist and would certainly pick up on Alex's 'I am wearing transparent, lacy garments' tone. Surely that tone is covered in Psych 101. Perhaps you should practice your phone sex writing skills, yes. You never know when you might need such skills and it is best to try now!
I might just take you up on adopting some of your plot bunnies one day. You do come up with some intriguing ones. If I do, I'll check with you first just to make sure it is not a bunny you are particularly possessive of. You are always welcome to my bunnies too though I know I don't have nearly as many as you do!
I admit, I need something to get me going fic-wise. I'm trying to finish an Alex/Paula story which has somehow turned into straight up porn. And, well, there's nothing wrong with straight up porn but I sort of meant for it to be more than that but my typing fingers they did not listen and they were just all, "porn, porn, porny ppppppoooorrrrnnnnn." Damn my fingers and their porny tendencies! (Somehow I think that sounds more dirty than I meant it to.)
Reply
You see, I have this weird thing. When I get interested in a new fandom, I feel horribly guilty about neglecting the characters in other fandoms I already love. Basically, I feel like an adulteress. Like I'm cheating on them.
Which is stupid.
But anyway, enough of my ridiculousness. I WILL WATCH BSG this year. It will happen. I owe it to myself, right?
I love your Glare of Doom icon! That's a very Simone thing too - she does it in 'Fallen', pretty much the whole way through. It's HOT.
That's true - I'm sure the capacity to write quality phone sex skills will come in handy in my future career. Is it okay to teach high school kids how to write PWP in English class? I really should get out the rules...
Please do feel free to snag any bunnies you like! I actually keep a diary of all my random fic ideas (yes, I am a D.O.R.K), and it's overflowing. I'm really lazy with writing itself, so I'm always, always overjoyed to see the randomness put to good use!
Um, Alex/Paula straight-up porn sounds pretty perfect to me. Would you like some inspiration? (Sorry, my PS is taking ages to open, otherwise I'd have cropped Tony out. But they still make a cute threesome, in my opinon. Look at that triangle of unfulfilled love!)
Reply
I totally understand needing to be ready for a new fandom especially if it is one you think you'll get really into. It took me several months after I finished BSG before I was ready to dive into something new completely and that something just happened to be WitB! Hello new obsession! Anyway, when and if you start BSG, please know that I would love for you to share any and all squee with me because it's one of those fandoms that I will always love even if I'm currently obsessed with something else and I would totally dig the excuse to go rewatch some episodes and squee along with you.
Hmmm... I'm not sure if you can teach PWP in high school English or not. Didn't they cover that in any of your classes? I would think there would be like a how to approach PWP in the classroom seminar or something!
Oooh, inspirational pic is inspirational! It's great that Paula is gazing longingly at Alex, Alex is gazing at Tony and Tony is gazing off into space.
I might just post the Alex/Paula thing as straight up porn because I have a really difficult time seeing them in anything relationshipy for some reason. I see them more as cure for a bad day at work sexy times buddies. Everyone needs one of those, right? I need to make some Paula and Alex/Paula icons one of these days! So many fun fandom things to distract myself from the homework I need to do this weekend...
Reply
Yep, I don't need no PowerPoint presentation to convince me. I know I need to watch BSG, I've known it a long time. I've prepared; I've bought the DVDs at least! And you can be your sweet ass I'll be hounding you day and night to squee with me incessantly over it once I do start watching!
They haven't covered how to teach PWP as yet in my course, no. Perhaps it's just a foolish oversight. I should email the course co-ordinator. Imagine the tragedy if such an important aspect in the skill of writing was overlooked!!
It's a microcosm of unrequited love, that pic. You're so right - Paula's gazing at Alex, Alex is gazing at Tony, and Tony is gazing off, completely oblivious and innocent. Says it all, really. Plus all three of them are just so damn attractive.
I see them more as cure for a bad day at work sexy times buddies
Yep! That's the direction I'd take them, too. It just fits. A really horrible case, a darkened corridor outside the interrogation rooms, lots of frustration and pent-up emotion... Pretty much writes itself, huh?
Oooh, Alex/Paula icons! Sounds lovely. I've always wanted an icon of Paula eating the cookie while they're doing their stakeout in 6.02, personally - that moment when she's taken a bite and is holding the cookie in her hand and looking sideways at Alex and Tony with the most priceless "WTF, why do I have to deal with these UST-tortured fruitloops?" So, if you're up for taking requests... *pretty please face in the style of Tony asking to stay over at Alex's in 6.01*
Reply
Leave a comment