more, more, more
And the third bit, Terry biting the bullet and telling his parents..and Nan.
um 'Pansy' is a term nicked from my g.aunt (in her 90's, catholic upbringing), her response to the very subtle worded awkward announcement that someone we knew was moving in with another guy - 'I always thought he was a Pansy' I'm still not 100% sure of her definition of gay but I'm afraid to delve!
Fists were about to fly. Some chat show was in full swing, a larger than life woman blubbering all over the place while her skinny runt of a partner looked on cold. The audience were whipped to a frenzy and braying for blood like a pack of angry hounds, while the host simpered and oozed fake sympathy. The big screen flashed a picture of cute children, all pretty and pastel beaming innocence. The crowd cooed, the mother wept, the partner mouthed off and huge bouncers invaded the stage.
Terry’s mother muttered under her breath and leaned closer to the screen, his father shook his paper but winked at Terry before hiding behind it. His Nan, and he’d not thought of her being here, was asking what had happened, a hand behind a ear though they were both one as impaired as the other. She tutted her disapproval regardless.
‘Mom, dad. I need to speak to you’
‘What you done now son, tell me it’s not Mr Hubberd glass house windows again.’
‘Dad, that was years ago!’
‘The man still gives me the evil eye every time I walk past.’
‘You pregnant?’
‘Mum?!’
‘I’d make a good granny wouldn’t mind a little girl to spoil’
‘What’s that?’
‘Terry says he needs to speak to us’
‘He needs what?’
‘To speak’
‘What’s he normally do then, enough noise those boys make. Speak, huh grunt is all these teenagers do today.’
‘What is it love, someone picking on you? Your grades are good’
‘No, yes’
‘You’re getting picked on? Paul’s not said anything, thought you got on okay, got that bunch of lads you hang out with, getting up to mischief and braking window panes all the time’
‘One time dad. I was seven’
‘Seven of them he say? Bop them on the nose you should. Get the ringleader and the others will scatter you mark my word love’
‘Mum I don’t think that’s it’
‘What’s that dear?’
‘No Nan, I’m not bullied’
‘You’re not. Then why did you say so. Seven of them you said’
‘It’s not that. Mum?’ His mother nodded reassuringly, managed to explain away the none-existing bullies to his disgruntled Nan then looked at him expectantly. For a moment he wished he got bullied.
‘Mum, dad, er Nan.’ deep breath ‘I’m gay’
‘What he say?’ The floor didn’t swallow him up, the windows didn’t explode, no one was screaming. Apocalypse later?
‘He said he’s gay’
‘Gay. Gay? Looks rather miserable to me dear, are you sure?’
‘Yes, I’m sure’
‘If you say so love. Don’t know why’d you have to say it though, getting to the good bit on the telly to. That hairy dude was going to bop the other one I’d swear to it. In my day people smiled when they were gay, not looked about to cry.’ She was well meaning if a tad loopy and sounded concerned as she rambled on.
‘Mum that’s not the type of gay he means’
‘There’s more than one type now? How gay can a person be?’
‘No mum he means he likes other boys’
‘Well I should hope so, not good if he’s a bully’
‘No he likes boys as, well like Lily Waters at the posties son does. He’s living with that hairdresser on Bowers street now.’
‘Terrance wants to live with a hairdresser?’
‘No mum, Terry says he likes boys not girls’
‘Oh you mean he’s a pansy! Why didn’t you say that in the first place, all this waffle about hairdressers. Does a nice trim he does mind you even if he does wear those silky shirts and talk all posh. Yes, don’t you be turning your nose up at hairdressers my boy, you could do a lot worse.’
Terry stood frozen in the living room. His feet had welded themselves to the laminate, his brain was slowly leaking out his ears while his mouth opened and closed like a goldfish. His father was yet to say a word, he’d folded up the newspaper with precision almost like he feared an inspection. Those folds were razor neat. The pages were smoothed out, and the paper placed carefully on the coffee table. And the audience brayed.
Terry’s mother turned the tv off, the click sounding overloud in the room and the resulting silence echoing horribly grating delicate senses. His Nan tutted but managed not to comment just peering at Terry as though at a new and fascinating form of life. His father was yet to speak, but cleared his throat ready.
‘You’re gay then’ His matter of fact tone gave nothing away and Terry’s heart sank to his knees and shook there.
‘Yes dad’ Was he still allowed to call him dad? This man who’d taught him to ride a bike, kicked ball with, and who’d laughed (then paid) when the neighbours greenhouse windows had smashed. Three of them and one chipped.
‘This mean you’re not going to study maths?’
‘What?’
‘Well you going to be a hairdresser now?’
‘No!’
‘That’s okay then’ a look at Terry’s styled perfection ‘We’d all be running around like
Hedgehogs’
‘um’
‘Jeff! He’s upset don’t tease. He’s teasing you love’
‘He is?’ did he know these people? Where were the explosions?
‘Oh come and sit down honey you look about to fall.’ his mother patted the stool beside her and held her arms out. Terry would deny it vehemently to his peers but, he did not spurn the hug.
‘Mum?’
‘Oh silly boy, you’re shaking. Tell him you’re teasing Jeff’
‘I’m teasing you son, ‘course I am.’ His father’s voice was gruff and he’d called him son which could only be good.
‘Silly boy, we already knew. We’ve been waiting for you to be ready to tell us.’
‘But…?’ Wow, he must be really flaming!
‘I clean your room love!’ she was being subtle with her pursed lips and raised brow but Terry was clueless, he was getting that feeling a lot today.
‘Under the bed?!’ Okay he got it. A blush burst out of his cheeks and he felt his ears start to glow. He kept his magazine stash under the bed. They weren’t anything bad, it’s not like he’d ever dare to buy porn or anything but he also knew they fell open at certain pages now. Thankfully he had the sense to flush the tissues!
‘Your dad and I had a little word with Lily last year, she’s runs the local PFLAG meetings. There’s some lovely people there if you ever want to talk.’
‘Your mother was quite taken with the setup, was baking cakes all week when they did that march, you remember?’ Terry did. He’d not thought about it at the time but his mother had gone into a frenzy and they’d all had to help her load the car when she’d gone to deliver them to the hall.
‘If you didn’t out yourself soon I feared she’d do it for you so she’s an excuse to go to the meetings’
‘Don’t be silly Jeff. Oh, we’ll have to go this Friday, I’ll bake some Cookies.’
‘There son, you’ve made your mother proud’ His father winked at him. Thinks were not going as Terry had envisioned.
‘Shut-up you. Terry love, I’ve always been proud of you. Well, maybe not when you called Aunty Hilda a nosey old dinosaur at your Nan’s birthday party that year. But we love you honey and we’ll always be proud. Just understand if we keep you away from Aunty Hilda. She bought me that vase next time she called, I’m convinced it was punishment’ They all stared at the vase in the corner and shuddered.
‘’Course we’re proud. Right then’ a throat clearing ‘whose for Coffee then?’
Terry smiled at his parents. They embarrass you sometimes but he’d not change them for the world.
‘Oi wait until I tell Maggie at the guild, she’s not got a pansy in the family she’ll be ever so jealous!’
‘Nan!’
‘Well, her youngests kid dyed her hair green and ran around with a band for awhile but this trumps her good. I’ll be the envy of the gossip-pots’
Family. Sometimes he wished they were sane but he’d not change them! Terry punched Paul in the shoulder after his brother pushed him off his perch muttering pansy under his breath, he’d clearly been lurking.
um 'Pansy' is a term nicked from my g.aunt (in her 90's, catholic upbringing), her response to the very subtle worded awkward announcement that someone we knew was moving in with another guy - 'I always thought he was a Pansy' I'm still not 100% sure of her definition of gay but I'm afraid to delve!
Fists were about to fly. Some chat show was in full swing, a larger than life woman blubbering all over the place while her skinny runt of a partner looked on cold. The audience were whipped to a frenzy and braying for blood like a pack of angry hounds, while the host simpered and oozed fake sympathy. The big screen flashed a picture of cute children, all pretty and pastel beaming innocence. The crowd cooed, the mother wept, the partner mouthed off and huge bouncers invaded the stage.
Terry’s mother muttered under her breath and leaned closer to the screen, his father shook his paper but winked at Terry before hiding behind it. His Nan, and he’d not thought of her being here, was asking what had happened, a hand behind a ear though they were both one as impaired as the other. She tutted her disapproval regardless.
‘Mom, dad. I need to speak to you’
‘What you done now son, tell me it’s not Mr Hubberd glass house windows again.’
‘Dad, that was years ago!’
‘The man still gives me the evil eye every time I walk past.’
‘You pregnant?’
‘Mum?!’
‘I’d make a good granny wouldn’t mind a little girl to spoil’
‘What’s that?’
‘Terry says he needs to speak to us’
‘He needs what?’
‘To speak’
‘What’s he normally do then, enough noise those boys make. Speak, huh grunt is all these teenagers do today.’
‘What is it love, someone picking on you? Your grades are good’
‘No, yes’
‘You’re getting picked on? Paul’s not said anything, thought you got on okay, got that bunch of lads you hang out with, getting up to mischief and braking window panes all the time’
‘One time dad. I was seven’
‘Seven of them he say? Bop them on the nose you should. Get the ringleader and the others will scatter you mark my word love’
‘Mum I don’t think that’s it’
‘What’s that dear?’
‘No Nan, I’m not bullied’
‘You’re not. Then why did you say so. Seven of them you said’
‘It’s not that. Mum?’ His mother nodded reassuringly, managed to explain away the none-existing bullies to his disgruntled Nan then looked at him expectantly. For a moment he wished he got bullied.
‘Mum, dad, er Nan.’ deep breath ‘I’m gay’
‘What he say?’ The floor didn’t swallow him up, the windows didn’t explode, no one was screaming. Apocalypse later?
‘He said he’s gay’
‘Gay. Gay? Looks rather miserable to me dear, are you sure?’
‘Yes, I’m sure’
‘If you say so love. Don’t know why’d you have to say it though, getting to the good bit on the telly to. That hairy dude was going to bop the other one I’d swear to it. In my day people smiled when they were gay, not looked about to cry.’ She was well meaning if a tad loopy and sounded concerned as she rambled on.
‘Mum that’s not the type of gay he means’
‘There’s more than one type now? How gay can a person be?’
‘No mum he means he likes other boys’
‘Well I should hope so, not good if he’s a bully’
‘No he likes boys as, well like Lily Waters at the posties son does. He’s living with that hairdresser on Bowers street now.’
‘Terrance wants to live with a hairdresser?’
‘No mum, Terry says he likes boys not girls’
‘Oh you mean he’s a pansy! Why didn’t you say that in the first place, all this waffle about hairdressers. Does a nice trim he does mind you even if he does wear those silky shirts and talk all posh. Yes, don’t you be turning your nose up at hairdressers my boy, you could do a lot worse.’
Terry stood frozen in the living room. His feet had welded themselves to the laminate, his brain was slowly leaking out his ears while his mouth opened and closed like a goldfish. His father was yet to say a word, he’d folded up the newspaper with precision almost like he feared an inspection. Those folds were razor neat. The pages were smoothed out, and the paper placed carefully on the coffee table. And the audience brayed.
Terry’s mother turned the tv off, the click sounding overloud in the room and the resulting silence echoing horribly grating delicate senses. His Nan tutted but managed not to comment just peering at Terry as though at a new and fascinating form of life. His father was yet to speak, but cleared his throat ready.
‘You’re gay then’ His matter of fact tone gave nothing away and Terry’s heart sank to his knees and shook there.
‘Yes dad’ Was he still allowed to call him dad? This man who’d taught him to ride a bike, kicked ball with, and who’d laughed (then paid) when the neighbours greenhouse windows had smashed. Three of them and one chipped.
‘This mean you’re not going to study maths?’
‘What?’
‘Well you going to be a hairdresser now?’
‘No!’
‘That’s okay then’ a look at Terry’s styled perfection ‘We’d all be running around like
Hedgehogs’
‘um’
‘Jeff! He’s upset don’t tease. He’s teasing you love’
‘He is?’ did he know these people? Where were the explosions?
‘Oh come and sit down honey you look about to fall.’ his mother patted the stool beside her and held her arms out. Terry would deny it vehemently to his peers but, he did not spurn the hug.
‘Mum?’
‘Oh silly boy, you’re shaking. Tell him you’re teasing Jeff’
‘I’m teasing you son, ‘course I am.’ His father’s voice was gruff and he’d called him son which could only be good.
‘Silly boy, we already knew. We’ve been waiting for you to be ready to tell us.’
‘But…?’ Wow, he must be really flaming!
‘I clean your room love!’ she was being subtle with her pursed lips and raised brow but Terry was clueless, he was getting that feeling a lot today.
‘Under the bed?!’ Okay he got it. A blush burst out of his cheeks and he felt his ears start to glow. He kept his magazine stash under the bed. They weren’t anything bad, it’s not like he’d ever dare to buy porn or anything but he also knew they fell open at certain pages now. Thankfully he had the sense to flush the tissues!
‘Your dad and I had a little word with Lily last year, she’s runs the local PFLAG meetings. There’s some lovely people there if you ever want to talk.’
‘Your mother was quite taken with the setup, was baking cakes all week when they did that march, you remember?’ Terry did. He’d not thought about it at the time but his mother had gone into a frenzy and they’d all had to help her load the car when she’d gone to deliver them to the hall.
‘If you didn’t out yourself soon I feared she’d do it for you so she’s an excuse to go to the meetings’
‘Don’t be silly Jeff. Oh, we’ll have to go this Friday, I’ll bake some Cookies.’
‘There son, you’ve made your mother proud’ His father winked at him. Thinks were not going as Terry had envisioned.
‘Shut-up you. Terry love, I’ve always been proud of you. Well, maybe not when you called Aunty Hilda a nosey old dinosaur at your Nan’s birthday party that year. But we love you honey and we’ll always be proud. Just understand if we keep you away from Aunty Hilda. She bought me that vase next time she called, I’m convinced it was punishment’ They all stared at the vase in the corner and shuddered.
‘’Course we’re proud. Right then’ a throat clearing ‘whose for Coffee then?’
Terry smiled at his parents. They embarrass you sometimes but he’d not change them for the world.
‘Oi wait until I tell Maggie at the guild, she’s not got a pansy in the family she’ll be ever so jealous!’
‘Nan!’
‘Well, her youngests kid dyed her hair green and ran around with a band for awhile but this trumps her good. I’ll be the envy of the gossip-pots’
Family. Sometimes he wished they were sane but he’d not change them! Terry punched Paul in the shoulder after his brother pushed him off his perch muttering pansy under his breath, he’d clearly been lurking.