~14 Drills
Tuesday was uneventful for the most part. I tried to get a hold of my apartment manager. Several people have started responding to my Craiglist post, and the pictures seem to be hooking them in. It is indeed a hot property. My parents have my social security card and passport, so I had to go by the social security office for a form that proves I'm an American. The line was hella long and I got sick of waiting so I left, that was probably a mistake.
~Click here for Wallpaper~
Today I found out that my phone has been disconnected. It freaked me out like nothing else! Nothing like that has ever happened to any phone I’ve ever had so I assumed the worst. I ran to the bank and moved all my money out of the current joint bank account and to a personal one just for me. To make sure I had some money coming in I went back to the KBTX news station and asked if I could work there this summer. I had people with phones I could mooch come over and I called my family to make sure I wasn’t going to be arrested for grand theft auto while driving around or something. Apparently the phone thing turned out to be a freak accident. I feel a little stupid about jumping to conclusions, but given the context of how rocky my relationship with my parents has gotten I can still understand why I made that jump. In any event I was proud to say that with that money I had, I felt I was completely capable of making it on my own.
After the scare washed over I talked to my mom on the phone briefly. My parents really aren't the kind of people to disown their kids like that, I’ve been so stressed and on edge lately that I’m not thinking clearly. This whole experience was more than a little jarring, even if I could have made it on my own it wouldn’t have been easy and I would have most likely lost any opportunity to go to school in the fall, and even if I pulled it off I would have never been able to take any animation classes (something I want to at least dip into). If I had started making such messy cuts with my family any home life I still enjoy (and hope to enjoy someday) would be thrown out the window. However, I think still my original (coherent) line of thought was correct. My parents are not in a good place and blame me for it. They don’t accept the idea that I’m gay on any level and it’s still causing increasing damage to our relationship. If I leave things as they are there's no chance that they'll get any better any time soon. Separating myself from them this summer in a way that is calm, respectful, and without any sort of malice will do a lot for all of us. If I keep a job or two and continue to network friends, then they’ll have a much harder time discounting me as antisocial, lonely, and lost. If I’m supporting myself and not relying on them for money, then I’ll have a level field on which to reestablish a relationship with my parents.
I’d say that being independent for the summer remains the best possible plan for pretty much every aspect of my life right now, although I guess today proved that I’ve gotten a little side tracked and carried away. I've reinvented my plan for the summer. Its to accept my monthly allowance for rent and bills this month with the intent on paying it back to my parents like a loan. Then for every subsequent month until school starts I’ll completely support myself. That plan isn't drastic or overly dramatic and still lets me accomplish everything I need to. It makes the most sense.
~Click here for Wallpaper~
Today I found out that my phone has been disconnected. It freaked me out like nothing else! Nothing like that has ever happened to any phone I’ve ever had so I assumed the worst. I ran to the bank and moved all my money out of the current joint bank account and to a personal one just for me. To make sure I had some money coming in I went back to the KBTX news station and asked if I could work there this summer. I had people with phones I could mooch come over and I called my family to make sure I wasn’t going to be arrested for grand theft auto while driving around or something. Apparently the phone thing turned out to be a freak accident. I feel a little stupid about jumping to conclusions, but given the context of how rocky my relationship with my parents has gotten I can still understand why I made that jump. In any event I was proud to say that with that money I had, I felt I was completely capable of making it on my own.
After the scare washed over I talked to my mom on the phone briefly. My parents really aren't the kind of people to disown their kids like that, I’ve been so stressed and on edge lately that I’m not thinking clearly. This whole experience was more than a little jarring, even if I could have made it on my own it wouldn’t have been easy and I would have most likely lost any opportunity to go to school in the fall, and even if I pulled it off I would have never been able to take any animation classes (something I want to at least dip into). If I had started making such messy cuts with my family any home life I still enjoy (and hope to enjoy someday) would be thrown out the window. However, I think still my original (coherent) line of thought was correct. My parents are not in a good place and blame me for it. They don’t accept the idea that I’m gay on any level and it’s still causing increasing damage to our relationship. If I leave things as they are there's no chance that they'll get any better any time soon. Separating myself from them this summer in a way that is calm, respectful, and without any sort of malice will do a lot for all of us. If I keep a job or two and continue to network friends, then they’ll have a much harder time discounting me as antisocial, lonely, and lost. If I’m supporting myself and not relying on them for money, then I’ll have a level field on which to reestablish a relationship with my parents.
I’d say that being independent for the summer remains the best possible plan for pretty much every aspect of my life right now, although I guess today proved that I’ve gotten a little side tracked and carried away. I've reinvented my plan for the summer. Its to accept my monthly allowance for rent and bills this month with the intent on paying it back to my parents like a loan. Then for every subsequent month until school starts I’ll completely support myself. That plan isn't drastic or overly dramatic and still lets me accomplish everything I need to. It makes the most sense.