Curves
My mom has a friend that really likes to go to Curves, and for a while my mom went with her just to keep her company so the woman could get into the habit of going (as everyone knows, gym-going is easier with a buddy). My mom didn't like it, didn't like the format, or the atmosphere, and as soon as her friend got the habit established, she went back to her regular gym. Now I learn that Curves is the product of a Jesus-freak and apparently structured like a bizarro Stepford gym or something:
Typically, the complete body workout takes place on 10 machines, withexercisers moving every 30 seconds, followed by 30-second aerobicrecovery. The workout is accompanied by rhythmic music and a recordedvoice that intermittently instructs the women to "change stations now."
Frea-kay, mm?
Then there's stuff like this:
Soon after working out at Curves, Buchanan became a part-time employee there, too.
"It's the first job I've ever worked where I can tell people I'm praying for them," Buchanan says.
I imagine that having gym employees tell my mother that they were praying her her was a large part of why she disliked the place so much. Just maybe.
The franchise founders give a lot to charity, which would be good, except:
In 2003, the couple gave away $10 million-10 percent of their company'sgross revenues and 80 percent of Gary's net income-to charities. Heavinmatches the first $1,000 that each franchise raises for communitycauses such as walkathons to benefit pro-life pregnancy-care centers.
That's right; Curves is getting women back into prime babymaking shape and also funding agendas that will make sure that they have those babies, goddamit.
And finally:
"I'm not an athletic person," says Hickman, who is a foster-parenttrainer. "I would never go to the Y(oung)M(ens)C(HRISTIAN)A(ssociation) because of the coed aspect."
OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD, menz and wimminz exercising together! Dens of iniquity! Houses of sin! SODOM AND GOMORRAH!
Yeah. Curves seems by parts to be both freaky deaky and evil.
Typically, the complete body workout takes place on 10 machines, withexercisers moving every 30 seconds, followed by 30-second aerobicrecovery. The workout is accompanied by rhythmic music and a recordedvoice that intermittently instructs the women to "change stations now."
Frea-kay, mm?
Then there's stuff like this:
Soon after working out at Curves, Buchanan became a part-time employee there, too.
"It's the first job I've ever worked where I can tell people I'm praying for them," Buchanan says.
I imagine that having gym employees tell my mother that they were praying her her was a large part of why she disliked the place so much. Just maybe.
The franchise founders give a lot to charity, which would be good, except:
In 2003, the couple gave away $10 million-10 percent of their company'sgross revenues and 80 percent of Gary's net income-to charities. Heavinmatches the first $1,000 that each franchise raises for communitycauses such as walkathons to benefit pro-life pregnancy-care centers.
That's right; Curves is getting women back into prime babymaking shape and also funding agendas that will make sure that they have those babies, goddamit.
And finally:
"I'm not an athletic person," says Hickman, who is a foster-parenttrainer. "I would never go to the Y(oung)M(ens)C(HRISTIAN)A(ssociation) because of the coed aspect."
OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD, menz and wimminz exercising together! Dens of iniquity! Houses of sin! SODOM AND GOMORRAH!
Yeah. Curves seems by parts to be both freaky deaky and evil.