~fucked up news report~
ok well i just watched the news while i was trying to sleep it usualy helps , but one report really pissed me off , a teacher at a highschool that teaches "special ed" students also known as e.s.e. , i was one before high school , is being sued , ok now what hes being sued for might sound reasonable to many of you who dont understand it but i understand his reasoning well , he made an ese student hold a sign that said along the lines of , look at me im stupid no diploma etc etc , now i know it sounds bad , but the point he was trying to put across was , theese kids go to school , many of them take all the required classes , and yet theyre not allowed to get a diploma , they get a paper that says i went to school for 4 years and got absofuckingloutly nothing but this paper to show for it , and they do the same work and tests that any normal student gets. they might get some extra time to complete it but most of them dont need it , as i laid down and let this build up and agitate me more, theese kids put up with 10 times the shit we do and most of them have what to look forward to , being treated with a label that theyll most likely never acomplish something or be let the chance to even try , seriously fuck anyone who doughts theese people , some of them are twice as smart as anyone i know and theyre never going to have a high school diploma or higher because they were born with something they couldnt help , and ive dealt with ese kids all my life from challenger baseball team where i met one of my best freinds tommy mackell who i miss dearly , to even learning more about my brother and his problems , i feel like shit for even feeling the litlest bit deresed wih my life because i really have nothing to complain or be sad about ive had some great times theese last 2 months and of course i have my regrets and hurt but it really feels like nothing now. ok i could type about this all night but i think im gona go run a bit so maybee i can sleep, for all of you who actualy read this or give a shit , i love you , i really do and you are the people i live forthe people who live not just for yourself but for others , and i hope to keep you all around me forever. jon shea out , ~take care