Sleepy Time
Its 4:44 AM as I start to write this, I’m sitting in the tub, and you m’dear have retired to your futon -not your bed, I didn’t have time to ask why- for dreams. I hope your dreams are sweet, remember them when you wake or not. I want to be able to make your sleeping life as wonderful as you tell me I make your waking life. I’m listening to ‘The Cure’ right now; I think you know what song too.
Every day with you, whether it be spent with you physically or talking to you on the phone, brings new and good surprises. Even if it’s something we’ve said before, sometimes it comes renewed with a new intensity, a finalization to it sort of. Like the last thing we talked about before I spun off into crazy rambling about my Grandfather.
Eventually at the end of our lifetime, we’ll stand before each other, completely nude, exposed fully and I have no fear, only full confidence that we’ll both accept the other for what they are. Right down to the bare nakedness of it.
Both agreeing that mystery is a thing that helps relationships thrive, we spoke of week long vacations, separate at the same time, letting each other grow as that’s important. As to not run out of things, but also not forgetting that as much as we don’t like our pasts there’s no escaping it. And as we expose ourselves more and more, bringing up new things from the old day’s… letting on to the other, letting them understand, we continue the mystery.
Is it possible to completely know someone with out knowing their entire past; is the past really that important? Part of me would like to completely discard that aspect of myself, and you even, because like you said, certain things about it, like us being with other people, is hard to handle. It finds a nerve and dances on it, those thoughts, but it’s not really something we can ignore. Instead what we can give to it is that we are now, and we are all there is to now.
I enjoy discussing thing’s with you, all things even if they are sad things because it’s sharing. I’ll have to admit I enjoy discussing our future much more than our separate pasts and not just because our pasts weren’t too great, but because they were without each other.
Given however everyday that we stay together, adds to our past together. But that isn’t the one we’re revealing to each other. It’s more the current, it is funny however how long ago the first day we met was, and it’s hardly been… Well I don’t like time, it really does seem inaccurate, I almost wonder if it is, if we’ve advanced beyond it.
I meant that promise I made, but you know that in the fact that I made it to begin with. I hope that helps to show you how serious I am.
Thinking of you again, curled up in my Grandfathers blanket on your futon, sleeping, dreaming. I hope you fell asleep instantly after we hung up. I feel guilty that I didn’t but I wanted to document the day before it escaped to unconsciousness. Who knows what detail sleep could erase.
However I am getting rather sleepy now, the music with the warm water and thought’s of you. I wish more than anything right now that I could be laying in that blanket with you, sleeping next to you.
I’m going to clean up, and go post this, then I’m going to crawl in bed and close my eyes and as I drift off into a dream land, I’ll imagine myself, in your arms where I belong, under that blanket. With you.
I love you so much, Eric.
Every day with you, whether it be spent with you physically or talking to you on the phone, brings new and good surprises. Even if it’s something we’ve said before, sometimes it comes renewed with a new intensity, a finalization to it sort of. Like the last thing we talked about before I spun off into crazy rambling about my Grandfather.
Eventually at the end of our lifetime, we’ll stand before each other, completely nude, exposed fully and I have no fear, only full confidence that we’ll both accept the other for what they are. Right down to the bare nakedness of it.
Both agreeing that mystery is a thing that helps relationships thrive, we spoke of week long vacations, separate at the same time, letting each other grow as that’s important. As to not run out of things, but also not forgetting that as much as we don’t like our pasts there’s no escaping it. And as we expose ourselves more and more, bringing up new things from the old day’s… letting on to the other, letting them understand, we continue the mystery.
Is it possible to completely know someone with out knowing their entire past; is the past really that important? Part of me would like to completely discard that aspect of myself, and you even, because like you said, certain things about it, like us being with other people, is hard to handle. It finds a nerve and dances on it, those thoughts, but it’s not really something we can ignore. Instead what we can give to it is that we are now, and we are all there is to now.
I enjoy discussing thing’s with you, all things even if they are sad things because it’s sharing. I’ll have to admit I enjoy discussing our future much more than our separate pasts and not just because our pasts weren’t too great, but because they were without each other.
Given however everyday that we stay together, adds to our past together. But that isn’t the one we’re revealing to each other. It’s more the current, it is funny however how long ago the first day we met was, and it’s hardly been… Well I don’t like time, it really does seem inaccurate, I almost wonder if it is, if we’ve advanced beyond it.
I meant that promise I made, but you know that in the fact that I made it to begin with. I hope that helps to show you how serious I am.
Thinking of you again, curled up in my Grandfathers blanket on your futon, sleeping, dreaming. I hope you fell asleep instantly after we hung up. I feel guilty that I didn’t but I wanted to document the day before it escaped to unconsciousness. Who knows what detail sleep could erase.
However I am getting rather sleepy now, the music with the warm water and thought’s of you. I wish more than anything right now that I could be laying in that blanket with you, sleeping next to you.
I’m going to clean up, and go post this, then I’m going to crawl in bed and close my eyes and as I drift off into a dream land, I’ll imagine myself, in your arms where I belong, under that blanket. With you.
I love you so much, Eric.