I don't know what kind of life I've led today.

[meaninglesslove]

It seems like updating has become a monthly thing.
But reasons to always come up in this manner.
Ever have a big regret, and not realize it until
months have passed? And then it kinda haunts you
for ahwile and you try to ignore it, but you can't,
even in your sleep because you keep DREAMING about
it.
I tried and I tried to try to help the situation.
Like even talking or being friends would make this all
go away, but it's still on my mind. And maybe if I
could just go back in time and fix something I
said or maybe how I said it, everything would be
the same and all this wouldn't be going on.
It just hurts to know that I can't even try anymore.
It's completely out of my reach now.
Can it haunt me forever though, I just don't know.
I wonder if they feel the same or if they just think
I'm an idiot for being like this.
I try to push it off like it's all nothing, but it just
won't go away. I tell myself over and over to stop
pursuing, but my mind refuses to let me.
Why did it all come to this, this constant mess in
my head? Someone please tell me what to do, because
I give up.
Maybe I'm over tired,
or maybe I'll never get over this.