Where to start (3/?)
A/N: Well that was one... shit! I hate this chapter. It took me too long to write it! Ok... I like one part of it and that's all (Erica/Kevin conversation).
Thanks you Patricia for editing! :D
Chapter 3:
„Excuse me, can you tell me where I can find Dr Hahn?” Laura asked one of the nurses standing near the exam room.
“Yes. Down the hall, make a left; it’s the second door on the right.” The woman answered.
“Thank you.” Laura nodded and walked away.
When she found Erica’s office she heard voices inside, so she decided to wait. A few minutes later, a young resident left the office, and Laura knocked quietly and walked into the room.
“Hi! Can we talk?” She started right away.
“What…? How...?” Erica looked at the younger woman, surprised.
“Erica, why didn’t you call me?”
“I was busy.” She replied quickly.
“It’s been a week. You didn’t have the time to call me or send me a text? A week, Erica!” Laura crossed her arms.
“Look! I don’t know what you are thinking, but we are not together. We are not a couple. And what’s more important, I don’t have to explain myself to you! I wouldn’t have to, even if we were a couple.” Erica said irritated. “Now excuse me. I have to go.”
Erica made her way through the doors and stopped when she passed Laura.
“I’m sorry.” Erica sighed. “I should have called you. I just… I didn’t know what to say to you.” She moved her gaze towards Laura.
”Do you want to go somewhere with me tonight?” Laura smiled wickedly.
Erica laughed quietly. “Where is this somewhere?”
“Let me just say that it’s over the rainbow.” She winked at Erica.
“Please don’t do that.”
“Do what?”
“Don’t wink at me. I’m not a school girl.”
“Umm… after that night I think you are…” She paused, seeing Erica’s look. “But only a little.” She grinned and winked again.
Erica shook her head and they both left her office.
“What time does your shift end?”
“8:30.”
“Great. I’ll come to pick you up.” She moved closer to Erica and whispered in her ear. “By the way, you look incredibly sexy in those scrubs.”
Erica could feel the other woman’s warm breath against her ear. She took a step backwards.
“You do know that that’s not working with me, do you?” The older woman asked seriously, but Laura seemed not to notice that.
“We will see!” She turned around and started to walk towards the exit. “I’ll be waiting for you at 8:30, Dr Hahn.” She added a few seconds later.
Two hours later Erica was in the X-ray room, looking at her patient’s films. She liked coming there. It was always quiet and empty. Most of the time, no one was using that room. Until now.
“Hey, I thought I might find you in here.” Kevin said, sitting in the chair next to Erica.
She just nodded and concentrated on the films again.
“I saw Laura earlier. She said that you two are going out tonight.” He shifted on his chair. “I’m glad you two like each other.”
Finally Erica looked at him but didn’t say anything.
“I’m glad she finally found someone like you. I mean, she only has male friends and they are kinda creepy. They are immature and I’m glad that she made friends with you. Maybe she will do something with her life now.” He looked at her with a smile.
Erica knew where this was going. She didn’t have a chance to open her mouth, because Kevin was faster.
“Erica I know you told me that we can only be friends. And I know you don’t want to mix your personal life with work, but…” He paused for a second. “I really like you. Not only as a friend, Erica. And I think you know that.”
Erica was still watching him. She knew that they would have to have this conversation sooner or later, but she was praying for later.
“Kevin…” She started. “There was a reason why I told you that we can only be friends.” She sat on the chair next to him.
“Yes, I know that you’re a private person. Listen, I am not the kind of guy who likes one night stands and…”
“Kevin! I know! I know about this. I know that you are totally different and that you are everything a woman could want from a man.”
“So what’s the problem? Please don’t tell me that I am too good for you, because that would be just insulting my intelligence.” He crossed his arms.
Erica was watching him carefully. She really cared about their friendship. He really was everything she needed from a friend. A really good friend. Maybe for now, her best friend. After that thought, she did something she wasn’t sure why she was doing. Erica uncrossed his arms and grabbed his hands with her own. They had never touched each other that way. She hugged him once on his birthday, but it was more his action than hers.
Kevin moved his gaze to her hands still holding his and smiled a little.
“Kevin.” She sighed. “Kevin, look at me.”
He raised his head and their eyes locked.
“Kevin, I am gay.” Erica said quietly, still looking into his eyes.
She had said those words only two times before. The first time, when she was with Callie. The second time, to her parents and sister, when she was visiting them in Chicago and they had asked her why she left Seattle so suddenly. The first time, she was crying. The second time, no one was crying. Her parents just sat with her and started to talk about it, and her sister just laughed and said: FINALLY!
But now… for the first time she had made someone cry with these words. She was watching Kevin, as his eyes started to get misty. She had never thought that her private life and that who she is, could make someone cry.
Kevin loudly swallowed the lump in his throat. He pulled out his hands out of Erica’s and stood up. Erica was still sitting on her chair.
“I’m sorry. I should’ve told you earlier.”
“Are you…” He started. “Are you and Laura…”
“Kevin…” She sighed.
“Just answer please.”
“No.” She shook her head.
“You know that she likes you? Probably the same way I do.” He was looking at the films, not at her.
“I… don’t know…” She stood up and moved closer to him. “We went out once and she helped me with my things when I was moving in.”
“Do you like her?” He still was looking at the films.
“I like her. But…”
“Erica…” He cut her off. “It’s ok. I am a grown man. I can handle it. If you like my sister and you want to be with her… that’s ok.” He finally looked at her.
“Kevin, I didn’t say that…”
“Could you please leave me alone for a moment?” He cut her off.
Erica left the room without a word. After all this, she wanted to call Laura and cancel their evening, but she thought that it would upset Kevin even more if she did that.
Lucky for her she got paged to the OR. She was thanking God for the stupidity of a man who wanted to show his son how to play Tarzan and he landed in the ER with a big branch in his chest. The surgery ended after 8pm so she would be able to leave soon. Her mind was clear after the surgery and for a little while, she forgot about what had happened with Kevin. It all came back immediately, when she saw Laura waiting for her in the lobby.
“Ready to go, Doctor Hahn?” Laura asked with a huge grin.
“No.” Erica muttered.
“Sorry I didn’t hear you.” Laura held the doors for Erica.
Erica sighed. “Yes, I am ready.” She lied.
Erica was silent for most of the car ride. Laura was talking about some night club that her friend owned. Erica didn’t listen to her attentively. She was still thinking about Kevin’s reaction. Wait! Had Laura said night club?
“Where are we going?” Erica asked suddenly, without noticing that she had interrupted Laura.
“Umm… I told you. My friend is opening a new club today and it is amazing.”
“Oh… ok.” Erica said quietly.
Laura started to talk again but this time Erica tried to focus. She didn’t have to for too long though, because Laura pulled over in front of the club.
“Ok. Come on, doctor Hahn. Let’s get you a drink first.”
They stepped out of the car and walked into the club.
“Laura!” A young man with an awful yellow hat on his head shouted, when they made their way to the bar.
“Sean!” Laura hugged him. “This is amazing!” She looked around.
“Thank you! Drinks are on the house.” He smiled and looked at Erica. “And who’s the old lady with you?” He asked laughing.
“Excuse me?” Erica asked clearly pissed.
“Erica, he was joking.” Laura moved closer and tried to calm her. “He always does that.”
“Nice to meet you, Erica.” He patted her shoulder. “I’m Sean. Please make yourself comfortable and have fun!” He smiled at her and turned to Laura.
“I have to go check on a few things and I’ll be back. Mike and the girls should be here in a minute.” He turned and walked towards the stage.
“What do you want to drink?” Laura asked smiling at Erica.
“Gin with tonic, please.” If she wanted to survive at least a few hours, here she would have to start drinking right then.
Laura went to order their drinks and Erica started to look around. It wasn’t something special, just a club like many others she’d been to before, with Callie. Wait! It’s definitely not the same… “Damn it! She took me to a gay bar!” Erica thought looking at a couple of women kissing each other.
“Do you know them?” Laura appeared behind her.
“No. Why?” Erica turned to her and took her drink. “Thanks.”
“I don’t know. You were watching them, and I just assumed that you probably know them.”
“You have this habit of assuming, don’t you?” Erica teased.
“What do you mean?” Laura smirked.
“Well… first of all, you assumed that I could not resist your attraction. Which I think I am doing pretty well. Second of all, you assumed that after a hard day at work, the best place to go is a night club.” Erica smirked at her.
“That’s why I took you here. You need to chill out!” She moved closer to Erica and kissed her lightly.
The older woman took a step back.
“And now this.” Erica said and shook her head.
“What? Don’t tell me you weren’t enjoying it after our diner.” Laura smiled and moved closer to Erica again.
The blonde stepped away from the younger woman before she could move any further.
“Look. I didn’t say that I wasn’t enjoying it.” Erica paused for a second. “I also didn’t say that I want to do it again.”
“Ok. Let’s just wait and see how it’s gonna be. If you want to take it slow…” She mocked Erica a little. “I can do it slow.”
“Laura! I don’t want to do it slow. I don’t want to do anything. Do you understand?” Erica asked, annoyed.
She was getting more and more angry and tired with every minute that passed. She shouldn’t have agreed to this. This whole thing with Kevin and now this… it was just too much for one evening. And she was too tired. She couldn’t get Kevin’s face out of her mind. He was crying for God’s sake. If he had been crying, just how strong were his feelings for her? She hadn’t realized it was something serious like that. And now? She barely knew Laura but she was doing the same thing to her. Jesus… how the hell did she get into the middle of this whole mess so suddenly?
“I am really sorry Laura. Thank you for the evening and for… everything.” Erica said sadly and made her way to the exit. She was thanking God that Laura didn’t follow her.
At 4am Julia was going back from Kevin’s place to her own. She was at the hospital checking on her partner when she bumped into her friend. He was so upset that she took him home. They talked for hours. He told her what happened. He knew that he could tell Julia. She wasn’t the kind of person who would go and tell everyone that Erica Hahn was gay and that Kevin Adams was so stupid to fall in love with her.
Julia drove her car from Kevin’s street and turned left to the street where Erica lived. As she was passing her house she stopped immediately, seeing something strange. Two people were walking around Erica’s house and one of them was checking the windows. Julia stepped out of her car and quietly closed her door. She walked closer to assess what was going on. One of these people finally managed to open the window and started to climb into the house. The other person said something and ran into the forest. Julia ran towards the house and squat near the open window. She wasn’t sure if this person was armed or not. She pulled her gun carefully and climbed into the house quietly.
When she was inside she looked around, but she couldn’t locate the other person. It was dark and she couldn’t see a damn thing. Suddenly she heard a noise from the kitchen. She stood up from behind the couch and moved slowly towards the kitchen. A few seconds later, something fell on the floor with a loud *thud*, and after that, someone mumbled “Shit!” Julia stepped into the kitchen and spotted the intruder.
“Don’t move!” She pointed her gun to the figure.
“Fuck. I swear I won’t.” It was a woman’s voice and Julia was sure that this woman was drunk like hell. “Don’t shoot me ok! I have familyyyy…” She mumbled.
“Laura?! Is that you?” Julia recognized the voice.
“Yeah.”
“What are you doing here?” Julia asked surprised.
“What are youuu doing here?” Laura chuckled.
Then suddenly the light was turned on. “What are you both doing here?!” Erica asked angrily standing in kitchen doorway with a chair leg in one hand and the phone in the other. “Put that gun down, please!”
Julia did as she was told and turned to Erica.
“I’m sorry. I was passing by your house when I saw someone getting into your house…” She pointed to the open window. “Is that a leg from your chair?” She asked curiously.
“Yes.” Erica answered quickly and turned to the youngest woman. “Laura! What the hell were you thinking?”
Laura laughed and reeled closer to the blonde woman. “I wanted to apologizzzze. And I wanted to say that…” She paused suddenly. “That…”
Erica looked at her, annoyed.
“That… oh fuck, I need to sit down.” And with that she fainted.
Erica dropped everything that she had in her hands on the floor, just in time to catch Laura before she hit the ground.
“Help me move her onto the couch.” Erica ordered to Julia, who quickly grabbed her younger friend.
They carried her into the living room and lay her on the couch.
“Thanks.” Erica said quietly checking Laura’s pulse. “She should be alright tomorrow. With a huge hangover, but alright.” She shook her head.
“Do you want me to take her home?” Julia asked.
“It’s ok. I think I need to talk to her…” She paused and looked at a sleeping Laura. “Again.” She added.
“I didn’t know you two were together.”
“We are not together!” Erica looked at the shorter woman and crossed her arms.
“Ok. Do you want to press charges?”
“Of course not!” Erica took a blanket from the nearest armchair and covered Laura.
They were standing in silence, watching Laura, when Erica finally broke the silence.
“Thank you by the way… for coming here after the non-thief.” She laughed a little.
Julia nodded. “It’s ok.” She smiled.
“Do you want something to drink?” Erica started to walk towards the kitchen.
“Water will be just fine. Thank you.” Julia followed the blonde woman.
When she entered the kitchen, Erica picked up the chair leg and her phone from the floor. Julia also noticed Erica’s Seattle t-shirt and sleeping pants covered by bottles and shots of tequila.
“You must really love tequila.” Julia laughed.
“What?” Erica turned to her and noticed that she was looking at her pants. “Oh. No. They’re not mine, they’re my…” Her voice trailed off. “They’re not mine.” She repeated and gave Julia a bottle of water and a glass.
“Hmm…”
“What?” Erica asked sitting opposite her.
“Are you ok?” Julia took a sip of her water. “I mean with Laura and this whole situation?”
“I was a little nervous when I heard the noise she made when she entered the house. She wouldn’t make a great thief, though. She’s too loud.”
“So you heard her from the beginning?” Julia asked, surprised.
“Yeah. That’s why I took this leg with me.” She pointed to the wooden stick next to her. “I have this very old chair in my bedroom. All legs are like that.” She added, seeing Julia’s questioning gaze.
“There was also someone else, but he ran into the forest after she managed to climb over the window.”
“I don’t know. Maybe it was her friend.” She shrugged. “I really don’t care. I just want to talk to her and put an end to all this mess.” Erica sighed deeply.
Julia was watching her for a moment not sure if she should bring Kevin into this conversation, but after all, she didn’t have anything to lose.
“I was coming back from Kevin’s place when I saw her.” She said quietly.
Erica blushed lightly but managed to look into Julia’s eyes.
“He told you what happened, didn’t he?” Erica said calmly.
“I’ve never seen him like that, you know.”
“Look…” Erica begun but Julia cut her off.
“No. No. Listen to me first, please.” She shifted on her stool. “I don’t blame you for what happened. Damn you shouldn’t even care if I would. But he is really in love with you. He was upset with you because he thought you two were good friends, and he didn’t know such an important thing about you.”
“He knows me quite well, so at this point he should know that I don’t talk too much about my personal life. Especially something that personal.”
“I thought that you don’t care who knows; he told me that you went out with Laura.”
“I don’t care. It’s not that I am hiding it or something. There wasn’t any occasion to mention it. I just… I am not a very social person. I just don’t like to talk about my personal life. It’s mine and that’s all.”
Julia laughed lightly.
“What?” Erica asked.
“Well that’s true. You are not a social person. I mean the way you talked to me at the hospital… are you always so… professional and official?” The policewoman asked, still laughing.
“I was like that only because you were like some damn Robocop. You were like that from the beginning.” Erica replied with a little smirk on her face.
“Beginning?”
“The day that Laura had the accident?! You came to me asking all these questions about the time of the accident. You were so… professional then.”
“Pffftt! I was tired then. I had had an awful shift: some junkie smacked my face and later, I had a huge argument with my chief. And after that, when I was only thinking about my bed, you three appeared with this accident. They are my friends so I helped as much as I could. If it had only been you, I surely would have passed right by you on the highway.” She smirked and waited for Erica’s reply.
Both women started to enjoy this conversation. It was late or early - depending on how you looked at it - for both of them, but they really were enjoying each other’s company.
“Well if you had left me there, I probably couldn’t have saved your partner’s life later.”
“Point taken.”
They both laughed.
“Ok, so we are robots at work, but here, now… we are pretty good at this non-robot thing.” Julia said.
“True.” Erica covered her mouth and yawned. “Sorry.”
“No, I am sorry. It’s after 5am. I should go.” Julia said, embarrassed.
“Look it’s late and you are tired. And I don’t want another accident or another reason for Kevin to be angry at me, so please… I have a guest room. I’ll give you fresh towels and something to sleep in.” Erica stood up from her place.
“I don’t want to cause you any more trouble.” Julia looked at the couch.
“It’s not a problem. If it were, I wouldn’t be offering it to you.” They walked into the living room.
Erica checked on Laura, who was sleeping like a baby. And then showed Julia her room.
“The bathroom is over there, and I will bring you some towels and something to change into.” She smiled and left the room.
Julia didn’t have to wait for too long. Erica brought her all the things she had promised earlier.
“Do you need anything else?” The blonde asked.
“It’s fine. Thank you.” She took the things from Erica.
“Ok, then. Have a good night.”
“You too. Thank you.” Julia smiled and watched Erica walk out of her room.
Erica was in her bed thinking about everything that had happened that night. She finally was able to think properly about what Laura had done and what she was going to tell her in the morning. She said she was here to apologize to her. But what for? Erica was the one who should apologize. She obviously gave her false hope at some point. Well, Laura was also incredibly conceited, and stubborn. Erica sighed and closed her eyes and snuggled into her pillow. She could hear Julia’s steps, walking from the bathroom to the bedroom. She smiled to herself and fell asleep.
