Long time no see
Despite me not updating this in ages, I check LJ everyday. So I'm still reading everything you guys write, just rarely commenting. I wish I would have updated this on a more frequent basis. To sum up everything since missed, i moved out of those apartments I lived in, got a house with tim and my best friend..and have spent everyday since stoned at the least. 2008 seems so far as nothing other then a drug binge. Heavy on the binge the past 2 months. It doesn't even matter what I am being offered, I will literrarly say yes to just about anything I can get my hands on. And everything is chased with booze. And i dropped a lot of weight, and am almost back to 100 but at the same time feel like my body still looks like a mess. I am a mess. I'm also worried about my memory because I feel like it's lacking lately. I have the hardest time remembering simple things. Or separating what I think was something I dreamt with reality, and vise versa. First week of april i did about 25mg xanax in less then 3 full days. That entire week is a complete black blank question mark in my head. People think I may have caused retrograde amnesia since I had no intentions of taking more then 2mg i had to start with. And now i don't know if my memory problems were caused by this or started even before that.
I'm almost glad I don't have money this week.
...I'm saying this now but come wednesday i'll probably be singing another tune.
I just need to learn how to have fun again without depending on a drug/booze.
This would be less hard if I didn't live in nebraska.
I'm hoping this warm weather on the rise will change all this crazyness i've been feeling.
I'm almost glad I don't have money this week.
...I'm saying this now but come wednesday i'll probably be singing another tune.
I just need to learn how to have fun again without depending on a drug/booze.
This would be less hard if I didn't live in nebraska.
I'm hoping this warm weather on the rise will change all this crazyness i've been feeling.