Inauguration, part 2: Boobs and beards
There were many indelible images from the Obama inauguration. Obama at the podium, the 1.4 million on the National Mall, Malia and Sasha looking fierce as can be, Barack and Michelle walking down the street, Cheney in a wheelchair.
And later that night, too. Beyonce serenading Barack and Michelle in their first dance like some bizarre national wedding would be easy to make fun of it not for the fact that it was just too ... beautiful? Can a couple look any more in love than they do? And when Barack said, "How good does my wife look?" he showed again why he's just too cool to be president.
But I have two images forever burned into my brain from Tuessday: Beyonce's nipples, and Sting's beard.
I know Beyonce has a crazy history of ka-razy clothes, but she gets so close to right here. However, no one ever told her that you can't wrap oneself in skin-tight pale silk without at least some nipple covers?
Also, Ms. Fierce is reasonably and naturally buxom - show some love to your boobs and to the profile of your dress, and prop them up. If she liked 'em then she shoulda put a bra on 'em. Such a good try, Beyonce, and you looked beautiful, but you lose a couple of points.
Still, she looked great! Sting, on the other hand, needs to go back to the mountain cabin he's been shut in for the past year. What the FUCK is with that beard? It's even worse in motion, such as during this disastrous rendition of "Signed, Sealed, Delivered":
"I've done a lot of foolish things," indeed. Sting devolves into a mess of hair and teeth. He shows what happens when people who don't have enough soul try to sing like they do - the shouting, the immeasurable shouting. It's like Elton John on "That's What Friends Are For" times 10.
And he's not the only one that falls into the shouty McSoul strategy - thank you, Faith Hill. Or the shouty McSoul with a side order of bad multi-note runs, like Shakira. Wow, she really, really, really can't sing (high comedy for her playing the harmonica on "Bright Side of the Road"), and her skirt didn't go with the corset, but she is hot. (Why didn't Beyonce and Shakira recreate their "Beautiful Liar" music video? Tune in around 2:24. Yowza.) And Stevie valiantly tries to rescue his own song before Will.I.Am hijacks it for kills it for good.
And later that night, too. Beyonce serenading Barack and Michelle in their first dance like some bizarre national wedding would be easy to make fun of it not for the fact that it was just too ... beautiful? Can a couple look any more in love than they do? And when Barack said, "How good does my wife look?" he showed again why he's just too cool to be president.
Click to viewBut I have two images forever burned into my brain from Tuessday: Beyonce's nipples, and Sting's beard.
I know Beyonce has a crazy history of ka-razy clothes, but she gets so close to right here. However, no one ever told her that you can't wrap oneself in skin-tight pale silk without at least some nipple covers?
Also, Ms. Fierce is reasonably and naturally buxom - show some love to your boobs and to the profile of your dress, and prop them up. If she liked 'em then she shoulda put a bra on 'em. Such a good try, Beyonce, and you looked beautiful, but you lose a couple of points.
Still, she looked great! Sting, on the other hand, needs to go back to the mountain cabin he's been shut in for the past year. What the FUCK is with that beard? It's even worse in motion, such as during this disastrous rendition of "Signed, Sealed, Delivered":
"I've done a lot of foolish things," indeed. Sting devolves into a mess of hair and teeth. He shows what happens when people who don't have enough soul try to sing like they do - the shouting, the immeasurable shouting. It's like Elton John on "That's What Friends Are For" times 10.
And he's not the only one that falls into the shouty McSoul strategy - thank you, Faith Hill. Or the shouty McSoul with a side order of bad multi-note runs, like Shakira. Wow, she really, really, really can't sing (high comedy for her playing the harmonica on "Bright Side of the Road"), and her skirt didn't go with the corset, but she is hot. (Why didn't Beyonce and Shakira recreate their "Beautiful Liar" music video? Tune in around 2:24. Yowza.) And Stevie valiantly tries to rescue his own song before Will.I.Am hijacks it for kills it for good.