everything is determined on an answer
well as i wait to hear from vicky i ponder to myself she is truely happy right now and it isnt me who is making her happy it is herself which is good to hear. everyone in my life as well as hers knows that all i want is for her to be happy and if she is happy without me then so be it maybe fate doesnt work to our advantage this time. i wish things went better for us in the past so that i could be day dreaming about when i leave work i know i am going straight to her house to see her and to hold her but they sometimes dont work out that way. it confuses me how that i am apart from her right now and every second my love grows more. this feeling of love is almost like your on your way up to heaven after living an amazing life and for some reason you are stuck in the middle wanting so bad to continue on to that heaven but something is holding you back. I'm not saying she is holding back I'm saying that she is that heaven and i am stuck in the middle b/c i cant quite reach her yet and i dont really know what else i can do so that i can take another step towards her. all i can do i s perfect myself with knowing that she is casting her shadow over me, waiting for me to reach that level. whether or not she can see us together now is up to her cause my decision has already been made. she told me last night she saw us being together in the past and in the future but not in the present. how does one look at that answer when the present is always all the time. so does it mean there will never be us again or does it mean her present is carried up to a point and then when her future sets in it is really the present but the present with us being together. but anyways i loved her more then anything ever in my exsistence and i still love her to this day. i am dealing with my issues so that we can be together soon (happilly together) and she is doing what she must to find herself. can anyone fill me in on what it might take to get her back into my life and me into hers only to be happy, in love, and together?