(no subject)
Check out this brochure I found at a pizza place in Baltimore. "24 hour emergency service" ? How can it be an emergency if the dog is dead? According to this brochure,
"We provide our families with an individual cremation for their pet. Our package includes meeting with the family to discuss cremation options, signing the authorization, picking up your beloved pet from the place of death, the cremation, and the delivery of the ashes back to the family."
It also says that they offer a wide selection of pet urns, keepsake jewelry, picture frames, memorial plaques, and cemetery markers. Most urns can be personalized with engraving, pictures, or breed specific emblems. Who would pay money for that?
So it goes on to say that they charge by weight as follows:
Pocket Pets (gerbils, hamsters, birds, rabbits, farrets, etc..) $150.00
Non Pocket pets up to 25 pounds (cats, toy dogs, etc.) $175.00
Pets 26-50 pounds $200.00
Pets 51-75 pounds $225.00
Pets 76-100 pounds $250.00
Pets 101-149 pounds $300.00
Small livestock over 150 pounds $325.00 plus $1.50 per pound in excess of 150 pounds. (sheep, goats, pigs, llamas)
(At this time we are not able to cremate larger livestock animals)
Good God. Would you pay $150 to cremate your ferret? Would you pay another $100 to buy personalized urn with "breed specific patterns?" Would you pay $10,000 (or something) to have your pet's ashes compressed into jewelry so you and Fido can be together forever? I wouldn't and I quite frankly don't know who would.
Now, I understand saving a lock of hair in a picture frame or something, but come on. This is just rediculous. Can you imagine a frantic call from some person whose fish just died?
- "Quickly! Come pick up my fish! I want the best cremation money can buy! I want the biggest urn you've got! And a necklace!"
- "I'm sorry sir, we don't do fish. They tend to put out the fire. Just flush the sucker."
Or at least that's what I would say...