For Bowdlerized - Part 2midnitemaraud_rJuly 26 2009, 07:43:51 UTC
Remus raised his eyebrows.
"Look. It's us. They probably thought it was another prank, like that time we cast that charm back in fifth year-what did you name it? The Pie Charm or something?"
"Pied Piper," Remus said, smiling somewhat reluctantly at the memory of the entire school, including half the staff, marching single file out of the Great Hall. "Really?" he asked. Maybe Sirius was right. Perhaps he was overreacting. "You don't think they know?"
"Absolutely not," Sirius said, leaning down and brushing Remus' fringe back from his forehead. "Hey. We're all alone now. And we've got the lube..." he said, waggling his eyebrows.
Remus shook his head and grinned. "Randy bastard. You just want to get off," he said, grabbing the front of Sirius' robes and pulling him down to kiss him. Okay, so maybe Sirius wasn't the only one who wanted to get off, and his erection did seem to be reviving.
They both jumped, and Remus bit Sirius's lip reflexively as the door to the room banged open.
"What do you mean, you heard?" Remus asked with a sinking feeling in his chest.
James tossed his broom on his bed, pulled out half a dozen non-descript small bottles from the pockets of his Quidditch kit, and waved them back and forth in his hands, a wide grin on his face.
"Wormtail's got a few more, but I'm afraid we couldn't collect them all." He put the bottles on the table next to Remus' bed, cleared his throat in exaggerated fashion, and waggled his finger at Sirius. "Next time you do a Summoning Charm when you're ah, feeling a little...excitable, Padfoot, you might want to stop what you're doing first and focus a bit more."
Remus felt nauseated, and Sirius' face was pale and blank with shock. "James..." Remus said, a distinct edge to his voice.
"We got pelted with so many bottles of lube on the pitch, we had to cancel practice!" he said, trying to stifle his laughter. "I hope they weren't all yours, you perverted bastards.
"Oh, and I'd avoid P-Peeves if I were you, M-Moony," he added, his face practically purple with effort. "He's g-got a new ditty for you," he sputtered, and collapsed on the floor, laughing.
Remus swallowed and tried not to be sick as he pushed Sirius away, and reached yet again for his pillow. I'm never leaving this room, he thought. They can bury me under the stone floor.
The door to their dormitory was still open, and from the common room, there was a loud roar of laughter. Above the din, it wasn't too difficult to hear Peeves' scratchy off-key voice, chanting, "Loony 'Looby' Lube-in..."
Re: For Bowdlerized - Part 2midnitemaraud_rJuly 26 2009, 20:09:51 UTC
Thanks, Gina! It's funny - when I started it, I had 300+ words, and no idea what it was they were 'not happy' about. Once I decided, I couldn't stop myself. Drabble shmabble. Hee!
Re: For Bowdlerized - Part 2midnitemaraud_rJuly 26 2009, 20:15:10 UTC
Thanks, hon! ♥ Oh, Peeves is trying to come up with one for Sirius, too, but all he's got so far is how Sirius was delirious, haughty and naughty, but still a rube... :-P Might have to think a bit more on that one!
"Look. It's us. They probably thought it was another prank, like that time we cast that charm back in fifth year-what did you name it? The Pie Charm or something?"
"Pied Piper," Remus said, smiling somewhat reluctantly at the memory of the entire school, including half the staff, marching single file out of the Great Hall. "Really?" he asked. Maybe Sirius was right. Perhaps he was overreacting. "You don't think they know?"
"Absolutely not," Sirius said, leaning down and brushing Remus' fringe back from his forehead. "Hey. We're all alone now. And we've got the lube..." he said, waggling his eyebrows.
Remus shook his head and grinned. "Randy bastard. You just want to get off," he said, grabbing the front of Sirius' robes and pulling him down to kiss him. Okay, so maybe Sirius wasn't the only one who wanted to get off, and his erection did seem to be reviving.
They both jumped, and Remus bit Sirius's lip reflexively as the door to the room banged open.
"Ow! Merlin's balls, Prongs! We're busy!" Sirius yelled, rubbing his lip.
James snickered. "So I heard."
"What do you mean, you heard?" Remus asked with a sinking feeling in his chest.
James tossed his broom on his bed, pulled out half a dozen non-descript small bottles from the pockets of his Quidditch kit, and waved them back and forth in his hands, a wide grin on his face.
"Wormtail's got a few more, but I'm afraid we couldn't collect them all." He put the bottles on the table next to Remus' bed, cleared his throat in exaggerated fashion, and waggled his finger at Sirius. "Next time you do a Summoning Charm when you're ah, feeling a little...excitable, Padfoot, you might want to stop what you're doing first and focus a bit more."
Remus felt nauseated, and Sirius' face was pale and blank with shock. "James..." Remus said, a distinct edge to his voice.
"We got pelted with so many bottles of lube on the pitch, we had to cancel practice!" he said, trying to stifle his laughter. "I hope they weren't all yours, you perverted bastards.
"Oh, and I'd avoid P-Peeves if I were you, M-Moony," he added, his face practically purple with effort. "He's g-got a new ditty for you," he sputtered, and collapsed on the floor, laughing.
Remus swallowed and tried not to be sick as he pushed Sirius away, and reached yet again for his pillow. I'm never leaving this room, he thought. They can bury me under the stone floor.
The door to their dormitory was still open, and from the common room, there was a loud roar of laughter. Above the din, it wasn't too difficult to hear Peeves' scratchy off-key voice, chanting, "Loony 'Looby' Lube-in..."
~*~
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Thanks, hon! Glad you liked it!
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♥ ♥
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