Confusion!!!!!
FUCKING SHIT!!!! I FUCKING HATE MY FUCKING COMPUTER!!!! I was just confused but now I'm very very pissed off. So, I had just written this entry and I was proof reading it when my computer decided to fucking restart. Now I have to fucking try to write the whole damn thing over again. FUCK YOU GATEWAY AND BILL GATES!!!
Anyway, lets see if I can remember everything I typed. Dan just called me (he's in Austin, Texas right now) and we were just talking and everything but he brought up some issues in my life that I've been trying to avoid thinking about. They aren't really that bad...well I'm not sure if they are bad or not. First of all, Dan is so cute. Like he seems really protective of me. Like every time I start talking about someone he doesn't know he's always like who is this? Are ya'll dating? It sometimes seems like he's jealous...well jealous isn't the right word but anyway. So I'm so confused about what is going on with Dan and I, Jay and I, Aaron and I, and Matt and I.
DAN AND I:
I really like Dan and I think he really likes me. The only problem we have is that I'm in Lansing and he's in Ann Arbor. Like I think we would be boyfriends if it wasn't for the distance. It's not really that far away, but I would like the person I'm dating to be a little closer than that. And I mean I like driving and I don't really mind the drive but I am getting tired of it. I mean every time we hang out I'm always driving over there. The only time he comes here is when he is driving to his parents place and Lansing is half way so he'll stop and see me. And I know that it's harder for him to come out here than it is for me to come out there but anyway. I just don't know what's going on between him and I.
JAY AND I:
Ok everyone knows that Jay and I have started talking again. Which he has been such an emotional rollercoster for me. I mean part of me still loves him but part of me hates him for what he did to me and how he treated me. Plus I have some people telling me that it's ok that I'm talking to him again but others are like no never talk to him again in your entire life. So I don't even know if I want to date him anymore like I did when I first meet him. At this point we are just friends and I think it will stay that way by my chose. I don't know though, it's like we picked up exactly where we left off in January. Like we talk every day on the phone. I don't know.
AARON AND I:
Ok, so this one is new to me. So I was at Spiral on Saturday like usual and Matt comes up to me and was like hey I heard you're semi/partially dating Aaron. I was like what? I didn't know anything about that. So I asked him who told him that and he said Scott. Which Scott is Aaron's best friend so I'm guessing one of two things happened. 1) Aaron actually said something to Scott about us partially dating or 2) Aaron said something to Scott about how much we've been hanging out and Scott came up with the semi/partially dating thing himself. Which Aaron and I have been hanging out alot the past few weeks. I mean I like hanging out with Aaron, he's cool. And yeah I think he's cute, but I already said something about us dating when we first met and he said no. So, I'm going to think number 2 is what happened. Like I don't know if I should talk to Aaron and see what is going on or what. I'm to nervous to talk to him about that anyway. As I see it if by some weird chance he does want something now then he can say something to me. I mean I already said something to him once.
MATT AND I:
Ok, so there isn't really anything going on between us except friendship. But he is really hot and so so sweet. And yes I do have a crush on him and he knows it. We talked about it when he came over here on Wednesday. I've only hung out with him like three times though. That's too soon to know if you want anything from someone right? I mean I don't even know what he thinks about me at all. Well, as of right now we are just friends and that is very cool.
I think I'm just as confused as I was when I first meet Jay and look where that lead too. It seems like everything is just going to be a big disaster. I don't know if anything good can come from any of this.
Anyway, lets see if I can remember everything I typed. Dan just called me (he's in Austin, Texas right now) and we were just talking and everything but he brought up some issues in my life that I've been trying to avoid thinking about. They aren't really that bad...well I'm not sure if they are bad or not. First of all, Dan is so cute. Like he seems really protective of me. Like every time I start talking about someone he doesn't know he's always like who is this? Are ya'll dating? It sometimes seems like he's jealous...well jealous isn't the right word but anyway. So I'm so confused about what is going on with Dan and I, Jay and I, Aaron and I, and Matt and I.
DAN AND I:
I really like Dan and I think he really likes me. The only problem we have is that I'm in Lansing and he's in Ann Arbor. Like I think we would be boyfriends if it wasn't for the distance. It's not really that far away, but I would like the person I'm dating to be a little closer than that. And I mean I like driving and I don't really mind the drive but I am getting tired of it. I mean every time we hang out I'm always driving over there. The only time he comes here is when he is driving to his parents place and Lansing is half way so he'll stop and see me. And I know that it's harder for him to come out here than it is for me to come out there but anyway. I just don't know what's going on between him and I.
JAY AND I:
Ok everyone knows that Jay and I have started talking again. Which he has been such an emotional rollercoster for me. I mean part of me still loves him but part of me hates him for what he did to me and how he treated me. Plus I have some people telling me that it's ok that I'm talking to him again but others are like no never talk to him again in your entire life. So I don't even know if I want to date him anymore like I did when I first meet him. At this point we are just friends and I think it will stay that way by my chose. I don't know though, it's like we picked up exactly where we left off in January. Like we talk every day on the phone. I don't know.
AARON AND I:
Ok, so this one is new to me. So I was at Spiral on Saturday like usual and Matt comes up to me and was like hey I heard you're semi/partially dating Aaron. I was like what? I didn't know anything about that. So I asked him who told him that and he said Scott. Which Scott is Aaron's best friend so I'm guessing one of two things happened. 1) Aaron actually said something to Scott about us partially dating or 2) Aaron said something to Scott about how much we've been hanging out and Scott came up with the semi/partially dating thing himself. Which Aaron and I have been hanging out alot the past few weeks. I mean I like hanging out with Aaron, he's cool. And yeah I think he's cute, but I already said something about us dating when we first met and he said no. So, I'm going to think number 2 is what happened. Like I don't know if I should talk to Aaron and see what is going on or what. I'm to nervous to talk to him about that anyway. As I see it if by some weird chance he does want something now then he can say something to me. I mean I already said something to him once.
MATT AND I:
Ok, so there isn't really anything going on between us except friendship. But he is really hot and so so sweet. And yes I do have a crush on him and he knows it. We talked about it when he came over here on Wednesday. I've only hung out with him like three times though. That's too soon to know if you want anything from someone right? I mean I don't even know what he thinks about me at all. Well, as of right now we are just friends and that is very cool.
I think I'm just as confused as I was when I first meet Jay and look where that lead too. It seems like everything is just going to be a big disaster. I don't know if anything good can come from any of this.