almost over
The last week of October and the first few days of November hold a special place of misery and depression in my past and those thoughts come to the forefront tonight... three different relationships met with unwanted demise in this 10 day period over the course of my short life...usually I get even more stoned and detatched from things but with my current prohibition from smoking I find myself dwelling much more then I have the last couple years... thought about getting totally wasted and maybe heading out to make some mischief but I know that won't solve anything... just another futile attempt to escape... so I guess I will just deal and try and put the past to rest... just sucks when you have to make your own closure over things... I have lost touch with two of the principal parties a long time ago and voluntarily don't speak to the most recent one even though she still lives in the same city as me... just another reason to wallow I guess... but its almost over.. just few more days to go... Fall takes on a whole different meaning for me, for real.