I was wrong
When have I ever not been able to think of a song to encapsulate or at least capture what I'm feeling? Never! This is freaking me out.
But anyway...I thought that this entry (the yay I'm home for Spring break entry) would be different. I thought I would be relaxed...I didn't think it would be like this.
Home SUCKS. I am so unhappy...I feel like I'm going to cry all the time and I choke back the tears, because I'm not allowed to create any more stress for my parents. So I wait until they fall asleep. And then I feel like a bitch, because I'm crying and depressed...but at least I'm still alive. Thinking of Shannyn sometimes makes me feel so guilty. How can my life possibly be so sad? It's not like I've been denied the rest of my life...
It's like a vicious cycle. I'm depressed, then I feel guilty, which in turn makes me feel worse...and so on. And to make matters worse, I haven't even started thinking about my DA appointment. This is going to be a long week. Anyone care to help me survive it?
But anyway...I thought that this entry (the yay I'm home for Spring break entry) would be different. I thought I would be relaxed...I didn't think it would be like this.
Home SUCKS. I am so unhappy...I feel like I'm going to cry all the time and I choke back the tears, because I'm not allowed to create any more stress for my parents. So I wait until they fall asleep. And then I feel like a bitch, because I'm crying and depressed...but at least I'm still alive. Thinking of Shannyn sometimes makes me feel so guilty. How can my life possibly be so sad? It's not like I've been denied the rest of my life...
It's like a vicious cycle. I'm depressed, then I feel guilty, which in turn makes me feel worse...and so on. And to make matters worse, I haven't even started thinking about my DA appointment. This is going to be a long week. Anyone care to help me survive it?