Harry Potter/Lord of the Rings MST
(Gareth appears!)
(Dark Side: Hold still, Garet, you must die for your infamous crimes!)
(Gareth: I wish I was infamous, but, as a special New Years treat, I got a fic for you guys to MST!)
(Queen: One, I'm not a 'guy', and two, what is it?)
(Gareth: A Starjeffry fic! But to be nice, it's not one of the 'hardcore' ones. It's called 'Crimson Blood' or someting and it's about EMO Harry and Frodo! *runs off*)
(Queen: Let's get this over with...)
This 1 is a rlly serius fic. Its really sad you guys i cried when I wrote it.
(Queen: Oh boy. This isn't a good sign. His spelling and grammar are worse than Bruzzini's!)
(Bruzzini: Yeah!)
My friend is also a cutter so ths is an issue vaery close to me. I also have freinds that do drugs aokat and I know what I'm taliking about!
(Queen: Wait..is this that damn xxxbloodyrists666xxx girl?)
(Bruzzini bursts out in hysterical laughter.)
(Bruzzini: Hee hee, a camera had an anus and Dumbledore clogged it up!)
(Queen: What?)
(Bruzzini: That xxxbloodyrists666xxx girl did write 'Dumbledore had constipated the cideo camera', didn't she?)
(Queen sighs.)
PS: THANKS TO SARAH FOR FIXING MY SPELLING LUV YA GURL lol
(Queen: Well, Sarah didn't do a good job, obviously.)
(Dark Side: She should also die for her infamous crimes!)
WARNING CHARACTER DEATH
(Dark Side: Alright!)
---------------------
(Bruzzini: Heh, reminds me of a railroad. Choo choo!)
Harry pulled on his backpack and walked into the common room and set it down on a chair and sat in a different chair and put his head in his hands. Frodo walked (HE GOES TYO THE SAME SCHOOL, OKAY!)
(Queen: HOGWARTS IS IN SCOTLAND, NOT MIDDLE EARTH! AND WHAT IS TYO?)
(Bruzzini: I'd like to go to Hogwarts. There I'd practise the Dark Arts and the trolls will be big and muscular, not pencil-necked cyclopses!)
(Queen (to Dark Side): We get him, tonight!)
in and said "What's wrong?"
(Dark Side (Harry): Voldemort's still alive!)
(Bruzzini (Harry): I have to jerk off 'round the clock because I don't have a girlfriend!)
(Queen (Harry): The Suethors won't leave me alone!)
"I'm feeling really depressed" said Harry.
(Queen: Well, he would. Dumbledore died!)
"Me too. All the time." siad Frodo.
(Queen: Now Frodo's just being a drama queen.)
"I feel so bad, man" said Harry. Harry a little baggy out of his lunch box.
(Queen: Where's the verb?)
"What's that?" asked Frodo.
(Dark Side (Harry): It's poison...)
"Some weed. You wanna smoke with me?"
"Yeah." they went out onto the balcony and rolled a blunt. They puff puff passed for a while and soon they were very much high.
(Bruzzini: 'Very much high'? That sounds like Mumbo from Banjo Kazooie. That game is evil and deceptive. It's about a happy little bear and bird, yet it's so damn difficult.)
(Queen: As much as we'd rather talk about Banjo Kazooie, we've got to focus on this story.)
THE NEXT DAY
(Dark Side: The world exploded. Again.)
In the great hall
(Bruzzini:...all da walls were painted black and da tables were black too. But you fould see that there was pink pant underneath the black pant. And there were pastors of poser bands everywhere, like Ashlee Simpson and the Backstreet Boys.)
(Dark Side: xxxbloodyrists666xxx should also die for er infamous crimes!)
Harry and Frodo were wearing black robes with red cuffs and collars. They were unusually quiet and were only talking to each other. Then Siriues Black came in (HE'S NOT DEAD OKAY?) and came up to Frodo and Harry.
(Queen: So Old Sir-a-rooney can resurrect himself?)
(Bruzzini: I wish Greystache would do the same.)
"You guys want some excstacy or acid?"
(Queen: Sirius as a drug dealer. Well, it's not as bad as Dumbledore being an evil poser goth who swears at students.)
Harry and Frodo bought some and went back to their dorm room. They each took some of acid and excstacy.
Soon their boyfriends (Sam and Draco) came in and founf out that they were doing drugs.
(All: OH NO!)
"You need to change your ways, Harry, otherwise it's over."
(Bruzzini: I'm lookin' at the wizard in the mirror, I'm asking can he change his ways...)
(Queen: And Draco and Harry hate each other, don't they?)
"I can't Draco, I can't. This is who I am and if you still don't love me you can go to hell."
(Queen: He practises witchcraft, so he's going to Hell anyway!)
(Bruzzini: Just ask Ned Flanders!)
Draco ran out of the room crying.
Sma said "I know you are a better person than drugs, so please stop."
"I'm sorry, it is who I am as well."
(Queen: Oo, drama! DRAMA! SO DRAMATIC! Wait, I hate new Harry and Frodo!)
(Dark Side: They both should die for their infamous crimes!)
The NEXT DAY
(Queen: Harry and Frodo did more drugs!)
Harry and Frodo remembered that their boyfriends left them last night. Then they threw away all the drugs and tried to stay clean. It was too much and they felt they had no more hope.
(Dark Side: So they killed themselves!)
Frodo pulled out a box of razor blades.
(Dark Side: Yes, yes....)
"Harry" he siad. "Tell Sam I love him I am going to leave this world"
(All: Yes, yes...)
"Wait, I'm going to join you. Thew world doesn't understand us. But, we should at least leave a note for our lovers"
The note siad:
"OIur hearts are stained with black
We won't be coming back
Just always know
we love you so
(Bruzzini: Yawn! I'm a better poet:
There once was a man from France,
Who had polka-dot underpants...)
(Both Queen and Dark Side are entertaining murderous thoughts concerning Bruzzini)
Love,
Frodo and Harry"
After they wrote the note Frodo took one of the razor blades and drew it in one long swipe upon his wrist flesh. The blood poured onto his hand as he pulled out another razor blade for Harry. Harry dug the sharp metal into his skin and watched with satifaction as the blood pooled by his knees.
(Dark Side: Hooray!)
The NEXT DAY
Sam and Draco found their bodies and held their bodies and held tehir still bleeding forms. They decieded that if they couldn't be with them during life they would join them in death.
THE END
(Dark Side: Triple hooray! Sam and Draco should die for their infamous crimes!)
(Bruzzini: Stop saying that, it isn't funny!)
(An anvil falls on Bruzzini)