(no subject)
would you call me shy? would you say that my inability to speak what i think shy? OR is that tact? Is that something that i should strive for? When i speak my mind i feel juvenile, when i don't i feel closed to the world and there is no inbetween. I'm only 17 i know. I shouldn't worry. I'm young and have plenty of time ahead of me. I should just live my life and let go of all this worry. When you lose something and you realize what you have lost and you realize it's your own fault then you try to change the fault you see within yourself don't you? Or is that just me? I see a fault within me and i want to fix it. Is that not normal?
Of course it's normal. I'm me. Everything about me is normal. Because i don't act like my friends i'm not weird. But the thing is i don't act like anyone really... except for myself. So doesn't that make me different? Doesn't that make me even farther removed from normal then them?
I love the sca. it gives me a place to be myself and harldly anyone judges me for it... maybe i should just say i love my barony. I don't know about the rest of the sca. I don't know everyone...
Is it so bad to want something you can't have, no matter how much you try for it? THat you think you shouldn't have it too? Is that a bad thing? Or a normal thing..?
*sigh* short entry today... ah well.. at least it's better then nothing.
Of course it's normal. I'm me. Everything about me is normal. Because i don't act like my friends i'm not weird. But the thing is i don't act like anyone really... except for myself. So doesn't that make me different? Doesn't that make me even farther removed from normal then them?
I love the sca. it gives me a place to be myself and harldly anyone judges me for it... maybe i should just say i love my barony. I don't know about the rest of the sca. I don't know everyone...
Is it so bad to want something you can't have, no matter how much you try for it? THat you think you shouldn't have it too? Is that a bad thing? Or a normal thing..?
*sigh* short entry today... ah well.. at least it's better then nothing.