goodbye to you
well lets see it's been practically a month since i have spoken to him. and i just can't believe how things just turned into shit, because he was weak. that he was dishonest and has really yet to realize the pain he caused me or fix the situation. that my heart is torn as he goes on believing that he will be some famous recording engineer, when i wanted him to be a loving boyfriend and possibly more. but it's almost a week before it makes month #2 and i found myself looking through my old box.
reading through letters of "i love you" and "lets have a family one day." all his dreams included me, but i guess i wasn't what he really wanted in the end. he wanted to turn a 7 year friendship into shit and abandon the one person who would have stayed by his side... who stood by his side. so i just have to do something else. not give myself totally to a person. to believe in them when everyone doubts him. that at least i kept true to myself and i didn't move there. i think he always hated me for that. but now he won't have to deal with my ideas and he won't have to worry about me climbing into his arms again. goodbye the old drea: the dreamer, the mother, the wife, the therapist... hello new drea!
i cannot thank my friends enough. that i didn't lose ya'll. i just wish that he would have loved me more. loved me in the way that i used to love him. but you can't make someone love you.
reading through letters of "i love you" and "lets have a family one day." all his dreams included me, but i guess i wasn't what he really wanted in the end. he wanted to turn a 7 year friendship into shit and abandon the one person who would have stayed by his side... who stood by his side. so i just have to do something else. not give myself totally to a person. to believe in them when everyone doubts him. that at least i kept true to myself and i didn't move there. i think he always hated me for that. but now he won't have to deal with my ideas and he won't have to worry about me climbing into his arms again. goodbye the old drea: the dreamer, the mother, the wife, the therapist... hello new drea!
i cannot thank my friends enough. that i didn't lose ya'll. i just wish that he would have loved me more. loved me in the way that i used to love him. but you can't make someone love you.