too long have i lived alone

[mccullen]

there was a waterbug on my bedroom wall

(spoken aloud to no one) how do i blast that fucker
(runs to bathroom, returns)
(spoken aloud to bug) FUCKER YOU'RE ABOUT TO GET BLASTED
(blasts fucker)*

*sprays wall with Lemon-Scented Scrubbing Bubbles Antibacterial Soap-Scum Remover

(blogs about it)