(no subject)
Had a vivid dream last night. We were performing together on stage...you had your flute, I had a keytar. Sounds incredibly stupid and awesome, right?
I don't know where this is coming from, but I know it's exactly what I want and I'm not afraid of failure anymore. I really don't want to put words in your mouth and it sounds so selfish and narcissistic to say this but I can't help feeling like you want this too, even with the guilt it would bring. Am I wrong??
God I wish I could be there in person just to show you a glimpse of what things could be like; for you to see what it's like to go a full week with at least six hours of sleep a day. To come home to a nice meal and some unwinding time instead of a checklist of things that need to get done so you might possibly survive the rest of the day. I know it all sounds too good to be true but it really isn't; and I'm truly sorry for coming on so strong when it's probably not the most convenient of times, but I just feel like every day that passes is another added on to almost ten years I've wasted because you weren't in them - ten years you've spent soldiering on doing the best you could with what you had when you could've had so much more if I hadn't been such a coward years ago. I have a lot to make up for, I know...but these past few weeks I've practically been walking on water. I feel like I could do anything right now and I know exactly what I want to do with all that potential and who deserves it...it might be a rough start, but we've had obstacles in the way before, lost our way at times, and always ended up back on the same course. I really think we both deserve to win.
God damn it I love you more than I have cared for anything. Just saying it to myself has made getting through every day so much easier.
Posted via m.livejournal.com.
I don't know where this is coming from, but I know it's exactly what I want and I'm not afraid of failure anymore. I really don't want to put words in your mouth and it sounds so selfish and narcissistic to say this but I can't help feeling like you want this too, even with the guilt it would bring. Am I wrong??
God I wish I could be there in person just to show you a glimpse of what things could be like; for you to see what it's like to go a full week with at least six hours of sleep a day. To come home to a nice meal and some unwinding time instead of a checklist of things that need to get done so you might possibly survive the rest of the day. I know it all sounds too good to be true but it really isn't; and I'm truly sorry for coming on so strong when it's probably not the most convenient of times, but I just feel like every day that passes is another added on to almost ten years I've wasted because you weren't in them - ten years you've spent soldiering on doing the best you could with what you had when you could've had so much more if I hadn't been such a coward years ago. I have a lot to make up for, I know...but these past few weeks I've practically been walking on water. I feel like I could do anything right now and I know exactly what I want to do with all that potential and who deserves it...it might be a rough start, but we've had obstacles in the way before, lost our way at times, and always ended up back on the same course. I really think we both deserve to win.
God damn it I love you more than I have cared for anything. Just saying it to myself has made getting through every day so much easier.
Posted via m.livejournal.com.