Postpone Gratification.
You know that if you asked me for something, I'd get it for you in a heartbeat.
Even if I had to travel the world over for one flower so that you would smile for ten minutes -
that adventure would be worth it.
But I never think about what I want in this process.
I just say 'you' and I'm fine with it.
I think.
But maybe, just maybe, you want a version of me thats older, wiser, matured with experience, someone who's practically unafraid of the life you're going to have.
And to do that, I have to put you on the back burner in my life, and I definitely don't want to do that if at all possible.
I was hoping in the depths of my heart, that you and I could brave both worlds together one day.
Recently, it hasn't seemed that this particular dream of mine would come true,
just like a few girls in my past that I've felt this particular way with.
I was never with them, and slowly they just fell from my memory and I only bring them up when I can't take my real life anymore.
Or maybe I just don't want to admit that I've met some new people that actually interest me in an attractive way.
And honestly, these are the first few in a good long while for me.
I"m a little scared and a little excited all at the same time.
I don't know what to do.
I'm definitely not going to aim for three consecutive relationships and terminate the ones that don't make it because one made it first.
I am, and will always be, a one woman guy.
And if it happens that we're meant for the later life, then I'm going to keep you close by for as long as it takes. I was jealous of the boyfriend you had - I wanted to be him, just so that I could have you, and maybe you felt the same way when I was with Rebecca. But as much as I thought about her, I thought about you as well.
I just have to postpone gratification, as Alexa states, until that time for 'us' comes back up.
Lady, I love you, and I mean that with my entire heart shaking behind it.
Even if I had to travel the world over for one flower so that you would smile for ten minutes -
that adventure would be worth it.
But I never think about what I want in this process.
I just say 'you' and I'm fine with it.
I think.
But maybe, just maybe, you want a version of me thats older, wiser, matured with experience, someone who's practically unafraid of the life you're going to have.
And to do that, I have to put you on the back burner in my life, and I definitely don't want to do that if at all possible.
I was hoping in the depths of my heart, that you and I could brave both worlds together one day.
Recently, it hasn't seemed that this particular dream of mine would come true,
just like a few girls in my past that I've felt this particular way with.
I was never with them, and slowly they just fell from my memory and I only bring them up when I can't take my real life anymore.
Or maybe I just don't want to admit that I've met some new people that actually interest me in an attractive way.
And honestly, these are the first few in a good long while for me.
I"m a little scared and a little excited all at the same time.
I don't know what to do.
I'm definitely not going to aim for three consecutive relationships and terminate the ones that don't make it because one made it first.
I am, and will always be, a one woman guy.
And if it happens that we're meant for the later life, then I'm going to keep you close by for as long as it takes. I was jealous of the boyfriend you had - I wanted to be him, just so that I could have you, and maybe you felt the same way when I was with Rebecca. But as much as I thought about her, I thought about you as well.
I just have to postpone gratification, as Alexa states, until that time for 'us' comes back up.
Lady, I love you, and I mean that with my entire heart shaking behind it.