pah!
you ever have a dream where it was so good, and if it came true you wouldn't care about anything else for the rest of your life becasue that one thing was true? yeah that was an awesome dream, except it was so great i was saddened by the fact that it wasn't true... that's never happened before, i usually accept it as a dream... but i guess since i want this so much and i know it'll never happen, i was saddened when i woke up because i realized it was not and never would be true... some would say i should have optimism but i just say i'm being realistic, not pessimistic... whatever, i don't care anymore... just back to status quo.