Application Post Take Two

Jun 05, 2005 19:23

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lordsummer March 7 2011, 05:09:52 UTC
The Midnight Crew and The Felt waged war across the city that had once been Alternia, and eventually the Midnight Crew managed to infiltrate the mansion lair of The Felt's leader: Lord English, said to be an indestructible demon who devoured universes. Slick didn't really give two fucks; he wasn't going to rest until every last one of these ugly green sons of bitches (or, in one particular case, bitch herself) were dead. The Midnight Crew split up throughout the mansion, communicating through walkie-talkies as they battled The Felt and their obnoxious time shenanigans.

After hopping across timelines, murdering several different Felt members, and smashing a shitload of clocks just to be a dick, Slick managed to find himself in the middle of a gunfight between the Crew and the Felt. At this point, Snowman emerged, and Slick found himself having to fight the urge to shoot her as well. During her entrance into The Felt, Snowman had been granted an unusual ability: the end of her life would mean the end of the universe. As much as he loathed her, Slick was not willing to risk destroying the city he had painstakingly built out of nothing, and so he had no choice but to stand there like an idiot while Snowman stabbed him in the eye with her cigarette holder. Ouch.

BUT OH WELL. Spades Slick was not going to let a little something like a missing eye stop him from killing everything that moved. Also he got to keep Snowman's cigarette holder, so fuck you, bitch! He and the other Crew members battled their way to the vault at the end of the mansion, at which point they were attacked by Eggs, whose punches managed to knock Diamonds Droog into next week (literally) and Hearts Boxcars into next year (also literally). Seeing that the situation was quickly spiraling out of control, Spades Slick did what he does best: said FUCK YOU to the consequences and pried the safe open with a crowbar, triggering a massive temporal explosion that leveled the mansion, killing everyone around except himself and Snowman.

Slick proceeded to enter the vault, but before he could get past the scanner, he was attacked again by Snowman, who was apparently out to get her cigarette holder back. Slick dared her to do it, saying that she'd have to pry it out of his cold, dead hand.

She proceeded to wrap her whip around his arm, yank his arm off, and pry it out of his cold dead hand. With that, she warped away, having removed yet another of Slick's appendages (to say nothing of his pride).

On the plus side, however, the vault was finally fucking open, and Slick proceeded to enter. Inside the vault's depths lay a computer terminal, with a remarkably familiar troll boy on the screen...

Aaaaand that's where I'll be taking him from.

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lordsummer March 7 2011, 05:11:00 UTC
Personality: Spades Slick hates everything.

Well, that's not entirely true. There are a few things he doesn't hate: plain and serviceable hats, scottie dog candy, Terrier Fancy magazine, his fellow Midnight Crew members, and maybe, just maybe Karkat Vantas. These few items are, however, nothing but a few dry specks floating atop a sea of churning, bubbling loathing for just about everything and everyone. Spades Slick's status as a tightly packed ball of sheer rage and hate can be attributed not only to his programming as a Jack Noir, but also to his personal experiences and humiliations at the hands of Snowman, the trolls, and Sburb itself. Spades Slick believes he has been fucked over by the universe, and is hell-bent on fucking it right back.

The former agent has gone to great lengths to facilitate his image as a dark, brooding, sinister, shadowy villain, and to some measure he's succeeded! Fucking with the Midnight Crew is generally regarded to be a Very Bad Idea, thanks in no small part to Slick's hair-trigger temper and his extensive armory of bladed and blunt weapons. Keep in mind we're dealing with a guy who stabs his own allies just as a way of keeping in practice and/or saying hello. He's mean, he's brutal, he's relentless, he's badass, and he has no time for your shit.

That said he's also kind of an incredibly silly moron at times. Not unlike his predecessor, Problem Sleuth, Spades Slick is prone to bouts of sudden random insanity: when he first becomes playable during the Intermission, one of the first things he does is hop inside his own war chest and pretend it's a wagon. Later, Snowman spies him riding his cast-iron horse hitcher and pretending to joust with her cigarette holder/lance, to Slick's eternal shame. Slick is incredibly vain, taking extreme pride in his appearance and behavior as befitting a sinister mobster. There's no better way to piss Slick off really fast than by catching him doing something ridiculous.

Slick, see, detests all forms of perceived "silliness" (an attitude that seems to be carried by all Jack Noirs), instead stressing a "plain and serviceable" approach towards everything. This includes romance; Slick is utterly disgusted by the endless troll romance shenanigans, seeing love and all their other stupidass quadrants as a pointless waste of time. (Ignoring his own fairly obvious blackrom feelings for Snowman, of course.) He attempts on more than one occasion to spout off a witty one-liner after doing something cool, only to fail miserably and only managing to make himself angrier.

Subtlety is not Spades Slick's strong point. Enemy in the way? STAB HIM. Safe in the way? BLOW THAT SHIT UP. Finally broke into Doc Scratch's room only for him to start monologuing at you? IGNORE IT. WHACK HIM TO DEATH WITH HORSE HITCHER. Slick's method of problem-solving, simple though it may seem, is designed to get him from Point A to Point B in as short amount of time as possible, and proves ridiculously effective during the Intermission: he carves a path of destruction through the mansion by simply ignoring the time shenanigans and charging straight through The Felt.

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lordsummer March 7 2011, 05:11:36 UTC
The similarities to his kid-session counterpart are endless: they're both murderous maniacs with a deep loathing for ridiculous garments, for example. However, what sets Spades Slick apart from the new Jack Noir is that, impossible though it may seem, his successor is slightly more evil than he is. While the new Noir is basically a psychopathic unstoppable killing machine, Slick is not without a few Pet The Dog moments! Most of these tend to revolve around Karkat: although Slick claims to hate him and all his other troll buddies, he also comforts him when Sollux dies ("There, there, you blubbering goddamn pansy") and continues to help him even after being exiled and finding himself in the vault. Although Slick isn't above recklessly endangering the other Midnight Crew members (blowing up the safe, anyone?) it's also not unreasonable to assume that he sees them as more than just underlings by this point: they're the only ones who've stuck by him this whole time, which brings them closer than anyone else to being on the List Of People Spades Slick Does Not Hate (current population being zero).

And then, of course, there's the fact that Spades Slick is, well, kind of a dick. He's unbelievably petty, having taken his last name solely to piss off Snowman (it probably didn't work) and smashing the shit out of the clocks in the mansion just because they represent The Felt and their goddamn time shenanigans. He swears like a schoolyard bully and more often than not acts like one, which when combined with his murderous impulses generally makes him the absolute last person you would ever want to give omnipotent superpowers.

Yeeeeeeeah, that doesn't work out so hot later on down the line.

Abilities: Not nearly as much as his successor, but still a few! As a former citizen of Derse, Slick is not human, instead possessing a "shiny black carapace". He'll be humanized in Mayfield. Additionally, he and the other Midnight Crew members manage their inventories through the use of playing cards: Slick in particular keeps his items in his WAR CHEST. Basically it's hammerspace, but it'll need to be regained.

Sample Entry: Over here!

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ACCEPTED mayfield_mods March 16 2011, 04:22:02 UTC
Welcome to 1125 Taylor Road, Spades Slick! Please reply here with your character journal. Once you've done that, complete the following:

• Join mayfield_rpg, mayfield_logs, and optionally junefield
• Add your info to your canon post
• Update your friends list here, and comment to that post with your journal name.

And you're ready to go! Make sure to introduce yourself in the main comm and tell people where your character will be living!

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