Warning.
I thought I could live my life without pouring my heart out for the world to see, but I think I was wrong.
A couple of things have been grinding in my mind lately, and I want to tell people. I just don't know how.
Not that anyone ever reads this blog, but I just want it out. I dunno...
As some may know I've been on meds cause of my depression for about a year.
I wouldn't recommend these kinds of medications to anyone my age, unless it's acute.
It wasn't for me I don't think, and it made me worse for a period of time:
I never remember taking my pills, and forgetting them for about a week and them making the decision
to quit permanently made my mood drop dramatically.
I wanted to die, every day was a nightmare. I wanted to hide in my apartment forever.
Getting up in the morning was near impossible. I hated everyone for expecting things from me;
a visit, a phone call, a simple hello once a month. When someone annoyed me I could get so angry I swear
I could beat them up. I felt paralyzed. Once I came close to ending it all.
The reason I'm making my experience with anti-depressants official, is because I think far too many young
people today are offered medications for almost anything. And I'm telling you all:
DON'T DO IT.
It can make you feel better or at least neutral, but it can also make you far, far worse if you're somewhat
muddleheaded like me.
I feel better now, and I'm not on any meds anymore. I'm trying to return your calls and getting out more.
And to those of you who have had to deal with me these past years:
I'm sorry.