Probably the best meme I've ever read
1. If you were a goat would you do goat things or dip your horns in glitter glue and run around butting butts? I DO BELIEVE THAT DIPPING HORNS IN GLITTER GLUE IS REGULAR GOAT ACTIVITY. MY HORNS WOULD BE THE SPARKLIEST ANYONE HAS EVER SEEN AND I WOULD THEREFORE BE THE FINEST GOAT EVER. Also, goat is just a hilarious word.
2. Do doves cry? Probably, seeing as how they're symbols of peace in a world that measures time by wars.
3. Are you a never nude? I am nude precisely when I feel like it. Which happens to coincide with times when I'm alone in a room. With the blinds down.
4. Where do your boogers land? In the trash, after a long and arduous journey through the land of kleenex.
5. What colour should hippopotami be? Seeing as the proper plural of hippopotamus is hippopotamuses, I am going to imagine that a hippopotami is an extremely prestigious Brazilian military decoration. In which case, of course, the proper colours are navy blue cloth interwoven with silver threads and a gold medallion in the shape of an inverted seven-pointed star.
6. Would you rather face a monster wielding a plastic fork or a silver spoon? Silver spoon, definitely. First, a spoon makes a much better lever than a fork, a fact that is compounded by the fact that the metal is stronger. In a chase scenario, a lever could be more valuable than a weapon. Second, silver is a metal that has been renowned for magical properties for a while. Granted, that could cut both ways, but it's better than nothing. Third, silver's a pretty good conductor. If I need to short out some sort of electrical system in a heroic attempt to, say, drop a crane on the pursuing creatures from the depths of spaces beyond hell and twice as dark, it would be easier if I have a bunch of conducting material on me.
7. Do you tear holes in things or sew them up? I suck at sewing, but I try to make the effort on occasion; that said, I tend to be the one tearing holes in clothes. It's a pain in the ass.
8. Is pitch black a good or bad place to be? Because you can see nothing, your surroundings are anything you want them to be. Keep your thoughts happy and your world will be brilliant. But if, God help you, your thoughts should stray to a harsher place where shadows hide the ghosts of cruelties past and demons lurk in every kind of darkness, then fear will be what you find.
9. What wonderful thing about yourself do you have trouble accepting? That I fall in love too fast.
10. Would you rather be coated in cornflakes or underwear size stickers? Stickers. Less chance of rodents eating my flesh. Really not a fan of a Rats in the Walls style death.
11. What mustache are you? My own! I need no other, though it be in the process of regrowing.
12. Do ducks judge? Well, if they did, could you blame them? I mean, seriously. They are some seriously well-endowed waterfowl. Plus, they sound hilarious, so if they did judge you, you couldn't take them seriously.
13. Do you know of a nostril flare big enough to set up camp in? Indeed not. I don't spend my time staring at peoples noses.
14. Who is the shrine in your mind dedicated to? Marius. I mean, seriously, biggest badass in Roman History. Arguably responsible for the downfall of the Republic, but still a badass.
15. Are sharpie fights fun? Never had one, but I'd like to.
16. Are you sure you'll fall every time you sit within ten feet of a ledge? No, but I don't like standing and staring over edges. I become acutely aware of how unstable a bipedal form is.
17. Would you rather sit on a stool made of scones (slathered with jam and cream) or be bitch slapped by a really big eraser? I would sit on the stool of scones. That way, when I tell someone to kiss my ass, at least it will be delicious.
18. Do you find the way or follow the person who has? I follow the beaten path unless I can find a shortcut.
19. Do you run to or from hope? I try to keep myself tied to it with the strongest series of knots possible (I always need to re-tie them because they keep giving way under pressure).
20. Are you a triangle jammed into a rectangular hole? I'm not sure. I don't think the triangle knows what shape the hole is, just that it doesn't fit.
2. Do doves cry? Probably, seeing as how they're symbols of peace in a world that measures time by wars.
3. Are you a never nude? I am nude precisely when I feel like it. Which happens to coincide with times when I'm alone in a room. With the blinds down.
4. Where do your boogers land? In the trash, after a long and arduous journey through the land of kleenex.
5. What colour should hippopotami be? Seeing as the proper plural of hippopotamus is hippopotamuses, I am going to imagine that a hippopotami is an extremely prestigious Brazilian military decoration. In which case, of course, the proper colours are navy blue cloth interwoven with silver threads and a gold medallion in the shape of an inverted seven-pointed star.
6. Would you rather face a monster wielding a plastic fork or a silver spoon? Silver spoon, definitely. First, a spoon makes a much better lever than a fork, a fact that is compounded by the fact that the metal is stronger. In a chase scenario, a lever could be more valuable than a weapon. Second, silver is a metal that has been renowned for magical properties for a while. Granted, that could cut both ways, but it's better than nothing. Third, silver's a pretty good conductor. If I need to short out some sort of electrical system in a heroic attempt to, say, drop a crane on the pursuing creatures from the depths of spaces beyond hell and twice as dark, it would be easier if I have a bunch of conducting material on me.
7. Do you tear holes in things or sew them up? I suck at sewing, but I try to make the effort on occasion; that said, I tend to be the one tearing holes in clothes. It's a pain in the ass.
8. Is pitch black a good or bad place to be? Because you can see nothing, your surroundings are anything you want them to be. Keep your thoughts happy and your world will be brilliant. But if, God help you, your thoughts should stray to a harsher place where shadows hide the ghosts of cruelties past and demons lurk in every kind of darkness, then fear will be what you find.
9. What wonderful thing about yourself do you have trouble accepting? That I fall in love too fast.
10. Would you rather be coated in cornflakes or underwear size stickers? Stickers. Less chance of rodents eating my flesh. Really not a fan of a Rats in the Walls style death.
11. What mustache are you? My own! I need no other, though it be in the process of regrowing.
12. Do ducks judge? Well, if they did, could you blame them? I mean, seriously. They are some seriously well-endowed waterfowl. Plus, they sound hilarious, so if they did judge you, you couldn't take them seriously.
13. Do you know of a nostril flare big enough to set up camp in? Indeed not. I don't spend my time staring at peoples noses.
14. Who is the shrine in your mind dedicated to? Marius. I mean, seriously, biggest badass in Roman History. Arguably responsible for the downfall of the Republic, but still a badass.
15. Are sharpie fights fun? Never had one, but I'd like to.
16. Are you sure you'll fall every time you sit within ten feet of a ledge? No, but I don't like standing and staring over edges. I become acutely aware of how unstable a bipedal form is.
17. Would you rather sit on a stool made of scones (slathered with jam and cream) or be bitch slapped by a really big eraser? I would sit on the stool of scones. That way, when I tell someone to kiss my ass, at least it will be delicious.
18. Do you find the way or follow the person who has? I follow the beaten path unless I can find a shortcut.
19. Do you run to or from hope? I try to keep myself tied to it with the strongest series of knots possible (I always need to re-tie them because they keep giving way under pressure).
20. Are you a triangle jammed into a rectangular hole? I'm not sure. I don't think the triangle knows what shape the hole is, just that it doesn't fit.