"Mr. Mercedes" Season Two Reviews (Spoilers)
Also reviews for the latest episodes of DuckTales, and Big Hero 6: The Series, the series finale of Marvel's Spider-Man: Maximum Venom, the latest episodes of Lego Marvel Avengers, Power Rangers: Beast Morphers, and Genddy Tartakovsky's Primal, the first 5 episodes of Cosmos: Possible Worlds, and the latest episode of Fargo.
Mr. Mercedes "Missed You"
Season 1 was pretty much a straight adaptation of Mr. Mercedes, but it appears Season 2 and on are going to diverge from The Bill Hodges Trilogy from this point forward. I don't object. Finders Keepers is an interesting book in and of itself, but it doesn't have much else to do with the rest of the trilogy of the Bill Hodges characters. I think King made the book when he expected the Hodges books to have a longer run than they did, and recurring detectives often have adventures unrelated to everything else. But once the next book became about Brady Hartfield coming back while Bill was dying, and became the grand finale, Finders Keepers feels a bit out of place. I would not object to them either ignoring it or saving it for season 3.
I like the TV versions of Babineau and Cora much better than their book versions. They are not only more sympathetic and interesting, they are far sexier too (they aren't hooked up in the book). Isn't TV great?
Another huge divergence from the books is that Pete dies here. Granted, The Outsider is already off the table from this version of the characters, but that changes Holly's future arc entirely anyways.
I think the show has the most interesting soundtrack. What's also great is we tend to be allowed to hear the entire eclectic and soulful songs. It's a treat to listen to this show and hear many great songs I have never heard before.
The episode had an interesting scene that possibly King should have done himself. Although I have found King is a far more credible writer than the average TV writers, so that's probably why it didn't happen. But Bill comes THIS close to kill Brady when no-one is looking. It's treated as ethically right that he pulls back at the last second, but what's great is that readers of the book know it's a full-on mistake. King would not write that scene because it's not plausible Bill would be allowed alone with Brady, or be able to drop in unannounced. But just because TV doesn't really know how to do CREDIBLE drama, doesn't mean that non-credible stuff isn't INTERESTING drama. It's a trade-off. I confess I prefer King's grounded approach to storytelling. But that sure as heck was an interesting scene in and of itself here.
Good premiere. ****.
Mr. Mercedes "Let's Go Roaming"
Eh. Some things I'm not loving.
The Brady stuff is all right (although them turning so much of it sexual is icky) but I'm not happy about what they are doing with Jerome. Him having bad grades in college is something that is only happening because the season must be short and they need an extra complication. The book was very careful to portray Jerome's smarts and education as admirable.
On the one hand I think Jerome isn't cool for vaping. On the other, at least he never doesn't that embarrassing pickaninny voice Stephen King painfully saddled him with. But bonus demerits over the idea that he dress polices and slut-shames Barbara.
Not very happy with this episode. **1/2.
Mr. Mercedes "You Can Go Home Now"
So we're going straight into End Of Watch. I have no objection to this (although the timing of Bill's cancer might need to be changed. Maybe not though. It's hinted here he knows he's sick). I'm curious how that handheld game is going to fit into all of this.
Bill ex-wife never appeared in the book but she's a series regular here.
I love Bill's rage to Holly over the fact that their cases SUCK. And I especially love that when she agrees with him, she points out that they are equal partners and this is something he should have talked to her about instead. And it floors him and he's like "Fair enough." I love these two together.
I especially love how bad Holly is at the field stuff. She won't always be but it's totally in character that this should be a weak spot for her at this stage of the game. I found her a little TOO good at this right off the bat in the book.
For the record, Holly's love of movies and pop-culture should have come up already. She mentioned it once last season and it's been dropped. Outside of trying to quit smoking, it's her defining character trait, and how she makes comparisons to what is happening in her life. The Outsider also missed this part of her, but The Outsider's take was so out of character that didn't shock me. Here, they are actually trying to do right by her. And they can't as long as she isn't a movie nerd who references everything she can think of.
But I honestly really loved that episode. ****1/2.
Mr. Mercedes "Motherboard"
Lou is SUCH an easy character to sympathize and root for. I really prefer the show's version to the book's.
Mike Starr doesn't look anything like Al the Janitor does in my head, which is another good reason Stephen King rarely uses visual descriptions to pin down a character's appearance. It makes casting particularly easy.
I think Ida is Godsend to the show. I am about to say a very unkind thing about Stephen King. It is clear he loves Holly Gibney very much. But he treats her like a male writer would and that's not a compliment. He has Bill wish she would smile more because she's pretty when she does, and he has her think she can't live or function without Bill. Clearly in later stories, she can. But I would have adored it if King had had a second female character like Ida around to tell Holly that she doesn't need to depend on Bill or another man for her life to have meaning. At least King proves Holly's idea about that in the book wrong. But if he were writing the character in a progressive, feminist perspective (which I think is necessary for men writing complicated women characters) he would have had another woman tell her that long before Bill died.
Bill was great in the episode. I don't know if the writing has settled on this show or what, but he's written much more in character this season than he was in season 1. I was very unhappy with his temper and his tendency to lash out against characters who loved him and were trying to help him. He's much chiller this season. And there were three scenes (maybe three and a half) that got that point across.
I love him sort of delicately pointing out that he does need his space if Holly's gonna crash there, her saying he's hurting her feelings, and him gently saying he's hoping by saying this he'll spare them in the future. That was great. Bill never said that in the book but it's something he might have said if King had thought of it.
The second scene I love was Bill being completely unapologetic over Anton flipping his lid over seeing his Big Board. He's not the least bit embarrassed because he knows Anton won't believe him, and that's the reason he can't work with the cops about this at all. For the record, in the book, it's Holly who gets to the psychic connection with Brady first, and Bill spends a great deal of the climax as Dana Scully until he can no longer deny the obvious. They've sort of reversed the roles here. It works fine and I don't object. If they aren't going to give Holly her movie obsession, perhaps having a lack of imagination IS a fault the TV version of the character would possess. It's fine with me.
The third (or third and half) thing I loved was Bill's scenes with Sadie's mother. He's not particularly comforting, which was an interesting way portray that, but he's empathetic and gets that specific thing might not get the proper response. Instead he uses reason and tells as much of the truth as he is comfortable with while admitting he tell can't her everything. He is not consoling at all, but the way he is compassionate is that he is treating her and her daughter like real people, not random victims. He's offering real help and closure in a way nobody else is willing to. And God bless it, it totally works. We didn't see much of the Bill who was supposedly an amazing cop in season 1. I'm glad this season is getting to that finally.
So yeah, that was a pretty great episode. ****.
Mr. Mercedes "Andale"
Montez is pretty much a monster to everyone in the episode, and yet the second Brady uses Al to kill his dog, my sympathies are entirely with him and I look forward to his and Bill's team-up. It's weird how quickly my negative opinion was solidified by the first half of the episode, and completely changed by the second.
I love how unforgiving Holly is of Bill. That's actually reasonable and I love that he's not off the hook.
I don't like where things were left off with Maggie considering the limb Bill made her climb out on here. He cunningly claimed to her she was being groomed to be a patsy whenever Babineau eventually went down (cunning especially because that actually seems likely and true) and said she could use a friend. The fact that he didn't go to her by the end of the episode says the friend isn't him. And as far as using friends go, that's entirely one-sided in his favor. They could fix this in the next episode or two but that is literally something that needed to be addressed immediately. Because as of now, I think Bill's a heel.
I liked some of it and I disliked some of it. ***1/2.
Mr. Mercedes "Proximity"
I love Bill and Ida together. That is all.
Fred the Tortoise is the weirdest thing David E Kelley added to the franchise by a longshot.
I have changed my mind about this show's portrayal of Jerome. While I still love King's untroubled positive version, what I love about the troubles Jerome has on this show is that they are real and understandable for a black man in his circumstances. There is something to be said about King's optimistic view of that character's future. But the reality of what that person would experience in America in the late 2010's is probably MUCH closer to this show's idea. America is even more currently fudged up than when King originally conceived his story about a racist, psychopathic, mass murdering serial killer. Sad but true.
I'm a little bit sick of Cora already. Felix is like "I'm you're husband!" And Cora sucks because she is dumb enough to believe "They are my employer!" is the winning response to that. I totally agree with him flipping out over that, and realizing this is not the person he was led to believe he had married. That was some righteous rage right there.
The show is trying to show Cora is unfathomably corrupt for not being willing to entertain the idea that Bill's motivation is altruism. Instead I think she's dumb. Even if she's right (and she's not, and that's a dumb, untrue opinion that would cross the lips of a misanthropic sociopath like Gregory House) he IS the best shot they've got of "waking" Brady. If Cora were actually clever, and still believed that stupid sociopathic thing, she would still use Bill while their interests aligned. It's not like he already doesn't know the full story. He basically gave the store away in revealing what he learned about her and the Chinese. In fact, with what he DOES know, her smartest and safest play IS in fact keeping him close. The show is trying to show Cora's personality defect is an unwillingness to believe there is good in people. Instead I think her character defect is that she is too stupid and paranoid to use a gift horse to her best advantage when it is offered.
Maggie is still feeding information to Bill? That woman is a saint. And I don't find that credible at all.
Part of that episode annoyed me, but I like this version of Jerome for the first time ever. ***1/2.
Mr. Mercedes "Fell On Black Days"
I found Mike Starr's breakdown near the beginning of the episode thoroughly unconvincing. It actually bordered on laughable. He did a much better job when Library Al was possessed by Brady.
Good for Ida for getting some. She can't wait around for Bill forever.
I liked the scene between Babineau and Lou.
My favorite thing in the episode occurred near the end. It was the decision to shift Brady's perspective entirely into his headspace imagining himself as a boxer while seeing tense scenes of Bill, Holly, and Donna entering their homes and workplaces unawares. It suddenly (and alarmingly) makes the audience realize that Brady could be the last place we want him to be. Very clever narrative choice there. It played exactly like a horror movie. As it should have.
The idea of the doctor being reluctant to move Brady because he's good for business is the futility of authority in horror movies in a nutshell. The heroes absolutely know the truth about what Brady is doing, and how he's doing it. And it doesn't matter while the people in charge are profiting from the monster instead. It's a perfect horror movie moral, fitting because this episode was the one most like a horror movie.
Bad things about the episode? It is not remotely plausible Holly has never heard the expression "Across the pond". She's Asperger's, not stupid. That is not a case of taking something literally. It's an expression someone who is supposed to be as well-versed in cinema as she is would know intimately by how often it is used in movies and TV shows. Nice try, show. But just because Holly can't read people or understand sarcasm doesn't mean she doesn't speak English. The producers might do well to remember that in the future.
Al's breakdown's and Holly out-of-character dumbness notwithstanding, that was a pretty solid episode. ***1/2.
Mr. Mercedes "Nobody Puts Brady In A Crestmore"
The escape at the end was great, because it was not something Brady was ever able to manage in the book, so it was quite unexpected.
I think Jerome's father is being ridiculous with the groceries. Example of toxic masculinity overthinking the littlest and most insignificant thing. It's tiresome. And frankly outside of Jerome's parents in the books.
While I suppose most viewers will find the way Holly forces her Aspie crush into a date with her cute, I like that fact that in the books, for whatever unknown reason, she doesn't date. It mystifies Barbara and Jerome in "If It Bleeds" and the fact that we are never given a solid reason for why not is a pretty cool mystery. I don't like the show messing with that specific idea. It's not as egregious as Holly kissing strangers in HBO's version of The Outsider. But it bugs me a little for the same reason.
Brady's psychic stuff in the book was entirely unproven and only known to Bill, Holly, and Jerome. The fact that this notion seems to have gained currency with much of the rest of the cast suggests that when this is all over, whichever of Babineau's enablers survive Hartfield's insanity, means there will probably be accountability for this, which was annoyingly absent in the book.
If they weren't able to get back Kelly Lynch, they shouldn't have brought back Brady's mother at ALL at the end. Honestly, that was so freaking awkward. Even worse than Buffy's "appearance" in Angel's "The Girl In Question".
I also am getting a better feel for season 3. If I'm not mistaken (and I could be) Finders Keepers will simply be ignored or made an insignificant subplot. What I think Season 3 is gonna be is Brady's mass suicide plot. He's already got an advantage because he's escaped from the hospital, but the fact that he's done that makes me wonder how and why he'll be able to do that and what if any part the Zap Its and Fishin Hole will play. I feel like this season is the first half of End Of Watch, and the third and final season will be the second half. We'll see. They could disappoint me and wrap this up in two episodes instead, but I very much doubt it. There is STILL a ton of awesome psychic stuff from the book they can play with and pretty much HAVE to get to to be considered a successful adaptation.
Pretty great episode. ****1/2.
Mr. Mercedes "Walk Like A Man"
That blew. I was very, very, VERY unhappy by the end of that. Ironically I enjoyed maybe the first three quarters of the episode. But the episode is not only getting a failing grade for the last fifteen minutes, it's getting the lowest failing grade possible.
I'll talk the parts I liked in a little bit, not because I want to leave the review on a positive note (which is usually why I talk about good stuff second) but because the bulk of the review will be on the show's failings and I don't want to get too off-point from that until I've said everything. Perhaps that means I should talk about the good things first. But this episode's weaknesses are something I feel the need to dive right into.
Let me offer the cruelest insult I could ever give this show or any other show: It feels like it was written by David E Kelley. Ironically it WAS, but so were a couple of other early episodes, including the Pilot, and he was very light on his insufferable gimmicks there. The Practice also got more ludicrous as it went along, but I had hoped Kelley had simply stepped back on his role on this series, and just would never write another episode again. And the fact that he's still on the writing staff, if not a showrunner, is going to be a HUGE problem if he's hired to write pivotal episodes like this. Kelley has cruel knack for taking a show with a good premise and absolutely destroying every last aspect of it. Once that is taken care of, he often fires half the cast. And once that happens, he leaves the show, and puts it in the hands of other writers who aren't invested in it to salvage the corpse, and it limps along until it is invariably canceled. That's his M.O., and he is one of the most destructive producers working in Hollywood, with absolutely NO loyalty to his actors or his writing staff. Killed off cast members of The Walking Dead were treated better and more respectfully when they were written out of that show. And that's not even getting into his toxic misogyny and homophobia. He is bad for television, and this episode was everything I feared this show would be when I heard he developed it.
This was aired in 2018, and before George Floyd, but I want to point out that even if it hadn't been, the idea behind Bill being in trouble for assaulting Brady in the hospital is ludicrous. To be absolutely 100% fair, Bill suggests to Holly he might get heat solely because he isn't a cop anymore, and he could be considered a good fall guy. But cops in our Universe don't even get charged for murdering innocent unarmed people. That's why the Black Lives Matters protests exist. In reality, Bill almost killing somebody as horrible as Brady is the kind of thing the public would want to pin a medal on him for. People in the media interviewing people who thought Brady was gentle and human is wrong too. I get that Kyle Rittenhouse got some benefit from that because the world we live in is horrible, but Brady did not kill left-wing protesters. He killed non-political people EVERYONE considered innocent, including a mother and her baby. Even if there were people willing to bothsides that idea, the media itself would not be interviewing them. The media would be out for blood and would actually be right to be so. Nancy Grace would be having a field day. They wouldn't be interviewing the idiot proprietor of the local five and dime with stars in his eyes over the fact that Brady didn't maliciously murder her when he had the chance.
This boils down to Kelley's biggest flaw, and it's something that drives me nuts, and it appalls me because critics cannot recognize it for what it is, and hand him a pile of Emmys for it instead. Kelley is a dishonest storyteller. Every story he tells is a lie as far as what the human experience really is. He doesn't understand people, and if he does, he lies about what they would and wouldn't do in any situation to suit his own agenda. He makes characters do random things that are not believable to service a story that is not credible. When Brady and Bill end the episode in the prison cell together I realized for the first time this IS actually a David E Kelley show. He thinks so little of his audience he thinks we'd believe the cops would ever do that. And the sickest, most depressing thing is, that based on the Emmys he's gotten for Picket Fences, Ally McBeal, and The Practice, all far worse shows than this as far as credibility goes, he's not wrong. Maybe I can say he's misjudging the taste of the average TV viewer in 2018. But he sure as h*ll pulled the wool over the eyes of a LOT of critics and people who gave out awards during his heyday. David E Kelley and Diane English doing so well at the Emmys is why I think it's a worthless honor. The People's Choice Award has more weight in my eyes because we aren't told to take it seriously. Why would Breaking Bad tout an Emmy win to begin with? The groundbreaking shows that have lost at the Emmys (or have never even been nominated) are a LOT more respectable company for Vince Gilligan than David E Kelley and his overpraised ilk.
I promised to talk about a couple of good things. The notion of Brady begging Cora for a kiss was an equal level of revulsion and wish fulfillment for the audience. I don't EVER want it to happen, and I simultaneously want it to happen more than anything I've ever wanted in my entire life before it does. What tips the scales away from the ickiness is Brady using the argument to Cora that it would sell a lot of books. Anyone who can correctly read the prostitution level of a PR person deserved that kiss. No matter how repulsive they are. Case closed.
The other good thing is something I've ruminated a bit about as I was writing this review, and I must unhappily couch my praise as not necessarily being a good thing. I did not believe Brady's remorse in the slightest. Why? Because it would be narrative malpractice to do that after all this. I liked it because I reasoned no writer would be stupid enough to do that. And I realize we are ultimately entering a courtroom phase for the story (which did not exist in the book) which makes me ask: "David E Kelley, please stand. On the charge of being an insufferable hack who commits narrative malpractice on a weekly basis, and destroys every show he's ever created, has the jury reached a verdict? What say you?"*
Basically it is suicide for the show and the characters Stephen King came up with, and spent three (and more) books exploring. But David E Kelley is perfectly at home killing his shows, and forcing other producers to try (and fail) to clean up the disastrous messes he's left in his wake. I liked the idea as it was happening because it suggested a great master plan on Brady's end. That's still possible, but once the episode ended with him and Bill in a cell together, it's not the sure thing it would be on a competent and honest show either. Kelley could be legitimately setting up an ethical courtroom controversy at the expense of Stephen King and the characters. I would never put something like that past that utter lout.
I'm tired of television being ruined by people like David E Kelley. Most people have seen through him at this point, but I'm upset he gained enough unearned credibility earlier in his career to still be allowed to ruin television today. It bums me out. 0.
*I TOLD you I hate David E Kelley. Me referencing the idiotic "What say you?" proves it.
Mr. Mercedes "Fade To Blue"
Shark. Jumped.
I watch a lot of television. I watch a lot of good television. I watch a lot of great television. I also watch a lot of bad television. I am loathe to give up a show once I've started it. Dropping a show is a last resort. I have not dropped this show. But the fact that I do watch so much television that is good and bad has led me to come up with my own truism. A Matt Zimmerism, if you would. And it is this: Every single good, and even GREAT television show is two horrible episodes in a row away from being a terrible television show. An irredeemably terrible television series that can never recover or regain what used to be good about it. You can have a horrible episode occasionally on a good show. Two in a row is not necessarily a deal-breaker for every show either. But the thing that causes the irredeemable shark jump usually winds up simply being two horrible episodes in a row with bad story decisions. It only takes two episodes to utterly destroy a show and the viewer's trust in it. And it can happen to ANY great show if the writer isn't careful. It could have happened to Breaking Bad and The Wire if the writers didn't know what they were doing instead.
Mr. Mercedes just had those two episodes. It can't come back from this. I'll watch Season 3. I might even like an episode or two. But I'll never like or enjoy the show as a whole again. It is permanently ruined. Which is utterly in character for David E Kelley and describes everything he has ever written.
This was a LONG episode and for two separate (and understandable) reasons I wanted it to be over. The first reason was simple: It was a terrible episode, and it actually pained me having to sit through and watch something that bad the entire way through. I get mad at TV shows I watch all the time. But the longing in my brain for something I was watching to simply be over because it was so embarrassingly bad is a rare feeling. A lot of times I enjoy watching bad television because I know I'll wring some great reviews out of it. And I love psychologically deconstructing utter cr*p in the way my reviews do. But the last time I was like "This is so bad I am having trouble sitting still and watching this," was the animated movie Superman: Brainiac Attacks. To be honest, I have felt this feeling this strongly one more time since then. I felt it during the series premiere of the short-lived American version of Prime Suspect. But in that case I didn't make it and shut it off after 15 minutes. And to be fair, there are dumb sitcoms and cartoons that are like nails on a chalkboard to me, and I immediately change the channel when they come on: I'm talking Saved By The Bell, Johnny Test, Ed, Edd, and Eddy, Pac-Man And The Ghostly Adventures, Xavier: Renegade Angel, Robot Chicken, and every single Disney Channel and Nickelodeon kidcom that ever existed. But those are shows that annoy me whenever they pop up in the background. I rarely if ever feel this level of suck for something I actually sit down and try to watch.
The second reason I wanted it to be over is because I knew I had to utterly destroy that. And I knew that after 15 minutes, and I felt annoyed at having to watch 45 additional minutes of David E Kelley masturbative courtroom nonsense to write what I already could tell you early on. It wouldn't be fair to review and destroy the episode without having done that, so I actually NEEDED to see every inch of that trainwreck. And if anything it got worse and worse as it went along. And I wanted to do it NOW.
Kelley has a knack for lying to audiences about how the world operates. He was supposedly at one point a lawyer. If so he's also a liar. He has fictional "legal experts" on television here saying that Brady's defense (that he's a new rebooted person and shouldn't have to pay for the crimes when he was crazier) is a valid one. It's not. Kelley actually knows that and just lied to you. To your face. If Brady is conflicted and confused after committing the crimes in OUR Universe, too bad, so sad, he's still getting the chair. No judge would ever entertain a notion that crazy as his defense lawyer's here. Over the years I had been unpleasantly led to believe that David E Kelley is a stupid person. A smart person should not be writing scripts this bad. And I came to a possibly worse explanation as his output wore on. He might not actually be this stupid. He just believes you are. And the Emmy voters proved him right during every contest that mattered during the 1990's. And that utterly sickens me.
And how dare he after this torturous season for poor Lou, the ONE great character on the show, unendingly suffering this year, that he put her in legal jeopardy for doing what Holly, Bill, and Jerome were allowed to do in the book without consequence? Yes, Holly, Bill, and Jerome were in actual mortal peril while Brady was possessing Babineau's body in the book. But why wasn't Lou granted that excuse? Why did Kelley make Hartsfield's remorse a controversy up for debate, and put her in that moral position? It's absolutely obscene on every level. If there is a second thing Kelley will always do in his shows besides lie and manipulative the audience, it mistreats the women on the show, especially if they are women the audience actually cares about. I'm trying to think of a word for that level of sickness woven into the level of his writing output. "Pathological" comes the closest to expressing my disgust, but it also doesn't feel strong enough considering the amount of times he's done this. And he has shelves full of Emmys. And David Lynch and Joss Whedon have none. Joss Whedon is problematic for his own reasons, but there is no denying he was robbed of Emmys for his earlier career before he went off the rails.
Also what was the point of the psychic control plotline if it was going to lead to THIS? Kelley not only is famous for firing actors who no longer interest him, but abandoning entire plots and concepts once he is bored with them. In "On Writing" Stephen King argues that it's often good if a writer doesn't know where the story is going, and that not knowing can lead them in pleasantly surprising directions and unexpected endings. King's entire output is a good argument in favor of that notion. Kelley's entire output is really the only rebuttal someone who disagrees with King would ever need. I'm curious what he must have thought about that idea leading to THIS on a show based on his books (and one that he has a vanity show producing credit on to boot). Oh, well. Uncle Stevie STILL gets to cash the check. The only ones out of luck over his partnership with Kelley are the Constant Readers, and the viewers. But King gets paid, so water under the bridge, am I right?
Also, did they expect me NOT to notice that there were no cell bars between Bill and Brady at the end of the last episode, and they have conveniently popped up at the beginning of this one? Do you know who was unhappy with this development? Annie Wilkes. Girl stood up in the theater over that and raged her truth to everyone listening. I won't chop off anyone's foot for it, but I am also not as unobservant as Kelly thinks I am.
I'm annoyed Jerome and Holly were barely in these past two episodes. They have absolutely nothing to do with the end of Brady Hartsfield, which is an absolutely insane storytelling decision. Holly not being granted a final confrontation with him is especially unforgivable.
I am angry. I am spent. I am sad. I am unsurprised. One thing television critics who loved Kelley's stuff in the 1990's would always call his craziest and least credible scenes was "Classic David E Kelley". What none of them saying that understood at the time was that that was an insult of the highest order. This episode was Classic David E Kelley. And television and my brain are worse for it (and him) existing. 0.
DuckTales "Escape From The ImpossiBin!"
Man, that was absolutely tiresome. I was fed up by the end of that. It's the cheeky, yet melodramatic tone that absolutely infuriates me. What if the Uncle Scrooge comics were written by someone as insufferable as David E Kelley? This was not a thing I needed to know how it would turn out. Ugh.
Do you know what bugs me most? The episode isn't entirely worthless. There were some individual elements I thought were neat. The show is so bad it doesn't even allow me to hate it as much as I should and it deserves. It having definite selling points is one of the most annoying things about it. It would easier to dismiss entirely if it did everything wrong.
Basically the whole "Family is everything", "We Ducks can never be defeated", "You always have to be on your guard", these are all things that cause me to stress-eat. Also annoying and a bit alarming are the times the Ducks refer to Bradford as a carrion eater, and use other insults based on the fact that he's a vulture. That is an explicit Duck comic no-no. Not only should the Duck treats themselves and everyone in the cast as regular people, slamming Bradford for explicitly being a vulture is outright racist. It's utterly wrong for not only violating the rules the comics set up, but making the rules THIS show has set up seem utterly vulgar.
Let's get to the few things I liked. Two of those involved Donald. I like the idea that Donald could credibly be confused with being the resident tough adventurer who has never lost a fight, and I like that Donald is given his comic book role as the voice of reason at the end (which came a bit too little too late if you ask me). I also thought the solution out of the original gravity trap was brilliant and filled with clever and genius visuals. Not a ton of "action sequences" on the show I like. I liked that one specifically because the Ducks got through it using their heads like they are supposed to.
I want to give that zero stars and write off the show and never watch it again. But the fact that the show isn't PERFECTLY awful means I would never be able to justify doing that to anyone who reads my reviews. It's not very often I wish a show was worse than it was. And the sad truth is that this show would have to be a LOT worse than it is currently for me to actually drop it. That's messed up, right? **1/2.
Big Hero 6: The Series "Cobra And Mongoose / Better Off Fred"
Cobra And Mongoose:
Minimax continues to be adorable (and with the best catchphrases).
The episode felt pretty jam-packed, which considering the 11 minute runtime is a compliment. ****1/2.
Better Of Fred:
That contained more romance in 11 minutes than Jeph Loeb's entire cartoon output at Marvel Television.
Supersonic Stu's dad's name was Supersonic Stupid? I am not surprised at all, and yet that strikes me as really sad at the same time.
Do you know what wasn't? I always love how supportive and loving Sue is of her grandson.
The animation in the fantasy sequences at the beginning was great.
That was cute. Fred usually isn't, so I'm pleased. ****.
Episode Overall: ****1/2.
Marvel's Spider-Man: Maximum Venom "Maximum Venom"
Let's just say I'm ready to move on from the Jeph Loeb / Marvel Television / Man Of Action stuff. That's all I really have to say.
What? You demand a further review beyond that? Fine.
Passable. Acceptable. And that doesn't pass muster and is UNacceptable to me. No, it is not the trainwreck Black Panther's Quest wound up as, but I don't think demanding a great last episode from an action cartoon is asking for the moon either. Better than Avengers Assemble is no kind of bar in a Universe that's designed properly. I'm talking about OUR Universe by the way. There is no part of the Jeph Loeb-era Marvel Cartoon Universe that is remotely designed properly.
Ugh. The Avengers. I could have died happy never seeing the Avengers Assemble version of the Avengers ever again. Those characters are so annoying. So much so that they annoyed me in an entirely new way, which is SO them. Have you noticed that Hulk appeared more in this episode than he did during the entire fifth season? Yeah. THAT is the design of Jeph Loeb's Marvel Cartoon Universe. And it sucks.
And hearing Peter say all of these wonderful and moving empowering words of encouragement to Max Modell and how much he means to him actually made me mad. Because before this brief six-episode season, Max was a pretty unambiguously despicable character who treated Peter terribly on every level. I don't like the show retconning his terrible actions in the last episode as if he's been a friend and mentor to Peter this entire time. Not even close. He's basically been using Peter in the first two seasons, profiting from his inventions, while refusing to offer him a scholarship to the school despite Peter earning him money hand over fist. And Peter is desperately poor and can't afford the tuition on his own, while Max is constantly harassing him to pay it on-screen. Max was basically running this poor kid ragged for the "privilege" of creating inventions for him and making him rich. I am NOT okay with Peter telling Max what a good person he is. He's a turd.
Ironically, I wouldn't actually object if Peter was merely jiving Max simply to get him to throw off the Symbiote. He doesn't have to MEAN that Max is great if it gets the job done and saves the day. But the moment is played as if Peter is being entirely sincere instead, which is beyond irritating.
Grady not knowing they are all Spiders feels like the stupidest of loose ends. What kills me is it could have been fixed with one line of dialogue and a reaction shot from Grady. It's the last episode. It changes nothing. Instead I feel like Grady is going into this new enterprise at a disadvantage from everyone else, (which is an icky feeling) and with his eyes entirely closed from the truth. And wasn't it Harry himself who always ragged on Peter for this exact same kind of thing? Why is he participating in this dishonesty instead? Ugh. Unnecessary, man.
I noticed two things about the special effects in the climax: First, that they were great, and second, that maybe the show shouldn't get a TON of credit for that. Because this show is clearly done on the dirt cheap, and if great effects are actually affordable and easy to do, it's literally the least they can do. I would actually settle for passable effects and a great story instead. But this is how Loeb's Marvel Cartoon Universe is actually designed, and I don't ever get what I want from it.
And I'm not EVER calling this or the other recent shows an "Animated Universe". Cartoon Universe is all it gets. "Animated Universe" suggests of prestige and effort with continuity none of these show have bothered to put in any work toward. It's an insult to the stuff done by Bruce Timm and Greg Weisman to pretend this is any sort of continuity at ALL. It's random cartoon nonsense on its best day.
Still, I'll give them points for not only explaining the season subtitle, but having it make a lick of sense. What did the Sinister 6 actually have to do with Ultimate Spider-Man's last season anyways?
Am I correct in thinking that the reason this season existed at ALL was to capitalize on the surprise success of the Venom movie? If that's so, am I crazy to wonder why Eddie Brock didn't appear once? Is it even MORE unreasonable to wonder why he was never even mentioned? I get Venom is Sony, but Marvel is usually better at synergy, and if they wanted to bask in Venom's success, they could at least give Sony their due and not ignore everything they did, including using Brock.
I feel like this review is harsher than I actually feel towards the episode. The episode was acceptable, especially by the standards of the rest of the Loeb cartoons. But I'm tired of settling for acceptable and acting like that is okay in 2020. It's totally not. I'll be giving this a healthy three and a half stars served with a fresh helping of Michelle Obama-level shade and side-eye. It's pretty much what the episode and the entire series has deserved. And that's ALL it's deserved if you ask me. ***1/2.
LEGO Marvel Avengers: Climate Conundrum "Friends And Foes: Part 3: Red Skull's Revenge"
I like Hulk and Cap on the motorcycle doing their own version of the Fastball Special.
I like that Hammer tries to turn on Red Skull when learning the extent of his evil plan.
The airbag joke with the AIM soldier was funny.
Pretty good. ***1/2.
LEGO Marvel Avengers: Climate Conundrum "Wild Weather: Part 1: Desert Debacle"
All right, but nothing special. ***.
Power Rangers Beast Morphers "Grid Connection"
Only here for Jason, so that's mostly what I'll talk about.
Austin St. John took off a lot of the weight he put on after he retired from acting for this appearance. Not all of it by a longshot. He's still hefty. But what surprises me more than anything is that Jason is like, OLD now. Whenever Jason David Frank shows up as Tommy he's got the wrinkles around his eyes, and often a cheesy goatee to boot, but the truth is, he still has a youthful look and demeanor. St. John is middle-aged with a middle-aged guy's raspy voice, and it's very interesting (and a little personally depressing at the same time.)
Can I just say I actually really like the idea that St. John wasn't able to shed ALL the weight? I think we have been overdue for a plus-sized Ranger, (especially considering the fat shaming this show does even to this day), and who could they possibly do better for that than one of the most beloved Rangers of all time? I will not sneer at St. John for his metabolism slowing down as he grew older. It might be about time for the show to prove that heroes can come in all shapes and body types. I remember what a major win it was that the original series made the Blue Ranger a nerd outcast with glasses. The show wound up doing very wrong by Billy and David Yost in the end, but I think they did right by Jason being heavy here.
I thought the evil six-headed Zord was kind of cool, and obviously overpowered, because by all rights there is no way those four good guy Megazords could have blown up something that huge. But Power Rangers has always believed in ending their episodes with "The good guys win just because" so it's not out of character for the franchise.
I am a little leery of the moral that Devon should have taken Keeper's warning seriously. Is that the message we're teaching kids now? Always listen to fortune-tellers instead of your own common sense? Because I don't think that's a good moral at all for the real toddlers watching the show.
The news that a reboot is coming is making me rethink not watching next season. Because if Dino Fury winds up the last show in the original continuity, they might have some interesting guest appearances in store as this era of the franchise winds up for good. My dream is Jason, Tommy, and Kimberly (The Trinity) reunited in the series finale. I haven't made a decision to watch Dino Fury for sure, but I'm also not sure to check out like I was planning to before this week's reboot announcement.
I'm a little confused about how the Mighty Morphin Rangers are still active when going by the show history they all retired, or handed off their powers to the next generation. Trini is actually in all likelihood DEAD, so the Yellow Ranger being there was another open question. Similarly, didn't the Dino Charge Rangers give up their powers in their last episode too? The Dinosaurs being present in this episode suggests this takes place after the Dino Charge finale. So when did they get the Energems back?
I utterly lost interest in the franchise when Jason, then Kimberly, then Tommy left. To me, those guys WERE the show, and I don't really see the appeal of different Ranger incarnations. I basically have been watching the later Nickelodeon seasons in the hope to see some of the earlier Rangers and characters from that era show up. I think Beast Morphers is a weak season, but I like that it's the one that gave us hefty, middle-aged Jason. I'll remember it fondly for that alone. ****1/2.
Genddy Tartakovsky's Primal "The Night Feeder"
Here's an opinion about the show I've never heard anyone else bring up yet: This show has the scariest sound effects I have ever heard. The visuals in the episode didn't give up much, but I could close my eyes during the entire thing and still pee my pants.
I feared the worst from the Night Feeder. The absolute worst. I expected it to be the worst possible thing it could possibly be. And I thanked God that it was a just supernaturally fast, horrible raptor Spear had no business believably killing. Do you know what I worried the Night Feeder was?
Another T-Rex. Of the opposite sex. Fang's behavior at the beginning of not wanting Spear to react to the ruckus of the Triceratops slaughter had me fearing the worst. Could you imagine how bad that would be? For both Spear and Fang? Spear and Fang's only advantage is each other, and another T-Rex would wreck that quick. I was very glad this episode was far less terrifying than my worst imagination feared it to be.
It's not like I'll be able to sleep tonight after hearing those sound effects anyways. ****.
Cosmos: Possible Worlds "Ladder To The Stars"
That was totally cheesy. And I loved every inch of it.
The music and visual effects in this franchise continue to astound me. It makes whatever cheesy thing is happening magical instead.
Lot of interesting things to learn here.
My biggest takeaways were learning that as a species of hunter / gatherers, human beings used to be able to get along and live in peace with each other just fine. Even after the agricultural revolution, humans remained so and the first generations of that society were egalitarian. Neil DeGrasse Tyson is smart to point that out because it tells us something that we had been led to believe the opposite about: The violence and darkness we see in the world was not necessarily a part of human nature this entire time. It probably wasn't even necessary had our societies made better choices. People used to live together as equals with no problems, before and after they plowed the land and built homes for themselves. It's the war and the fighting that is unnatural and the learned behavior. It's not an intrinsic facet to our species. I did not know that, and I feel better for knowing that. One of the selling points of this show is that I usually feel better about the world than I did before I saw a given episode because I learn positive things about the world I didn't know. And that's awesome.
The idea of Spinoza's controversial beliefs and writing, and his subsequent shunning turns the show overtly political in describing the fact that this was before the American values of democracy and freedom of ideas were fully established. It's a good way to say that the current intolerance and hatred we are suffering through is similar to what people had to suffer in the Age of Enlightenment. It also suggests we might come out of it okay.
We need to treat bees better. The return to the Hall of Extinction did not make me happy and Tyson did not look happy revisiting it either, particularly since between the show's brief hiatus and now, we have learned a great deal about our place in it in the meantime. The show isn't always entirely good news.
Very cool idea for the relay station to Alpha Centauri. I also learn neat stuff on this show.
They shortened the long theme song a bit. I prefer the longer one.
Whatever the problems Tyson was having in his personal life that caused the show to be postponed, I AM glad it's back. ****1/2.
Cosmos: Possible Worlds "Shadows Of Forgotten Ancestors"
I was not feeling this at all. And I think my problem is best exemplified by Tyson's admiring telling of the story of Ashoka. Here's an opinion: Ashoka sucked. Period. There are plenty of heroes throughout history who performed their good deeds without committing mass torture and genocide and killing their entire families first. I don't find the story of Ashoka about wisdom gained and redemption earned. I find it about justice escaped. There are some things that are simply should NOT be allowed to stand. Ashoka's rule after all of the evil things he did was one of them.
There were a lot of provocative images and notions in the episode including the idea that the kind of "us versus them" mentality leads to demagogues and supremacy. It's basically failed pattern recognition.
However, Tyson said there really wasn't a single thing humans did that you couldn't find in the animal kingdom. I thought of several, and that fact that he didn't mention them means there probably aren't any animals who can do these things. But only humans wear clothing, drive motorized vehicles, harness electricity, mass produce constructed products and inventions, and create fire. And that's just off the top of my head. I'm not saying human are special among Earth species. But a LOT of single Earth species have a talent only they possess, and that doesn't detract from how cool the talent is.
Speaking of which, the biggest laugh of the episode was Tyson's line about male fireflies' "glow-blocking". "Man, that's cold." Frankly, Neil, as far as sinister behavior goes, it's not ever going to top the first part of Ashoka's reign. But point taken, and funny one-liner appreciated. Carl Sagan never really did those.
Still, not my favorite episode. **1/2.
Cosmos: Possible Worlds "Lost City Of Life"
That Cosmic Calendar really makes it easier to keep things straight on this show.
I loved the story of how Goldschmidt constantly outwitted the Nazis in WWII. Riveting.
The stuff inside the water filled Saturn moon was wondrous.
I love that this show often gets Patrick Stewart to do voice work as some of the cartoon characters.
Great episode. ****1/2.
Cosmos: Possible Worlds "Vavilov"
That was amazing. I learned so much about history. Stalin and Lisenko were truly bad guys. It says how dull-witted Stalin actually was when Hitler was smarter than him about seeing the value of the seed bank. I never even heard of the seed bank before and I now learned that it probably saved my life. Amazing.
The different animation styles were great but the stop-motion sequences in Russia were truly stunning.
Seth MacFarlane's voice cameo as the Russian film-reel announcer was both funny and vaguely offensive.
I loved every second of this. *****.
Cosmos: Possible Worlds "The Cosmic Connectome"
That gave me a lot to think about.
Neil DeGrasse Tyson expressed an interesting opinion that I don't agree with. He mentioned that as bad as bigotry was in the past, since it was systemic throughout past society, misguided people like Broca perhaps should be forgiven for it. I don't agree with that, but he raised an interesting argument: Maybe a hundred years from now there will be beliefs that I currently have that are considered unforgivable by a future, more enlightened society. I think that's interesting to think about, and I can think of a couple of bad things society currently engages in that get little pushback (but that should). The first is killing animals. I expect that within fifty years science we'll be able to come up with alternate food sources that give the same great taste that meat does artificially. I think the Impossible Whopper is just the beginning. Therefore, I expect in a couple of generations people will question my barbarism of eating meat now. I also expect that the fact that segments of our society mercilessly mock and make fun of stupid people will also be frowned upon centuries from now (if those stupid people don't wind up getting us all killed before then). But those future evolved societies can go to Hell for thinking less of me for that because they probably won't have to live with them.
But do you notice the similarity both of those things have in common? There are people alive NOW, against, and in the case of killing animals, strongly, those practices. Just like even when racism was endemic in society, there were people who stood against it. Very few, but it's not like they didn't exist. What that tells me is that people back then don't get a free pass. Right is right and wrong is wrong no matter when it happens. Similarly, if a future society feels superior enough to look down on me for eating meat or making fun of dumb people, that's okay, because on some level I know I shouldn't be doing those things. Also, Tyson neglects to mention that those "unforgivable" bigotries are very much currently acceptable to a LARGE segment of society in 2020. I would argue that in the last four years they have actually come back in fashion. The reason I don't give past societies a pass on systemic racism is because systemic racist still very much exists, and is in fact entrenched. Until then my opinion of past societies will never be softened by it supposedly being a sign of the times. It's a sign of ALL times, including ours. It's still wrong and unforgivable.
I was fascinated by the story of the goofy scientist who spent his life searching for psychic powers and wound up creating the E.E.G. instead. It's amazing he committed suicide due to feelings of failure and inadequacy when he created that wonder that is still in use today.
I thought the visual effects as we traveled inside the grain of sand were quite marvelous. Tyson makes a compelling case that if the Universe runs under steady physics laws it can potentially be knowable. I personally find that to be a bit of wishful thinking, and possibly even human hubris, but the math he's using actually checks out there. I just don't believe the Universe's laws are purposeful as he thinks they are. That feeling of a muddled, chaotic Universe he described is how I've felt every morning since I've woken up for the past four years in this country. Tyson's positive view of our knowing the Universe might not be hubris or narcissism. It might simply be optimism. Of which I do not share.
Fascinating stuff that made me question my prejudices, which is always healthy. ****.
Fargo "Camp Elegance"
Rabbi is awesome. He went all out to protect that kid, and give him the choice he never got. I love that character. Unreservedly.
After that opening scene, I'm starting to think Gaetano's reputation as a criminal mastermind is entirely unearned. What a dope.
Speaking of which, I love that Odis is left with no good options, and is screwed no matter what. For some reason I hate that character more than most of the others this season, despite not having done as much horrible stuff as some. It's his attitude I don't like and every inch of his discomfort and alarm here makes me smile.
Good for Josto for not even dignifying New York's orders to make amends with his brother as something that could seriously happen. Gaetano is the entire reason this mess is happening at all. I also question the idea that Gaetano has friends back home. Have they actually MET the guy? This is the precise type of person who is NOT built for friends. Sociopaths gotta sociopath.
What is going on with Oraetta? What is the point of her storyline? I've questioned Ethelrida's place in the narrative too, but at least her stuff is connected with Loy and her aunts. Mayflower is just an annoying loose end that so far doesn't seem to serve any purpose. I get the notion of having a "wild card" in a story. But a given story should usually have a hint of how the card could be played, good or bad. At present, she's so much confusing nonsense with a bad accent. Not a fan of the character or her arc so far.
Honestly? I roundly disliked last week. This episode is getting things a bit back on track. ***1/2.
Mr. Mercedes "Missed You"
Season 1 was pretty much a straight adaptation of Mr. Mercedes, but it appears Season 2 and on are going to diverge from The Bill Hodges Trilogy from this point forward. I don't object. Finders Keepers is an interesting book in and of itself, but it doesn't have much else to do with the rest of the trilogy of the Bill Hodges characters. I think King made the book when he expected the Hodges books to have a longer run than they did, and recurring detectives often have adventures unrelated to everything else. But once the next book became about Brady Hartfield coming back while Bill was dying, and became the grand finale, Finders Keepers feels a bit out of place. I would not object to them either ignoring it or saving it for season 3.
I like the TV versions of Babineau and Cora much better than their book versions. They are not only more sympathetic and interesting, they are far sexier too (they aren't hooked up in the book). Isn't TV great?
Another huge divergence from the books is that Pete dies here. Granted, The Outsider is already off the table from this version of the characters, but that changes Holly's future arc entirely anyways.
I think the show has the most interesting soundtrack. What's also great is we tend to be allowed to hear the entire eclectic and soulful songs. It's a treat to listen to this show and hear many great songs I have never heard before.
The episode had an interesting scene that possibly King should have done himself. Although I have found King is a far more credible writer than the average TV writers, so that's probably why it didn't happen. But Bill comes THIS close to kill Brady when no-one is looking. It's treated as ethically right that he pulls back at the last second, but what's great is that readers of the book know it's a full-on mistake. King would not write that scene because it's not plausible Bill would be allowed alone with Brady, or be able to drop in unannounced. But just because TV doesn't really know how to do CREDIBLE drama, doesn't mean that non-credible stuff isn't INTERESTING drama. It's a trade-off. I confess I prefer King's grounded approach to storytelling. But that sure as heck was an interesting scene in and of itself here.
Good premiere. ****.
Mr. Mercedes "Let's Go Roaming"
Eh. Some things I'm not loving.
The Brady stuff is all right (although them turning so much of it sexual is icky) but I'm not happy about what they are doing with Jerome. Him having bad grades in college is something that is only happening because the season must be short and they need an extra complication. The book was very careful to portray Jerome's smarts and education as admirable.
On the one hand I think Jerome isn't cool for vaping. On the other, at least he never doesn't that embarrassing pickaninny voice Stephen King painfully saddled him with. But bonus demerits over the idea that he dress polices and slut-shames Barbara.
Not very happy with this episode. **1/2.
Mr. Mercedes "You Can Go Home Now"
So we're going straight into End Of Watch. I have no objection to this (although the timing of Bill's cancer might need to be changed. Maybe not though. It's hinted here he knows he's sick). I'm curious how that handheld game is going to fit into all of this.
Bill ex-wife never appeared in the book but she's a series regular here.
I love Bill's rage to Holly over the fact that their cases SUCK. And I especially love that when she agrees with him, she points out that they are equal partners and this is something he should have talked to her about instead. And it floors him and he's like "Fair enough." I love these two together.
I especially love how bad Holly is at the field stuff. She won't always be but it's totally in character that this should be a weak spot for her at this stage of the game. I found her a little TOO good at this right off the bat in the book.
For the record, Holly's love of movies and pop-culture should have come up already. She mentioned it once last season and it's been dropped. Outside of trying to quit smoking, it's her defining character trait, and how she makes comparisons to what is happening in her life. The Outsider also missed this part of her, but The Outsider's take was so out of character that didn't shock me. Here, they are actually trying to do right by her. And they can't as long as she isn't a movie nerd who references everything she can think of.
But I honestly really loved that episode. ****1/2.
Mr. Mercedes "Motherboard"
Lou is SUCH an easy character to sympathize and root for. I really prefer the show's version to the book's.
Mike Starr doesn't look anything like Al the Janitor does in my head, which is another good reason Stephen King rarely uses visual descriptions to pin down a character's appearance. It makes casting particularly easy.
I think Ida is Godsend to the show. I am about to say a very unkind thing about Stephen King. It is clear he loves Holly Gibney very much. But he treats her like a male writer would and that's not a compliment. He has Bill wish she would smile more because she's pretty when she does, and he has her think she can't live or function without Bill. Clearly in later stories, she can. But I would have adored it if King had had a second female character like Ida around to tell Holly that she doesn't need to depend on Bill or another man for her life to have meaning. At least King proves Holly's idea about that in the book wrong. But if he were writing the character in a progressive, feminist perspective (which I think is necessary for men writing complicated women characters) he would have had another woman tell her that long before Bill died.
Bill was great in the episode. I don't know if the writing has settled on this show or what, but he's written much more in character this season than he was in season 1. I was very unhappy with his temper and his tendency to lash out against characters who loved him and were trying to help him. He's much chiller this season. And there were three scenes (maybe three and a half) that got that point across.
I love him sort of delicately pointing out that he does need his space if Holly's gonna crash there, her saying he's hurting her feelings, and him gently saying he's hoping by saying this he'll spare them in the future. That was great. Bill never said that in the book but it's something he might have said if King had thought of it.
The second scene I love was Bill being completely unapologetic over Anton flipping his lid over seeing his Big Board. He's not the least bit embarrassed because he knows Anton won't believe him, and that's the reason he can't work with the cops about this at all. For the record, in the book, it's Holly who gets to the psychic connection with Brady first, and Bill spends a great deal of the climax as Dana Scully until he can no longer deny the obvious. They've sort of reversed the roles here. It works fine and I don't object. If they aren't going to give Holly her movie obsession, perhaps having a lack of imagination IS a fault the TV version of the character would possess. It's fine with me.
The third (or third and half) thing I loved was Bill's scenes with Sadie's mother. He's not particularly comforting, which was an interesting way portray that, but he's empathetic and gets that specific thing might not get the proper response. Instead he uses reason and tells as much of the truth as he is comfortable with while admitting he tell can't her everything. He is not consoling at all, but the way he is compassionate is that he is treating her and her daughter like real people, not random victims. He's offering real help and closure in a way nobody else is willing to. And God bless it, it totally works. We didn't see much of the Bill who was supposedly an amazing cop in season 1. I'm glad this season is getting to that finally.
So yeah, that was a pretty great episode. ****.
Mr. Mercedes "Andale"
Montez is pretty much a monster to everyone in the episode, and yet the second Brady uses Al to kill his dog, my sympathies are entirely with him and I look forward to his and Bill's team-up. It's weird how quickly my negative opinion was solidified by the first half of the episode, and completely changed by the second.
I love how unforgiving Holly is of Bill. That's actually reasonable and I love that he's not off the hook.
I don't like where things were left off with Maggie considering the limb Bill made her climb out on here. He cunningly claimed to her she was being groomed to be a patsy whenever Babineau eventually went down (cunning especially because that actually seems likely and true) and said she could use a friend. The fact that he didn't go to her by the end of the episode says the friend isn't him. And as far as using friends go, that's entirely one-sided in his favor. They could fix this in the next episode or two but that is literally something that needed to be addressed immediately. Because as of now, I think Bill's a heel.
I liked some of it and I disliked some of it. ***1/2.
Mr. Mercedes "Proximity"
I love Bill and Ida together. That is all.
Fred the Tortoise is the weirdest thing David E Kelley added to the franchise by a longshot.
I have changed my mind about this show's portrayal of Jerome. While I still love King's untroubled positive version, what I love about the troubles Jerome has on this show is that they are real and understandable for a black man in his circumstances. There is something to be said about King's optimistic view of that character's future. But the reality of what that person would experience in America in the late 2010's is probably MUCH closer to this show's idea. America is even more currently fudged up than when King originally conceived his story about a racist, psychopathic, mass murdering serial killer. Sad but true.
I'm a little bit sick of Cora already. Felix is like "I'm you're husband!" And Cora sucks because she is dumb enough to believe "They are my employer!" is the winning response to that. I totally agree with him flipping out over that, and realizing this is not the person he was led to believe he had married. That was some righteous rage right there.
The show is trying to show Cora is unfathomably corrupt for not being willing to entertain the idea that Bill's motivation is altruism. Instead I think she's dumb. Even if she's right (and she's not, and that's a dumb, untrue opinion that would cross the lips of a misanthropic sociopath like Gregory House) he IS the best shot they've got of "waking" Brady. If Cora were actually clever, and still believed that stupid sociopathic thing, she would still use Bill while their interests aligned. It's not like he already doesn't know the full story. He basically gave the store away in revealing what he learned about her and the Chinese. In fact, with what he DOES know, her smartest and safest play IS in fact keeping him close. The show is trying to show Cora's personality defect is an unwillingness to believe there is good in people. Instead I think her character defect is that she is too stupid and paranoid to use a gift horse to her best advantage when it is offered.
Maggie is still feeding information to Bill? That woman is a saint. And I don't find that credible at all.
Part of that episode annoyed me, but I like this version of Jerome for the first time ever. ***1/2.
Mr. Mercedes "Fell On Black Days"
I found Mike Starr's breakdown near the beginning of the episode thoroughly unconvincing. It actually bordered on laughable. He did a much better job when Library Al was possessed by Brady.
Good for Ida for getting some. She can't wait around for Bill forever.
I liked the scene between Babineau and Lou.
My favorite thing in the episode occurred near the end. It was the decision to shift Brady's perspective entirely into his headspace imagining himself as a boxer while seeing tense scenes of Bill, Holly, and Donna entering their homes and workplaces unawares. It suddenly (and alarmingly) makes the audience realize that Brady could be the last place we want him to be. Very clever narrative choice there. It played exactly like a horror movie. As it should have.
The idea of the doctor being reluctant to move Brady because he's good for business is the futility of authority in horror movies in a nutshell. The heroes absolutely know the truth about what Brady is doing, and how he's doing it. And it doesn't matter while the people in charge are profiting from the monster instead. It's a perfect horror movie moral, fitting because this episode was the one most like a horror movie.
Bad things about the episode? It is not remotely plausible Holly has never heard the expression "Across the pond". She's Asperger's, not stupid. That is not a case of taking something literally. It's an expression someone who is supposed to be as well-versed in cinema as she is would know intimately by how often it is used in movies and TV shows. Nice try, show. But just because Holly can't read people or understand sarcasm doesn't mean she doesn't speak English. The producers might do well to remember that in the future.
Al's breakdown's and Holly out-of-character dumbness notwithstanding, that was a pretty solid episode. ***1/2.
Mr. Mercedes "Nobody Puts Brady In A Crestmore"
The escape at the end was great, because it was not something Brady was ever able to manage in the book, so it was quite unexpected.
I think Jerome's father is being ridiculous with the groceries. Example of toxic masculinity overthinking the littlest and most insignificant thing. It's tiresome. And frankly outside of Jerome's parents in the books.
While I suppose most viewers will find the way Holly forces her Aspie crush into a date with her cute, I like that fact that in the books, for whatever unknown reason, she doesn't date. It mystifies Barbara and Jerome in "If It Bleeds" and the fact that we are never given a solid reason for why not is a pretty cool mystery. I don't like the show messing with that specific idea. It's not as egregious as Holly kissing strangers in HBO's version of The Outsider. But it bugs me a little for the same reason.
Brady's psychic stuff in the book was entirely unproven and only known to Bill, Holly, and Jerome. The fact that this notion seems to have gained currency with much of the rest of the cast suggests that when this is all over, whichever of Babineau's enablers survive Hartfield's insanity, means there will probably be accountability for this, which was annoyingly absent in the book.
If they weren't able to get back Kelly Lynch, they shouldn't have brought back Brady's mother at ALL at the end. Honestly, that was so freaking awkward. Even worse than Buffy's "appearance" in Angel's "The Girl In Question".
I also am getting a better feel for season 3. If I'm not mistaken (and I could be) Finders Keepers will simply be ignored or made an insignificant subplot. What I think Season 3 is gonna be is Brady's mass suicide plot. He's already got an advantage because he's escaped from the hospital, but the fact that he's done that makes me wonder how and why he'll be able to do that and what if any part the Zap Its and Fishin Hole will play. I feel like this season is the first half of End Of Watch, and the third and final season will be the second half. We'll see. They could disappoint me and wrap this up in two episodes instead, but I very much doubt it. There is STILL a ton of awesome psychic stuff from the book they can play with and pretty much HAVE to get to to be considered a successful adaptation.
Pretty great episode. ****1/2.
Mr. Mercedes "Walk Like A Man"
That blew. I was very, very, VERY unhappy by the end of that. Ironically I enjoyed maybe the first three quarters of the episode. But the episode is not only getting a failing grade for the last fifteen minutes, it's getting the lowest failing grade possible.
I'll talk the parts I liked in a little bit, not because I want to leave the review on a positive note (which is usually why I talk about good stuff second) but because the bulk of the review will be on the show's failings and I don't want to get too off-point from that until I've said everything. Perhaps that means I should talk about the good things first. But this episode's weaknesses are something I feel the need to dive right into.
Let me offer the cruelest insult I could ever give this show or any other show: It feels like it was written by David E Kelley. Ironically it WAS, but so were a couple of other early episodes, including the Pilot, and he was very light on his insufferable gimmicks there. The Practice also got more ludicrous as it went along, but I had hoped Kelley had simply stepped back on his role on this series, and just would never write another episode again. And the fact that he's still on the writing staff, if not a showrunner, is going to be a HUGE problem if he's hired to write pivotal episodes like this. Kelley has cruel knack for taking a show with a good premise and absolutely destroying every last aspect of it. Once that is taken care of, he often fires half the cast. And once that happens, he leaves the show, and puts it in the hands of other writers who aren't invested in it to salvage the corpse, and it limps along until it is invariably canceled. That's his M.O., and he is one of the most destructive producers working in Hollywood, with absolutely NO loyalty to his actors or his writing staff. Killed off cast members of The Walking Dead were treated better and more respectfully when they were written out of that show. And that's not even getting into his toxic misogyny and homophobia. He is bad for television, and this episode was everything I feared this show would be when I heard he developed it.
This was aired in 2018, and before George Floyd, but I want to point out that even if it hadn't been, the idea behind Bill being in trouble for assaulting Brady in the hospital is ludicrous. To be absolutely 100% fair, Bill suggests to Holly he might get heat solely because he isn't a cop anymore, and he could be considered a good fall guy. But cops in our Universe don't even get charged for murdering innocent unarmed people. That's why the Black Lives Matters protests exist. In reality, Bill almost killing somebody as horrible as Brady is the kind of thing the public would want to pin a medal on him for. People in the media interviewing people who thought Brady was gentle and human is wrong too. I get that Kyle Rittenhouse got some benefit from that because the world we live in is horrible, but Brady did not kill left-wing protesters. He killed non-political people EVERYONE considered innocent, including a mother and her baby. Even if there were people willing to bothsides that idea, the media itself would not be interviewing them. The media would be out for blood and would actually be right to be so. Nancy Grace would be having a field day. They wouldn't be interviewing the idiot proprietor of the local five and dime with stars in his eyes over the fact that Brady didn't maliciously murder her when he had the chance.
This boils down to Kelley's biggest flaw, and it's something that drives me nuts, and it appalls me because critics cannot recognize it for what it is, and hand him a pile of Emmys for it instead. Kelley is a dishonest storyteller. Every story he tells is a lie as far as what the human experience really is. He doesn't understand people, and if he does, he lies about what they would and wouldn't do in any situation to suit his own agenda. He makes characters do random things that are not believable to service a story that is not credible. When Brady and Bill end the episode in the prison cell together I realized for the first time this IS actually a David E Kelley show. He thinks so little of his audience he thinks we'd believe the cops would ever do that. And the sickest, most depressing thing is, that based on the Emmys he's gotten for Picket Fences, Ally McBeal, and The Practice, all far worse shows than this as far as credibility goes, he's not wrong. Maybe I can say he's misjudging the taste of the average TV viewer in 2018. But he sure as h*ll pulled the wool over the eyes of a LOT of critics and people who gave out awards during his heyday. David E Kelley and Diane English doing so well at the Emmys is why I think it's a worthless honor. The People's Choice Award has more weight in my eyes because we aren't told to take it seriously. Why would Breaking Bad tout an Emmy win to begin with? The groundbreaking shows that have lost at the Emmys (or have never even been nominated) are a LOT more respectable company for Vince Gilligan than David E Kelley and his overpraised ilk.
I promised to talk about a couple of good things. The notion of Brady begging Cora for a kiss was an equal level of revulsion and wish fulfillment for the audience. I don't EVER want it to happen, and I simultaneously want it to happen more than anything I've ever wanted in my entire life before it does. What tips the scales away from the ickiness is Brady using the argument to Cora that it would sell a lot of books. Anyone who can correctly read the prostitution level of a PR person deserved that kiss. No matter how repulsive they are. Case closed.
The other good thing is something I've ruminated a bit about as I was writing this review, and I must unhappily couch my praise as not necessarily being a good thing. I did not believe Brady's remorse in the slightest. Why? Because it would be narrative malpractice to do that after all this. I liked it because I reasoned no writer would be stupid enough to do that. And I realize we are ultimately entering a courtroom phase for the story (which did not exist in the book) which makes me ask: "David E Kelley, please stand. On the charge of being an insufferable hack who commits narrative malpractice on a weekly basis, and destroys every show he's ever created, has the jury reached a verdict? What say you?"*
Basically it is suicide for the show and the characters Stephen King came up with, and spent three (and more) books exploring. But David E Kelley is perfectly at home killing his shows, and forcing other producers to try (and fail) to clean up the disastrous messes he's left in his wake. I liked the idea as it was happening because it suggested a great master plan on Brady's end. That's still possible, but once the episode ended with him and Bill in a cell together, it's not the sure thing it would be on a competent and honest show either. Kelley could be legitimately setting up an ethical courtroom controversy at the expense of Stephen King and the characters. I would never put something like that past that utter lout.
I'm tired of television being ruined by people like David E Kelley. Most people have seen through him at this point, but I'm upset he gained enough unearned credibility earlier in his career to still be allowed to ruin television today. It bums me out. 0.
*I TOLD you I hate David E Kelley. Me referencing the idiotic "What say you?" proves it.
Mr. Mercedes "Fade To Blue"
Shark. Jumped.
I watch a lot of television. I watch a lot of good television. I watch a lot of great television. I also watch a lot of bad television. I am loathe to give up a show once I've started it. Dropping a show is a last resort. I have not dropped this show. But the fact that I do watch so much television that is good and bad has led me to come up with my own truism. A Matt Zimmerism, if you would. And it is this: Every single good, and even GREAT television show is two horrible episodes in a row away from being a terrible television show. An irredeemably terrible television series that can never recover or regain what used to be good about it. You can have a horrible episode occasionally on a good show. Two in a row is not necessarily a deal-breaker for every show either. But the thing that causes the irredeemable shark jump usually winds up simply being two horrible episodes in a row with bad story decisions. It only takes two episodes to utterly destroy a show and the viewer's trust in it. And it can happen to ANY great show if the writer isn't careful. It could have happened to Breaking Bad and The Wire if the writers didn't know what they were doing instead.
Mr. Mercedes just had those two episodes. It can't come back from this. I'll watch Season 3. I might even like an episode or two. But I'll never like or enjoy the show as a whole again. It is permanently ruined. Which is utterly in character for David E Kelley and describes everything he has ever written.
This was a LONG episode and for two separate (and understandable) reasons I wanted it to be over. The first reason was simple: It was a terrible episode, and it actually pained me having to sit through and watch something that bad the entire way through. I get mad at TV shows I watch all the time. But the longing in my brain for something I was watching to simply be over because it was so embarrassingly bad is a rare feeling. A lot of times I enjoy watching bad television because I know I'll wring some great reviews out of it. And I love psychologically deconstructing utter cr*p in the way my reviews do. But the last time I was like "This is so bad I am having trouble sitting still and watching this," was the animated movie Superman: Brainiac Attacks. To be honest, I have felt this feeling this strongly one more time since then. I felt it during the series premiere of the short-lived American version of Prime Suspect. But in that case I didn't make it and shut it off after 15 minutes. And to be fair, there are dumb sitcoms and cartoons that are like nails on a chalkboard to me, and I immediately change the channel when they come on: I'm talking Saved By The Bell, Johnny Test, Ed, Edd, and Eddy, Pac-Man And The Ghostly Adventures, Xavier: Renegade Angel, Robot Chicken, and every single Disney Channel and Nickelodeon kidcom that ever existed. But those are shows that annoy me whenever they pop up in the background. I rarely if ever feel this level of suck for something I actually sit down and try to watch.
The second reason I wanted it to be over is because I knew I had to utterly destroy that. And I knew that after 15 minutes, and I felt annoyed at having to watch 45 additional minutes of David E Kelley masturbative courtroom nonsense to write what I already could tell you early on. It wouldn't be fair to review and destroy the episode without having done that, so I actually NEEDED to see every inch of that trainwreck. And if anything it got worse and worse as it went along. And I wanted to do it NOW.
Kelley has a knack for lying to audiences about how the world operates. He was supposedly at one point a lawyer. If so he's also a liar. He has fictional "legal experts" on television here saying that Brady's defense (that he's a new rebooted person and shouldn't have to pay for the crimes when he was crazier) is a valid one. It's not. Kelley actually knows that and just lied to you. To your face. If Brady is conflicted and confused after committing the crimes in OUR Universe, too bad, so sad, he's still getting the chair. No judge would ever entertain a notion that crazy as his defense lawyer's here. Over the years I had been unpleasantly led to believe that David E Kelley is a stupid person. A smart person should not be writing scripts this bad. And I came to a possibly worse explanation as his output wore on. He might not actually be this stupid. He just believes you are. And the Emmy voters proved him right during every contest that mattered during the 1990's. And that utterly sickens me.
And how dare he after this torturous season for poor Lou, the ONE great character on the show, unendingly suffering this year, that he put her in legal jeopardy for doing what Holly, Bill, and Jerome were allowed to do in the book without consequence? Yes, Holly, Bill, and Jerome were in actual mortal peril while Brady was possessing Babineau's body in the book. But why wasn't Lou granted that excuse? Why did Kelley make Hartsfield's remorse a controversy up for debate, and put her in that moral position? It's absolutely obscene on every level. If there is a second thing Kelley will always do in his shows besides lie and manipulative the audience, it mistreats the women on the show, especially if they are women the audience actually cares about. I'm trying to think of a word for that level of sickness woven into the level of his writing output. "Pathological" comes the closest to expressing my disgust, but it also doesn't feel strong enough considering the amount of times he's done this. And he has shelves full of Emmys. And David Lynch and Joss Whedon have none. Joss Whedon is problematic for his own reasons, but there is no denying he was robbed of Emmys for his earlier career before he went off the rails.
Also what was the point of the psychic control plotline if it was going to lead to THIS? Kelley not only is famous for firing actors who no longer interest him, but abandoning entire plots and concepts once he is bored with them. In "On Writing" Stephen King argues that it's often good if a writer doesn't know where the story is going, and that not knowing can lead them in pleasantly surprising directions and unexpected endings. King's entire output is a good argument in favor of that notion. Kelley's entire output is really the only rebuttal someone who disagrees with King would ever need. I'm curious what he must have thought about that idea leading to THIS on a show based on his books (and one that he has a vanity show producing credit on to boot). Oh, well. Uncle Stevie STILL gets to cash the check. The only ones out of luck over his partnership with Kelley are the Constant Readers, and the viewers. But King gets paid, so water under the bridge, am I right?
Also, did they expect me NOT to notice that there were no cell bars between Bill and Brady at the end of the last episode, and they have conveniently popped up at the beginning of this one? Do you know who was unhappy with this development? Annie Wilkes. Girl stood up in the theater over that and raged her truth to everyone listening. I won't chop off anyone's foot for it, but I am also not as unobservant as Kelly thinks I am.
I'm annoyed Jerome and Holly were barely in these past two episodes. They have absolutely nothing to do with the end of Brady Hartsfield, which is an absolutely insane storytelling decision. Holly not being granted a final confrontation with him is especially unforgivable.
I am angry. I am spent. I am sad. I am unsurprised. One thing television critics who loved Kelley's stuff in the 1990's would always call his craziest and least credible scenes was "Classic David E Kelley". What none of them saying that understood at the time was that that was an insult of the highest order. This episode was Classic David E Kelley. And television and my brain are worse for it (and him) existing. 0.
DuckTales "Escape From The ImpossiBin!"
Man, that was absolutely tiresome. I was fed up by the end of that. It's the cheeky, yet melodramatic tone that absolutely infuriates me. What if the Uncle Scrooge comics were written by someone as insufferable as David E Kelley? This was not a thing I needed to know how it would turn out. Ugh.
Do you know what bugs me most? The episode isn't entirely worthless. There were some individual elements I thought were neat. The show is so bad it doesn't even allow me to hate it as much as I should and it deserves. It having definite selling points is one of the most annoying things about it. It would easier to dismiss entirely if it did everything wrong.
Basically the whole "Family is everything", "We Ducks can never be defeated", "You always have to be on your guard", these are all things that cause me to stress-eat. Also annoying and a bit alarming are the times the Ducks refer to Bradford as a carrion eater, and use other insults based on the fact that he's a vulture. That is an explicit Duck comic no-no. Not only should the Duck treats themselves and everyone in the cast as regular people, slamming Bradford for explicitly being a vulture is outright racist. It's utterly wrong for not only violating the rules the comics set up, but making the rules THIS show has set up seem utterly vulgar.
Let's get to the few things I liked. Two of those involved Donald. I like the idea that Donald could credibly be confused with being the resident tough adventurer who has never lost a fight, and I like that Donald is given his comic book role as the voice of reason at the end (which came a bit too little too late if you ask me). I also thought the solution out of the original gravity trap was brilliant and filled with clever and genius visuals. Not a ton of "action sequences" on the show I like. I liked that one specifically because the Ducks got through it using their heads like they are supposed to.
I want to give that zero stars and write off the show and never watch it again. But the fact that the show isn't PERFECTLY awful means I would never be able to justify doing that to anyone who reads my reviews. It's not very often I wish a show was worse than it was. And the sad truth is that this show would have to be a LOT worse than it is currently for me to actually drop it. That's messed up, right? **1/2.
Big Hero 6: The Series "Cobra And Mongoose / Better Off Fred"
Cobra And Mongoose:
Minimax continues to be adorable (and with the best catchphrases).
The episode felt pretty jam-packed, which considering the 11 minute runtime is a compliment. ****1/2.
Better Of Fred:
That contained more romance in 11 minutes than Jeph Loeb's entire cartoon output at Marvel Television.
Supersonic Stu's dad's name was Supersonic Stupid? I am not surprised at all, and yet that strikes me as really sad at the same time.
Do you know what wasn't? I always love how supportive and loving Sue is of her grandson.
The animation in the fantasy sequences at the beginning was great.
That was cute. Fred usually isn't, so I'm pleased. ****.
Episode Overall: ****1/2.
Marvel's Spider-Man: Maximum Venom "Maximum Venom"
Let's just say I'm ready to move on from the Jeph Loeb / Marvel Television / Man Of Action stuff. That's all I really have to say.
What? You demand a further review beyond that? Fine.
Passable. Acceptable. And that doesn't pass muster and is UNacceptable to me. No, it is not the trainwreck Black Panther's Quest wound up as, but I don't think demanding a great last episode from an action cartoon is asking for the moon either. Better than Avengers Assemble is no kind of bar in a Universe that's designed properly. I'm talking about OUR Universe by the way. There is no part of the Jeph Loeb-era Marvel Cartoon Universe that is remotely designed properly.
Ugh. The Avengers. I could have died happy never seeing the Avengers Assemble version of the Avengers ever again. Those characters are so annoying. So much so that they annoyed me in an entirely new way, which is SO them. Have you noticed that Hulk appeared more in this episode than he did during the entire fifth season? Yeah. THAT is the design of Jeph Loeb's Marvel Cartoon Universe. And it sucks.
And hearing Peter say all of these wonderful and moving empowering words of encouragement to Max Modell and how much he means to him actually made me mad. Because before this brief six-episode season, Max was a pretty unambiguously despicable character who treated Peter terribly on every level. I don't like the show retconning his terrible actions in the last episode as if he's been a friend and mentor to Peter this entire time. Not even close. He's basically been using Peter in the first two seasons, profiting from his inventions, while refusing to offer him a scholarship to the school despite Peter earning him money hand over fist. And Peter is desperately poor and can't afford the tuition on his own, while Max is constantly harassing him to pay it on-screen. Max was basically running this poor kid ragged for the "privilege" of creating inventions for him and making him rich. I am NOT okay with Peter telling Max what a good person he is. He's a turd.
Ironically, I wouldn't actually object if Peter was merely jiving Max simply to get him to throw off the Symbiote. He doesn't have to MEAN that Max is great if it gets the job done and saves the day. But the moment is played as if Peter is being entirely sincere instead, which is beyond irritating.
Grady not knowing they are all Spiders feels like the stupidest of loose ends. What kills me is it could have been fixed with one line of dialogue and a reaction shot from Grady. It's the last episode. It changes nothing. Instead I feel like Grady is going into this new enterprise at a disadvantage from everyone else, (which is an icky feeling) and with his eyes entirely closed from the truth. And wasn't it Harry himself who always ragged on Peter for this exact same kind of thing? Why is he participating in this dishonesty instead? Ugh. Unnecessary, man.
I noticed two things about the special effects in the climax: First, that they were great, and second, that maybe the show shouldn't get a TON of credit for that. Because this show is clearly done on the dirt cheap, and if great effects are actually affordable and easy to do, it's literally the least they can do. I would actually settle for passable effects and a great story instead. But this is how Loeb's Marvel Cartoon Universe is actually designed, and I don't ever get what I want from it.
And I'm not EVER calling this or the other recent shows an "Animated Universe". Cartoon Universe is all it gets. "Animated Universe" suggests of prestige and effort with continuity none of these show have bothered to put in any work toward. It's an insult to the stuff done by Bruce Timm and Greg Weisman to pretend this is any sort of continuity at ALL. It's random cartoon nonsense on its best day.
Still, I'll give them points for not only explaining the season subtitle, but having it make a lick of sense. What did the Sinister 6 actually have to do with Ultimate Spider-Man's last season anyways?
Am I correct in thinking that the reason this season existed at ALL was to capitalize on the surprise success of the Venom movie? If that's so, am I crazy to wonder why Eddie Brock didn't appear once? Is it even MORE unreasonable to wonder why he was never even mentioned? I get Venom is Sony, but Marvel is usually better at synergy, and if they wanted to bask in Venom's success, they could at least give Sony their due and not ignore everything they did, including using Brock.
I feel like this review is harsher than I actually feel towards the episode. The episode was acceptable, especially by the standards of the rest of the Loeb cartoons. But I'm tired of settling for acceptable and acting like that is okay in 2020. It's totally not. I'll be giving this a healthy three and a half stars served with a fresh helping of Michelle Obama-level shade and side-eye. It's pretty much what the episode and the entire series has deserved. And that's ALL it's deserved if you ask me. ***1/2.
LEGO Marvel Avengers: Climate Conundrum "Friends And Foes: Part 3: Red Skull's Revenge"
I like Hulk and Cap on the motorcycle doing their own version of the Fastball Special.
I like that Hammer tries to turn on Red Skull when learning the extent of his evil plan.
The airbag joke with the AIM soldier was funny.
Pretty good. ***1/2.
LEGO Marvel Avengers: Climate Conundrum "Wild Weather: Part 1: Desert Debacle"
All right, but nothing special. ***.
Power Rangers Beast Morphers "Grid Connection"
Only here for Jason, so that's mostly what I'll talk about.
Austin St. John took off a lot of the weight he put on after he retired from acting for this appearance. Not all of it by a longshot. He's still hefty. But what surprises me more than anything is that Jason is like, OLD now. Whenever Jason David Frank shows up as Tommy he's got the wrinkles around his eyes, and often a cheesy goatee to boot, but the truth is, he still has a youthful look and demeanor. St. John is middle-aged with a middle-aged guy's raspy voice, and it's very interesting (and a little personally depressing at the same time.)
Can I just say I actually really like the idea that St. John wasn't able to shed ALL the weight? I think we have been overdue for a plus-sized Ranger, (especially considering the fat shaming this show does even to this day), and who could they possibly do better for that than one of the most beloved Rangers of all time? I will not sneer at St. John for his metabolism slowing down as he grew older. It might be about time for the show to prove that heroes can come in all shapes and body types. I remember what a major win it was that the original series made the Blue Ranger a nerd outcast with glasses. The show wound up doing very wrong by Billy and David Yost in the end, but I think they did right by Jason being heavy here.
I thought the evil six-headed Zord was kind of cool, and obviously overpowered, because by all rights there is no way those four good guy Megazords could have blown up something that huge. But Power Rangers has always believed in ending their episodes with "The good guys win just because" so it's not out of character for the franchise.
I am a little leery of the moral that Devon should have taken Keeper's warning seriously. Is that the message we're teaching kids now? Always listen to fortune-tellers instead of your own common sense? Because I don't think that's a good moral at all for the real toddlers watching the show.
The news that a reboot is coming is making me rethink not watching next season. Because if Dino Fury winds up the last show in the original continuity, they might have some interesting guest appearances in store as this era of the franchise winds up for good. My dream is Jason, Tommy, and Kimberly (The Trinity) reunited in the series finale. I haven't made a decision to watch Dino Fury for sure, but I'm also not sure to check out like I was planning to before this week's reboot announcement.
I'm a little confused about how the Mighty Morphin Rangers are still active when going by the show history they all retired, or handed off their powers to the next generation. Trini is actually in all likelihood DEAD, so the Yellow Ranger being there was another open question. Similarly, didn't the Dino Charge Rangers give up their powers in their last episode too? The Dinosaurs being present in this episode suggests this takes place after the Dino Charge finale. So when did they get the Energems back?
I utterly lost interest in the franchise when Jason, then Kimberly, then Tommy left. To me, those guys WERE the show, and I don't really see the appeal of different Ranger incarnations. I basically have been watching the later Nickelodeon seasons in the hope to see some of the earlier Rangers and characters from that era show up. I think Beast Morphers is a weak season, but I like that it's the one that gave us hefty, middle-aged Jason. I'll remember it fondly for that alone. ****1/2.
Genddy Tartakovsky's Primal "The Night Feeder"
Here's an opinion about the show I've never heard anyone else bring up yet: This show has the scariest sound effects I have ever heard. The visuals in the episode didn't give up much, but I could close my eyes during the entire thing and still pee my pants.
I feared the worst from the Night Feeder. The absolute worst. I expected it to be the worst possible thing it could possibly be. And I thanked God that it was a just supernaturally fast, horrible raptor Spear had no business believably killing. Do you know what I worried the Night Feeder was?
Another T-Rex. Of the opposite sex. Fang's behavior at the beginning of not wanting Spear to react to the ruckus of the Triceratops slaughter had me fearing the worst. Could you imagine how bad that would be? For both Spear and Fang? Spear and Fang's only advantage is each other, and another T-Rex would wreck that quick. I was very glad this episode was far less terrifying than my worst imagination feared it to be.
It's not like I'll be able to sleep tonight after hearing those sound effects anyways. ****.
Cosmos: Possible Worlds "Ladder To The Stars"
That was totally cheesy. And I loved every inch of it.
The music and visual effects in this franchise continue to astound me. It makes whatever cheesy thing is happening magical instead.
Lot of interesting things to learn here.
My biggest takeaways were learning that as a species of hunter / gatherers, human beings used to be able to get along and live in peace with each other just fine. Even after the agricultural revolution, humans remained so and the first generations of that society were egalitarian. Neil DeGrasse Tyson is smart to point that out because it tells us something that we had been led to believe the opposite about: The violence and darkness we see in the world was not necessarily a part of human nature this entire time. It probably wasn't even necessary had our societies made better choices. People used to live together as equals with no problems, before and after they plowed the land and built homes for themselves. It's the war and the fighting that is unnatural and the learned behavior. It's not an intrinsic facet to our species. I did not know that, and I feel better for knowing that. One of the selling points of this show is that I usually feel better about the world than I did before I saw a given episode because I learn positive things about the world I didn't know. And that's awesome.
The idea of Spinoza's controversial beliefs and writing, and his subsequent shunning turns the show overtly political in describing the fact that this was before the American values of democracy and freedom of ideas were fully established. It's a good way to say that the current intolerance and hatred we are suffering through is similar to what people had to suffer in the Age of Enlightenment. It also suggests we might come out of it okay.
We need to treat bees better. The return to the Hall of Extinction did not make me happy and Tyson did not look happy revisiting it either, particularly since between the show's brief hiatus and now, we have learned a great deal about our place in it in the meantime. The show isn't always entirely good news.
Very cool idea for the relay station to Alpha Centauri. I also learn neat stuff on this show.
They shortened the long theme song a bit. I prefer the longer one.
Whatever the problems Tyson was having in his personal life that caused the show to be postponed, I AM glad it's back. ****1/2.
Cosmos: Possible Worlds "Shadows Of Forgotten Ancestors"
I was not feeling this at all. And I think my problem is best exemplified by Tyson's admiring telling of the story of Ashoka. Here's an opinion: Ashoka sucked. Period. There are plenty of heroes throughout history who performed their good deeds without committing mass torture and genocide and killing their entire families first. I don't find the story of Ashoka about wisdom gained and redemption earned. I find it about justice escaped. There are some things that are simply should NOT be allowed to stand. Ashoka's rule after all of the evil things he did was one of them.
There were a lot of provocative images and notions in the episode including the idea that the kind of "us versus them" mentality leads to demagogues and supremacy. It's basically failed pattern recognition.
However, Tyson said there really wasn't a single thing humans did that you couldn't find in the animal kingdom. I thought of several, and that fact that he didn't mention them means there probably aren't any animals who can do these things. But only humans wear clothing, drive motorized vehicles, harness electricity, mass produce constructed products and inventions, and create fire. And that's just off the top of my head. I'm not saying human are special among Earth species. But a LOT of single Earth species have a talent only they possess, and that doesn't detract from how cool the talent is.
Speaking of which, the biggest laugh of the episode was Tyson's line about male fireflies' "glow-blocking". "Man, that's cold." Frankly, Neil, as far as sinister behavior goes, it's not ever going to top the first part of Ashoka's reign. But point taken, and funny one-liner appreciated. Carl Sagan never really did those.
Still, not my favorite episode. **1/2.
Cosmos: Possible Worlds "Lost City Of Life"
That Cosmic Calendar really makes it easier to keep things straight on this show.
I loved the story of how Goldschmidt constantly outwitted the Nazis in WWII. Riveting.
The stuff inside the water filled Saturn moon was wondrous.
I love that this show often gets Patrick Stewart to do voice work as some of the cartoon characters.
Great episode. ****1/2.
Cosmos: Possible Worlds "Vavilov"
That was amazing. I learned so much about history. Stalin and Lisenko were truly bad guys. It says how dull-witted Stalin actually was when Hitler was smarter than him about seeing the value of the seed bank. I never even heard of the seed bank before and I now learned that it probably saved my life. Amazing.
The different animation styles were great but the stop-motion sequences in Russia were truly stunning.
Seth MacFarlane's voice cameo as the Russian film-reel announcer was both funny and vaguely offensive.
I loved every second of this. *****.
Cosmos: Possible Worlds "The Cosmic Connectome"
That gave me a lot to think about.
Neil DeGrasse Tyson expressed an interesting opinion that I don't agree with. He mentioned that as bad as bigotry was in the past, since it was systemic throughout past society, misguided people like Broca perhaps should be forgiven for it. I don't agree with that, but he raised an interesting argument: Maybe a hundred years from now there will be beliefs that I currently have that are considered unforgivable by a future, more enlightened society. I think that's interesting to think about, and I can think of a couple of bad things society currently engages in that get little pushback (but that should). The first is killing animals. I expect that within fifty years science we'll be able to come up with alternate food sources that give the same great taste that meat does artificially. I think the Impossible Whopper is just the beginning. Therefore, I expect in a couple of generations people will question my barbarism of eating meat now. I also expect that the fact that segments of our society mercilessly mock and make fun of stupid people will also be frowned upon centuries from now (if those stupid people don't wind up getting us all killed before then). But those future evolved societies can go to Hell for thinking less of me for that because they probably won't have to live with them.
But do you notice the similarity both of those things have in common? There are people alive NOW, against, and in the case of killing animals, strongly, those practices. Just like even when racism was endemic in society, there were people who stood against it. Very few, but it's not like they didn't exist. What that tells me is that people back then don't get a free pass. Right is right and wrong is wrong no matter when it happens. Similarly, if a future society feels superior enough to look down on me for eating meat or making fun of dumb people, that's okay, because on some level I know I shouldn't be doing those things. Also, Tyson neglects to mention that those "unforgivable" bigotries are very much currently acceptable to a LARGE segment of society in 2020. I would argue that in the last four years they have actually come back in fashion. The reason I don't give past societies a pass on systemic racism is because systemic racist still very much exists, and is in fact entrenched. Until then my opinion of past societies will never be softened by it supposedly being a sign of the times. It's a sign of ALL times, including ours. It's still wrong and unforgivable.
I was fascinated by the story of the goofy scientist who spent his life searching for psychic powers and wound up creating the E.E.G. instead. It's amazing he committed suicide due to feelings of failure and inadequacy when he created that wonder that is still in use today.
I thought the visual effects as we traveled inside the grain of sand were quite marvelous. Tyson makes a compelling case that if the Universe runs under steady physics laws it can potentially be knowable. I personally find that to be a bit of wishful thinking, and possibly even human hubris, but the math he's using actually checks out there. I just don't believe the Universe's laws are purposeful as he thinks they are. That feeling of a muddled, chaotic Universe he described is how I've felt every morning since I've woken up for the past four years in this country. Tyson's positive view of our knowing the Universe might not be hubris or narcissism. It might simply be optimism. Of which I do not share.
Fascinating stuff that made me question my prejudices, which is always healthy. ****.
Fargo "Camp Elegance"
Rabbi is awesome. He went all out to protect that kid, and give him the choice he never got. I love that character. Unreservedly.
After that opening scene, I'm starting to think Gaetano's reputation as a criminal mastermind is entirely unearned. What a dope.
Speaking of which, I love that Odis is left with no good options, and is screwed no matter what. For some reason I hate that character more than most of the others this season, despite not having done as much horrible stuff as some. It's his attitude I don't like and every inch of his discomfort and alarm here makes me smile.
Good for Josto for not even dignifying New York's orders to make amends with his brother as something that could seriously happen. Gaetano is the entire reason this mess is happening at all. I also question the idea that Gaetano has friends back home. Have they actually MET the guy? This is the precise type of person who is NOT built for friends. Sociopaths gotta sociopath.
What is going on with Oraetta? What is the point of her storyline? I've questioned Ethelrida's place in the narrative too, but at least her stuff is connected with Loy and her aunts. Mayflower is just an annoying loose end that so far doesn't seem to serve any purpose. I get the notion of having a "wild card" in a story. But a given story should usually have a hint of how the card could be played, good or bad. At present, she's so much confusing nonsense with a bad accent. Not a fan of the character or her arc so far.
Honestly? I roundly disliked last week. This episode is getting things a bit back on track. ***1/2.