Scenes From A Wedding, pt. 2
So. The ceremony.
We agreed from the beginning that the most important thing was that it needed to reflect who we are, that we wanted people to walk away thinking "That was so them!". That meant a minimum of formality, a maximum amount of sass and humor, and just the right amount of earnestness sprinkled throughout. We asked Vinny (umkinda) to officiate for us, because he's a master of mixing sass with earnestness, and because like most of his people, he's willing to work on the cheap. How many wedding are officiated by the ex of one of the spouses? I'm guessing not many, but it worked out real well for us.
Vinny interviewed both of us, separately, about important events in our lives leading up to when we met, syncing up where we were and what we were doing at certain points over over those years. He then weaved together a history of us from both of our individual perspectives, illustrating all the twists and turns that brought us together. It was funny - we were all three laughing through most of us - but poignant as well, and ended on a note that made us all tear up. From the ending:
And here we are at the intersection of these two very long roads. This is the incredible thing. If they had met a couple of years earlier they would have had boyfriends, totally different situations, and if they would have met later they would have had different lives and distractions... It's timing. It's always timing. That two people leading busy lives in very different places of the country could suddenly find their paths cross at just the right time, in just the right place... It's just mindblowing when serendipity pulls a coup of this magnitude.
That's why we're here to celebrate these two friends of ours. Life gets in the way, so often. We can barely be ourselves, we can barely find the keys to our car, and yet... people have been on the moon. All of these things in our way and yet people manage to do miracles, every day. Just like how two people from two very different worlds could find themselves in love on a Futon in Chicago.
It can get pretty amazing out there. Here's to Sean and Matty.
Cue tears. And applause.
But before Vinny read his piece, we had two other readings. We decided to add these kind of at the last minute, each picking a friend to do one and allowing them free reign to do whatever they wanted. This is why it pays to have smart, creative friends - who know how to work under deadline. Sean picked his friend Amy who he's known since his Chicago theater days. I picked Owen murphy, thinking it was fitting since Sean and I met at his apartment (and more specifically, on his futon) years ago.
Amy's piece was a reading from The Book Of Joan, as translated by Christina. I'll be honest in that I wasn't sure about it when Sean first told me what she was doing. But when she sent us a first draft I read the first two paragraphs and was completely sold. A sample:
Love is understanding that sometimes spouses must work together to move the plant to discover the dirt hidden beneath. Be not annoyed toward each other.
So spaketh Joan: I'm not mad at you. I'm mad at the dirt.
Seeing as that's just about my all time favorite movie quote, I couldn't have been happier to have it read at my wedding.
Owen used the fact of his futon being the place where Sean and I first became acquainted as the inspiration for his piece, an ode to his futon - which was amazing. He got bonus laughs for the inevitable crouton-futon rhyme. And he kicked it into overdrive when at the end he whipped out a plaque he had made for said futon. From the poem:
It reads: The Mishkoff-Abley Memorial Futon
and the date to make it perfectly clear
and then 4 simple words there can be no dispute on...
"Something beautiful started here"
Neither Sean nor I knew anything about the plaque, and there are pictures of us both simultaneously gasping at the big reveal. It was a true highlight of the event, and a moment I'll never forget.
After Amy, Owen, and then Vinny had done their bits, Sean and I exchanged vows (which I'll post later) and rings and then were presented to those assembled. And to top it all off, because the day hadn't been sufficiently gay enough, we walked out while the theme from "Xanadu" played (and for those that know me, you'll know just how happy that made me).
We agreed from the beginning that the most important thing was that it needed to reflect who we are, that we wanted people to walk away thinking "That was so them!". That meant a minimum of formality, a maximum amount of sass and humor, and just the right amount of earnestness sprinkled throughout. We asked Vinny (umkinda) to officiate for us, because he's a master of mixing sass with earnestness, and because like most of his people, he's willing to work on the cheap. How many wedding are officiated by the ex of one of the spouses? I'm guessing not many, but it worked out real well for us.
Vinny interviewed both of us, separately, about important events in our lives leading up to when we met, syncing up where we were and what we were doing at certain points over over those years. He then weaved together a history of us from both of our individual perspectives, illustrating all the twists and turns that brought us together. It was funny - we were all three laughing through most of us - but poignant as well, and ended on a note that made us all tear up. From the ending:
And here we are at the intersection of these two very long roads. This is the incredible thing. If they had met a couple of years earlier they would have had boyfriends, totally different situations, and if they would have met later they would have had different lives and distractions... It's timing. It's always timing. That two people leading busy lives in very different places of the country could suddenly find their paths cross at just the right time, in just the right place... It's just mindblowing when serendipity pulls a coup of this magnitude.
That's why we're here to celebrate these two friends of ours. Life gets in the way, so often. We can barely be ourselves, we can barely find the keys to our car, and yet... people have been on the moon. All of these things in our way and yet people manage to do miracles, every day. Just like how two people from two very different worlds could find themselves in love on a Futon in Chicago.
It can get pretty amazing out there. Here's to Sean and Matty.
Cue tears. And applause.
But before Vinny read his piece, we had two other readings. We decided to add these kind of at the last minute, each picking a friend to do one and allowing them free reign to do whatever they wanted. This is why it pays to have smart, creative friends - who know how to work under deadline. Sean picked his friend Amy who he's known since his Chicago theater days. I picked Owen murphy, thinking it was fitting since Sean and I met at his apartment (and more specifically, on his futon) years ago.
Amy's piece was a reading from The Book Of Joan, as translated by Christina. I'll be honest in that I wasn't sure about it when Sean first told me what she was doing. But when she sent us a first draft I read the first two paragraphs and was completely sold. A sample:
Love is understanding that sometimes spouses must work together to move the plant to discover the dirt hidden beneath. Be not annoyed toward each other.
So spaketh Joan: I'm not mad at you. I'm mad at the dirt.
Seeing as that's just about my all time favorite movie quote, I couldn't have been happier to have it read at my wedding.
Owen used the fact of his futon being the place where Sean and I first became acquainted as the inspiration for his piece, an ode to his futon - which was amazing. He got bonus laughs for the inevitable crouton-futon rhyme. And he kicked it into overdrive when at the end he whipped out a plaque he had made for said futon. From the poem:
It reads: The Mishkoff-Abley Memorial Futon
and the date to make it perfectly clear
and then 4 simple words there can be no dispute on...
"Something beautiful started here"
Neither Sean nor I knew anything about the plaque, and there are pictures of us both simultaneously gasping at the big reveal. It was a true highlight of the event, and a moment I'll never forget.
After Amy, Owen, and then Vinny had done their bits, Sean and I exchanged vows (which I'll post later) and rings and then were presented to those assembled. And to top it all off, because the day hadn't been sufficiently gay enough, we walked out while the theme from "Xanadu" played (and for those that know me, you'll know just how happy that made me).