going south for the not winter

[mattsterweb]

Begin Transmission - 231

WHAT WILL I NEED

Cat. 1: All the normal crap you take on vacation
- Twelve pairs of underwear (and something to swim in, maybe)
- Eleven pairs of socks
- Ten T-shirts
- Nine pairs of trousers
- Eight hats
- Seven pairs of shoes
- Six jumpers
- Five toothbrushes
- Four toothpaste tubes (preferably full)
- Three deodorant cans
- Two wads of money
- A partridge in a pear tree

Cat. 2: Entertainment
- Wii (console; power cable; coloured thingy cable; sensor bar; stand; 2 remotes; 2 nunchucks; Wii Sports; Wii Play)
- GameCube games (5?)
- Wavebird controller
- Talisman
- Coin collection
- MP3 player
- DVDs (Goodies; Little Britain Live; Beavis & Butt-head; Thank God You're Here; Glass House; Ross Noble)
- I want you to play with my dingaling

Cat. 3: Items that exist solely in the author's dreams
- A barrel of monkeys
- Shark repellent
- Mint-flavoured condoms

Actually... NO! I WILL NOT BRING THE CATEGORY 3 ITEMS DOWN, INSTEAD I WILL MARKET THEM AS COMPLETELY NEW PRODUCTS AND/OR HUMOROUS ADDITIONS TO RETRO ACTION MOVIES

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