What time is it?
"FUCK THIS GAME!!! It's four in the morning grandma. YOU WIN!!!" - Dane Cook
I can't sleep. Or, at least, it's getting harder for me to go to sleep at night. I can't think of what it is i need to do. I just can't sleep now. Maybe ever. I don't know what's gotten into me. It's not like I don't wanna sleep. In fact, I know that I need to sleep or else I'll be really tired in the morning. I guess more things are on my mind now.
With the election over, things are starting to settle down. I mean some people are still pretty pissed about what happened and all that, but others are generally happy that it's behind us now. For me, I just wish that I didn't feel like the things that I need to do right now would weigh so much on my shoulders. And it's not so much the weight of my approval or disapproval, it's all the things society has placed on my back. Conformity is farily over rated in my opinion. But for me to go anywhere in this world I need to be their puppet. I need to follow the rules set by society. Not that they're hard rules, it's just that many of them are made by people who don't know where I'm coming from and want me to play their game.
College is fun. But in so many ways it's a lot like High School was and that kills me. I would like to believe that all that has been left behind in High School, but I doubt it. In fact I'm sure that it continues well into my "adult" life. However, my life is what I make of it. So maybe this is the day when I stop putting up with this kind of shit. But I doubt that.
Right now I really feel like I'm talking out of my ass. But at the same time I know that I'll try to continue doing what I do best. Live. And maybe one day, I'll be able to live without expectations from anyone but myself. I'm sick of having others run my life. I know that I am free to come and go as I please, but even then there are certain restrictions on that.
I'm done for now. I'll come back on this when I think more about it. It's just one of those sleepless nights.