thinking...
So today I died.
Here's the story. For the second year, I was involved in the "Prom Promise" program that is designed to enlighten people about the drunk driving. Last year, we were under sheets and then they told a story about how we died, then we got up and blew out a candle. This year, we stood behing a curtain, and after our scenario was described, we said our "I wish" statement. The majority of them were "I wish i would have told me parents I loved them." It became a pretty generic answer. I had to think of mine on the spot, and the main thing that kept coming into my thoughts were if I were really dead, would they miss me on June 3rd? So my response was "I wish I still had the oppurunity to walk on stage with my friends in June." I kept thinking about running and huggin ace, seeing my mom's tear-filled eyes, the moment we finally throw our hats in the air. What if today was real? What if I really wasn't there? What if Mr. DHS, Most School Spirit was not even at the graduation ceremony because he wasn't alive. I wonder if people even thought about that today. Not just me, dont think im conceited, if any one of us had actually been gone. Would we be missed? Or would people continue to laugh during programs like this? Now granted, it could have been better. The stories should have been more true. (Mine said that me and Janel had a few drinks and my car got totaled -- anybody who knows me knows that there is a BIG problem with that). They should have been more in your face. Actually take someone out of the entire school, not just put a shirt on em and say "dont talk". Hell, put on a mock funeral or something. I wish I would have ran this thing. Maybe because this whole situation hits close to home. Whenever the usual gang of people started talking and laughing, Coach Nichols snapped on them and started saying how he had been to too many of his students funerals. If you listened closely, you could tell he was on the verge of tears. I have shed those tears. More than three years ago. The ironic thing is that for some reason, I have been thinking about Connie a lot lately, and then that happenned. The more and more I keep thinking about graduation, I think about how she never got to take part in hers. She never got to dance at her senior prom. All of that was taken away from her because she made a decision to get in a vehicle she shouldn't have. She should still be here. I miss her a lot. This program today made me think of that. I just hope, as Ashley so "sweetly" put it, that everyone is back in school Monday night. And to all those that want to have a "little more fun" at Keyo's Friday night, the same goes for them.
I thought a senior year was supposed to be great. Now, don't get me wrong, I've had my share of fun things -- Homecoming Day, the car wash, following the baseball team in the playoffs, meeting new people. All that I am thankful for. It just sucks that Menudo doesnt have a house, Hedman is dealing with someone leaving him, ALL my friends (and myself) are stressing out due to money, and my home is crumbling before my eyes. Every day its the same thing. It's like opening a book and reading the same page. And that page is the page that u hate, the one that you want to turn over to see what happens. This summer, I will turn that page. I am so ready to get out of here. Not away from everybody, cuz Lord knows that without them I prolly wouldnt even be here typing this. But out of Daleville. I want to get in my apartment. I want to see my family in July.
In closing i just want to say that lately, I am actually "hearing" songs. 3 Doors Down - "Let Me Go" and Yellowcard - "Only One" all have powerful lyrics now that I really listen to em. Those songs hit too hard sometimes.
I hate Dairy Queen, July is not coming fast enough.
To my friends, thanks for keeping me laughing and smiling, even though it may be gay sometimes (sorry).
Here's the story. For the second year, I was involved in the "Prom Promise" program that is designed to enlighten people about the drunk driving. Last year, we were under sheets and then they told a story about how we died, then we got up and blew out a candle. This year, we stood behing a curtain, and after our scenario was described, we said our "I wish" statement. The majority of them were "I wish i would have told me parents I loved them." It became a pretty generic answer. I had to think of mine on the spot, and the main thing that kept coming into my thoughts were if I were really dead, would they miss me on June 3rd? So my response was "I wish I still had the oppurunity to walk on stage with my friends in June." I kept thinking about running and huggin ace, seeing my mom's tear-filled eyes, the moment we finally throw our hats in the air. What if today was real? What if I really wasn't there? What if Mr. DHS, Most School Spirit was not even at the graduation ceremony because he wasn't alive. I wonder if people even thought about that today. Not just me, dont think im conceited, if any one of us had actually been gone. Would we be missed? Or would people continue to laugh during programs like this? Now granted, it could have been better. The stories should have been more true. (Mine said that me and Janel had a few drinks and my car got totaled -- anybody who knows me knows that there is a BIG problem with that). They should have been more in your face. Actually take someone out of the entire school, not just put a shirt on em and say "dont talk". Hell, put on a mock funeral or something. I wish I would have ran this thing. Maybe because this whole situation hits close to home. Whenever the usual gang of people started talking and laughing, Coach Nichols snapped on them and started saying how he had been to too many of his students funerals. If you listened closely, you could tell he was on the verge of tears. I have shed those tears. More than three years ago. The ironic thing is that for some reason, I have been thinking about Connie a lot lately, and then that happenned. The more and more I keep thinking about graduation, I think about how she never got to take part in hers. She never got to dance at her senior prom. All of that was taken away from her because she made a decision to get in a vehicle she shouldn't have. She should still be here. I miss her a lot. This program today made me think of that. I just hope, as Ashley so "sweetly" put it, that everyone is back in school Monday night. And to all those that want to have a "little more fun" at Keyo's Friday night, the same goes for them.
I thought a senior year was supposed to be great. Now, don't get me wrong, I've had my share of fun things -- Homecoming Day, the car wash, following the baseball team in the playoffs, meeting new people. All that I am thankful for. It just sucks that Menudo doesnt have a house, Hedman is dealing with someone leaving him, ALL my friends (and myself) are stressing out due to money, and my home is crumbling before my eyes. Every day its the same thing. It's like opening a book and reading the same page. And that page is the page that u hate, the one that you want to turn over to see what happens. This summer, I will turn that page. I am so ready to get out of here. Not away from everybody, cuz Lord knows that without them I prolly wouldnt even be here typing this. But out of Daleville. I want to get in my apartment. I want to see my family in July.
In closing i just want to say that lately, I am actually "hearing" songs. 3 Doors Down - "Let Me Go" and Yellowcard - "Only One" all have powerful lyrics now that I really listen to em. Those songs hit too hard sometimes.
I hate Dairy Queen, July is not coming fast enough.
To my friends, thanks for keeping me laughing and smiling, even though it may be gay sometimes (sorry).