If you say so (Epilogue)
Title: If you say so
Author: Matsuaurore
Banner: Lilisan31 <3
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: Ohmiya, Sakumoto
Genre: Au, angst, romance, drama
Summary: Nino and Ohno were living a life full of happiness and love until Nino ran away for a mysterious reason, leaving only a letter to his boyfriend who was decided to pursue him until the end of the world.
Epilogue:
It started out as any other story
Then the words began to fade away.
Oh, your smile used to make me smile
But lately I don't feel that way.
Six months later…
Finding Nino hadn’t been very difficult.
Ohno had some doubts about what Nino talked in his letter. When they had started to date, both had found an old abandoned empty house as they were walking together in the forest. The house was in a very bad state but Satoshi had fallen in love with it, convinced that it would make a wonderful home if they made some reparations. Nino had found this idea completely stupid and insane but had agreed to help his lover, not against the idea of building something together. They spent several years at restoring this house before being able to live inside. Ohno had painted the walls, drawing something special for each room as if he was telling their story through his paintbrush. They had agreed to keep this house for their vacations and for when they would need a peaceful place far away from the paparazzi and the fans.
But as time passed, Ohno’s work started to take lots of place in their lives and they finally stopped to go there, forgetting this precious house.
****
Ohno stopped at some meters of the house. He had walked for a long time, thinking of what he would say to Nino to have him back. The house was still in the same state than before and the singer wondered if Nino had looked after it behind his back when they were still together. Seeing it brought nostalgia in his heart, making him remember all the precious moments they had spent there.
“Tsuki, come here!”
Ohno moved back behind a tree, seeing Nino leaving the house, his dog running happily outside. Tsuki barked, asking for his caress that Nino gave him with a smile. “Good boy, let’s play a bit.” The young man threw him a ball that Tsuki tried to catch before bringing it back in his master’s hands. Ohno smiled at the view, his ex-lover looked happier than some months ago. Had he move on? Had he forget him? Should he come to face him or leave him alone enjoying his new life?
“I love you Kazu.” Ohno smiled softly, leaving quietly and taking his phone. “Hello, Jun.”
“Then?”
“I have found him, he is safe.”
“Did you talk to him?”
“No. He was playing with Tsuki and he looked happy. I didn’t want to bother him.”
“Baka! Talk to him, you have to face each other!”
“Maybe I was wrong. Maybe he will be happier without me.”
“Bullshit! It’s just because you’re scared.”
“Yes, I am. But I love him and if he left, it means he needs time.”
“It’s been six months, Ohchan!”
“I know! But if he rejected me once again?! If this time he told me face to face he doesn’t want me anymore?! I’m not saying I give up but I think I have to wait a bit, to let him some time alone. I have the feeling he needs time, I have to be patient once more.”
“Fine… But don’t give up on him, please.”
“I swear.” Ohno said softly before hanging up. Things were going well with his divorce. Of course, it had made a big scandal but like she promised, Suzuka hadn’t revealed he was gay and let him see Kazuya whenever he wanted to. She had taken some distance to heal her own heart but Ohno was sure she would be fine and would find someone who will love her back. She hadn’t blamed him during the conference they made to announce their divorce and had even said that he was a great father who helped her the best he could with their son.
Now, Satoshi was finally free and even if it was impossible to reveal his sexuality, the singer could say he was happy. Or at least, was a bit happier now he didn’t need to lie.
Try to remember what brought us together
And to forget what's driven us apart.
You know we can't wait here forever
Just making time, and going nowhere.
Is this our last dance?
Can we take another chance
To be alone together still?
Nino sighed, sitting on the sofa of his lodge. Things had changed a lot in six months. His single had worked very well and now, Nino was preparing an album, finally leaving the shadow he was hidden behind during all these years. People loved how he was able to touch their hearts with all the emotions he put in his songs, as if he was singing his story, his pains and his joys. His blindness had allowed him to be protected by his agency, the media were less harsh than with ‘normal’ stars and his fans were treating him with respect. Nino had moved in his and Ohno’s house, the one they had built together. It was a way to not forget the memories he had had with his ex-lover. The singer perfectly knew that Ohno could find him easily if he wanted to. It was also a way not to cut any link with his ex-boyfriend but Nino preferred to deny this feeling and think it was just because he needed a place where to live. Ohno seemed to be well, his divorce had been announced and his career was going well according to the TV and his manager.
Are we wasting time
Chasing dreams not yours or mine?
Care for you, I always will.
We can try to keep the love from fading.
'Cause all we have are reasons to be gone.
Remember when you used to make me smile?
But lately I don't feel the same.
Some months later, Nino had finally told his friends where he was living. They all tried to convince him to talk to Ohno but deep inside, Nino wasn’t ready to face him. Because even if his love was still as strong as before, his fears were stronger than ever.
“Nino, you’ve received a letter!” His manager told him.
“Oh, can you read it to me?”
“Okay, wait.” The man opened the letter and frowned. “I can’t, it’s written in Braille.”
“Eh? Can you give it to me, please?” Nino took the letter and put his fingers to read it, his eyes widening in shock.
My love,
You’ll be surprised to read this letter because of the Braille I used to write it. Jun and Aiba helped me to write in Braille, I hope I haven’t made mistakes… It’s been almost one year since you left me, again, without a word but only a letter. I have found you some months ago, of course, our paradise was and is still this wonderful house we have built together. I was about to come to you when I saw you playing with Tsuki. You were smiling sincerely and it’s what has stopped me to come. Because you looked happy and I didn’t want to make this so beautiful smile of your fade away. I told myself you needed time alone before facing me. I don’t even know if you have planned to face me, I just hope it’s the case. I miss you so much, Kazu. Being separated during these three years was a hell but losing you a second time was like diving into the darkness.
You know I’m not very good to express my feelings with words, I always feel very stupid and cheesy but if it’s for you, I guess it’s okay. I don’t want to force you to face me nor to take me back in your life. I just want you to know that I need you and I miss you so much that it’s hard to breathe without feeling this pain in my heart. You know, I understand your fears. Because I have the same. Your blindness doesn’t bother me at all, you’re still my Kazu, the one I love and the one I need to be happy. You would be disfigured that I wouldn’t care because I love you for what you are, not for your appearance. I know you are scared because you think you will be a bother for me, I also feel the same. I’m scared not to be able to help you when you need, not to understand the pains you are going through with this illness. But the scariest thing is to lose you definitely. I realize today that all these fears like being caught, not being here if you fell and hurt yourself are nothing compared to this funk to lose you. I think whatever will happen, the bad things, the fears or the sadness, all that won’t matter as long as we are together. Because together, we can’t fight the world. You’ve always believed my work was what I need to be happy but you’re wrong. I need you to be truly happy. My work is just a job, it doesn’t make me feel warmed like when I’m in your arms, it doesn’t make me exclaim a ‘meccha umai!’ like when you cook for me, it doesn’t make me feel as if I had butterflies in my stomach like when you kiss me or smile to me. The list is very long. My job brings me another happiness, a happiness that I feel when I sing but once I’m home, my most precious happiness is here, waiting for me and hugging me while whispering a ‘okaeri’. If you really want me happy, Kazu, then, let me come back in your arms. I know you are starting a career and maybe my request is just too egoist but I have promised myself not to ever give up on you unless you order me to leave your life definitively.
I have written you my new song. It’s for you and guess what? I am the one who has written it. For the first time of my life, I’ll sing something with my heart and not just with my voice. I hope it will reach you. I’ll be waiting for you next to your house, if you want to talk, then, open your door and if not, don’t worry, I won’t try anything.
With all my love,
Satoshi
Look up and I see your face.
I can see you looking back at me.
Every time I think it's getting better.
Just making time, and going nowhere.
Is this our last dance?
Can we take another chance
To be alone together still?
Nino wiped the tears on his cheeks, closing the letter.
“You should go.” His manager smiled.
“I thought you couldn’t read Braille.”
“I can’t. But I know how to recognize a love letter. Whatever it says, don’t think and go. If you keep thinking about your fears, you will regret it all your life.”
“Baka.” Nino chuckled. “Anyway, I have to go, it’s late.”
“Of course.” His manager smirked. “Let’s go.” The man drove him home and for Nino’s deception, Ohno wasn’t here. He could feel it. The singer entered his house, wondering what he was hoping for when he had clearly decided to cut any bond with Ohno.
Suddenly, Tsuki stood up and barked at the door.
“What? Do you want to pee?” Nino frowned and looked for the door handle to open to his dog that ran outside, barking happily.
“Tsuki! Calm down!” Nino left his house. “Come here!” Nino ordered before freezing when sounds of feet reached his sensitive ears. “Satoshi?”
“Hum… Hi… I didn’t think you would open the door for Tsuki.” Ohno muttered in embarrassment.
“I’ve read your letter. You’ve made some mistakes by the way.”
“Sorry, I hope you’ve understood everything…” Ohno blushed.
“Yes. Your song is very beautiful, I’ve heard you singing it. What’s its name?”
“Last dance.”
There's no looking back.
And no more need to cry.
No more need to cry.
No more need to cry.
“I… Hum…” Nino rubbed his nape in embarrassment, not knowing what to say.
“I shouldn’t have come.” Ohno sighed, turning around to leave.
“Wait!!!” Nino yelled, tears starting to roll down his cheeks. “I… You really don’t care about my blindness? About my swing moods and my useless side?”
“First, you’re not useless. And I told you it doesn’t matter for me. I would still be scared something happens to you but I want to teach you how to cook by yourself, to make you realize how beautiful you are and how much I need you. You’re not useless, Kazu, because I’m completely dependent of you, I can’t live without you.”
“Still so cheesy.” Nino blushed. “I only have one thing to say, then.”
Ohno bit his lip, ready to be rejected once again.
“Okaeri.” The singer whispered.
“What???” Ohno gasped, his mouth wide open. Did he dream Nino’s words???
“Okaeri!” Nino said louder and gasped when Ohno ran toward him and hugged him tightly.
“Tadaima.” The older whispered, diving his face in his lover’s neck, his fingers passing into Nino’s soft hair. Ohno cupped his face, bringing their lips together, tasting them with happiness and savoring them endlessly. “Tadaima…” Ohno kept whispering, kissing every part of Nino’s face he could reach, making his lover laugh happily.
“Okaeri, Satoshi.”
Owari :D
A/N: So, this time, it’s really the end xD I hope you will like this ending, to be honest, I wanted to write a sad one but I received some threats from someone (Ne, Andy :P) and decided to give up on my first idea LOL.
Our dear Ohmiya have finally found their happiness and Nino has decided to fight his fears and to trust his Ohchan J I hope you liked this fic, my next story will be a Sakuraiba/Ohmiya/Junma J Don’t hesitate to let me your thoughts, comments are always welcomed and loved <3
Author: Matsuaurore
Banner: Lilisan31 <3
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: Ohmiya, Sakumoto
Genre: Au, angst, romance, drama
Summary: Nino and Ohno were living a life full of happiness and love until Nino ran away for a mysterious reason, leaving only a letter to his boyfriend who was decided to pursue him until the end of the world.
Epilogue:
It started out as any other story
Then the words began to fade away.
Oh, your smile used to make me smile
But lately I don't feel that way.
Six months later…
Finding Nino hadn’t been very difficult.
Ohno had some doubts about what Nino talked in his letter. When they had started to date, both had found an old abandoned empty house as they were walking together in the forest. The house was in a very bad state but Satoshi had fallen in love with it, convinced that it would make a wonderful home if they made some reparations. Nino had found this idea completely stupid and insane but had agreed to help his lover, not against the idea of building something together. They spent several years at restoring this house before being able to live inside. Ohno had painted the walls, drawing something special for each room as if he was telling their story through his paintbrush. They had agreed to keep this house for their vacations and for when they would need a peaceful place far away from the paparazzi and the fans.
But as time passed, Ohno’s work started to take lots of place in their lives and they finally stopped to go there, forgetting this precious house.
****
Ohno stopped at some meters of the house. He had walked for a long time, thinking of what he would say to Nino to have him back. The house was still in the same state than before and the singer wondered if Nino had looked after it behind his back when they were still together. Seeing it brought nostalgia in his heart, making him remember all the precious moments they had spent there.
“Tsuki, come here!”
Ohno moved back behind a tree, seeing Nino leaving the house, his dog running happily outside. Tsuki barked, asking for his caress that Nino gave him with a smile. “Good boy, let’s play a bit.” The young man threw him a ball that Tsuki tried to catch before bringing it back in his master’s hands. Ohno smiled at the view, his ex-lover looked happier than some months ago. Had he move on? Had he forget him? Should he come to face him or leave him alone enjoying his new life?
“I love you Kazu.” Ohno smiled softly, leaving quietly and taking his phone. “Hello, Jun.”
“Then?”
“I have found him, he is safe.”
“Did you talk to him?”
“No. He was playing with Tsuki and he looked happy. I didn’t want to bother him.”
“Baka! Talk to him, you have to face each other!”
“Maybe I was wrong. Maybe he will be happier without me.”
“Bullshit! It’s just because you’re scared.”
“Yes, I am. But I love him and if he left, it means he needs time.”
“It’s been six months, Ohchan!”
“I know! But if he rejected me once again?! If this time he told me face to face he doesn’t want me anymore?! I’m not saying I give up but I think I have to wait a bit, to let him some time alone. I have the feeling he needs time, I have to be patient once more.”
“Fine… But don’t give up on him, please.”
“I swear.” Ohno said softly before hanging up. Things were going well with his divorce. Of course, it had made a big scandal but like she promised, Suzuka hadn’t revealed he was gay and let him see Kazuya whenever he wanted to. She had taken some distance to heal her own heart but Ohno was sure she would be fine and would find someone who will love her back. She hadn’t blamed him during the conference they made to announce their divorce and had even said that he was a great father who helped her the best he could with their son.
Now, Satoshi was finally free and even if it was impossible to reveal his sexuality, the singer could say he was happy. Or at least, was a bit happier now he didn’t need to lie.
Try to remember what brought us together
And to forget what's driven us apart.
You know we can't wait here forever
Just making time, and going nowhere.
Is this our last dance?
Can we take another chance
To be alone together still?
Nino sighed, sitting on the sofa of his lodge. Things had changed a lot in six months. His single had worked very well and now, Nino was preparing an album, finally leaving the shadow he was hidden behind during all these years. People loved how he was able to touch their hearts with all the emotions he put in his songs, as if he was singing his story, his pains and his joys. His blindness had allowed him to be protected by his agency, the media were less harsh than with ‘normal’ stars and his fans were treating him with respect. Nino had moved in his and Ohno’s house, the one they had built together. It was a way to not forget the memories he had had with his ex-lover. The singer perfectly knew that Ohno could find him easily if he wanted to. It was also a way not to cut any link with his ex-boyfriend but Nino preferred to deny this feeling and think it was just because he needed a place where to live. Ohno seemed to be well, his divorce had been announced and his career was going well according to the TV and his manager.
Are we wasting time
Chasing dreams not yours or mine?
Care for you, I always will.
We can try to keep the love from fading.
'Cause all we have are reasons to be gone.
Remember when you used to make me smile?
But lately I don't feel the same.
Some months later, Nino had finally told his friends where he was living. They all tried to convince him to talk to Ohno but deep inside, Nino wasn’t ready to face him. Because even if his love was still as strong as before, his fears were stronger than ever.
“Nino, you’ve received a letter!” His manager told him.
“Oh, can you read it to me?”
“Okay, wait.” The man opened the letter and frowned. “I can’t, it’s written in Braille.”
“Eh? Can you give it to me, please?” Nino took the letter and put his fingers to read it, his eyes widening in shock.
My love,
You’ll be surprised to read this letter because of the Braille I used to write it. Jun and Aiba helped me to write in Braille, I hope I haven’t made mistakes… It’s been almost one year since you left me, again, without a word but only a letter. I have found you some months ago, of course, our paradise was and is still this wonderful house we have built together. I was about to come to you when I saw you playing with Tsuki. You were smiling sincerely and it’s what has stopped me to come. Because you looked happy and I didn’t want to make this so beautiful smile of your fade away. I told myself you needed time alone before facing me. I don’t even know if you have planned to face me, I just hope it’s the case. I miss you so much, Kazu. Being separated during these three years was a hell but losing you a second time was like diving into the darkness.
You know I’m not very good to express my feelings with words, I always feel very stupid and cheesy but if it’s for you, I guess it’s okay. I don’t want to force you to face me nor to take me back in your life. I just want you to know that I need you and I miss you so much that it’s hard to breathe without feeling this pain in my heart. You know, I understand your fears. Because I have the same. Your blindness doesn’t bother me at all, you’re still my Kazu, the one I love and the one I need to be happy. You would be disfigured that I wouldn’t care because I love you for what you are, not for your appearance. I know you are scared because you think you will be a bother for me, I also feel the same. I’m scared not to be able to help you when you need, not to understand the pains you are going through with this illness. But the scariest thing is to lose you definitely. I realize today that all these fears like being caught, not being here if you fell and hurt yourself are nothing compared to this funk to lose you. I think whatever will happen, the bad things, the fears or the sadness, all that won’t matter as long as we are together. Because together, we can’t fight the world. You’ve always believed my work was what I need to be happy but you’re wrong. I need you to be truly happy. My work is just a job, it doesn’t make me feel warmed like when I’m in your arms, it doesn’t make me exclaim a ‘meccha umai!’ like when you cook for me, it doesn’t make me feel as if I had butterflies in my stomach like when you kiss me or smile to me. The list is very long. My job brings me another happiness, a happiness that I feel when I sing but once I’m home, my most precious happiness is here, waiting for me and hugging me while whispering a ‘okaeri’. If you really want me happy, Kazu, then, let me come back in your arms. I know you are starting a career and maybe my request is just too egoist but I have promised myself not to ever give up on you unless you order me to leave your life definitively.
I have written you my new song. It’s for you and guess what? I am the one who has written it. For the first time of my life, I’ll sing something with my heart and not just with my voice. I hope it will reach you. I’ll be waiting for you next to your house, if you want to talk, then, open your door and if not, don’t worry, I won’t try anything.
With all my love,
Satoshi
Look up and I see your face.
I can see you looking back at me.
Every time I think it's getting better.
Just making time, and going nowhere.
Is this our last dance?
Can we take another chance
To be alone together still?
Nino wiped the tears on his cheeks, closing the letter.
“You should go.” His manager smiled.
“I thought you couldn’t read Braille.”
“I can’t. But I know how to recognize a love letter. Whatever it says, don’t think and go. If you keep thinking about your fears, you will regret it all your life.”
“Baka.” Nino chuckled. “Anyway, I have to go, it’s late.”
“Of course.” His manager smirked. “Let’s go.” The man drove him home and for Nino’s deception, Ohno wasn’t here. He could feel it. The singer entered his house, wondering what he was hoping for when he had clearly decided to cut any bond with Ohno.
Suddenly, Tsuki stood up and barked at the door.
“What? Do you want to pee?” Nino frowned and looked for the door handle to open to his dog that ran outside, barking happily.
“Tsuki! Calm down!” Nino left his house. “Come here!” Nino ordered before freezing when sounds of feet reached his sensitive ears. “Satoshi?”
“Hum… Hi… I didn’t think you would open the door for Tsuki.” Ohno muttered in embarrassment.
“I’ve read your letter. You’ve made some mistakes by the way.”
“Sorry, I hope you’ve understood everything…” Ohno blushed.
“Yes. Your song is very beautiful, I’ve heard you singing it. What’s its name?”
“Last dance.”
There's no looking back.
And no more need to cry.
No more need to cry.
No more need to cry.
“I… Hum…” Nino rubbed his nape in embarrassment, not knowing what to say.
“I shouldn’t have come.” Ohno sighed, turning around to leave.
“Wait!!!” Nino yelled, tears starting to roll down his cheeks. “I… You really don’t care about my blindness? About my swing moods and my useless side?”
“First, you’re not useless. And I told you it doesn’t matter for me. I would still be scared something happens to you but I want to teach you how to cook by yourself, to make you realize how beautiful you are and how much I need you. You’re not useless, Kazu, because I’m completely dependent of you, I can’t live without you.”
“Still so cheesy.” Nino blushed. “I only have one thing to say, then.”
Ohno bit his lip, ready to be rejected once again.
“Okaeri.” The singer whispered.
“What???” Ohno gasped, his mouth wide open. Did he dream Nino’s words???
“Okaeri!” Nino said louder and gasped when Ohno ran toward him and hugged him tightly.
“Tadaima.” The older whispered, diving his face in his lover’s neck, his fingers passing into Nino’s soft hair. Ohno cupped his face, bringing their lips together, tasting them with happiness and savoring them endlessly. “Tadaima…” Ohno kept whispering, kissing every part of Nino’s face he could reach, making his lover laugh happily.
“Okaeri, Satoshi.”
Owari :D
A/N: So, this time, it’s really the end xD I hope you will like this ending, to be honest, I wanted to write a sad one but I received some threats from someone (Ne, Andy :P) and decided to give up on my first idea LOL.
Our dear Ohmiya have finally found their happiness and Nino has decided to fight his fears and to trust his Ohchan J I hope you liked this fic, my next story will be a Sakuraiba/Ohmiya/Junma J Don’t hesitate to let me your thoughts, comments are always welcomed and loved <3