A LEAVE OF ABSENCE
The following is a sincere apology to those of you whose very lives have been put on indefinite hold in the interim between the last passage and this one. I need to stop being so selfish and realize that there are legions of sheep, nay, absolute AUTOMATONS that thirst for my words as if they were the sweet nectar of the gods. It was sheer greed, and nothing short of it, that drove me to keep my thoughts to myself for the past ten days, and for a few agonizing moments I almost convinced myself that I should perhaps stop this foolish channeling of my wisdom to others, that it was merely a ploy to infuse the readers' naive minds with my REAL agenda, my impending Presidential campaign in 2004.
But, needless to say, this keyboard sucked me back in just like the lovely ladies of the Tokyo Bathhouse. Oh, sweet Xiang Choixya Ngyuyen, how your name flows from the tongue like the purest of poetry. Anyhow, like I was saying, I couldn't keep the thousands of adoring fans waiting forever, so here I sit. And so far, all I can come up with to write is the fact that I know I SHOULD write, yet I can't. Writers block. I list it only second to herpes of the eyelid in order of my least favorite things. No wait, it's third. I almost forgot about George Bush.
As I read my "friends" journals, I see such vibrant, exciting things going on for other people. Doing things, living their lives, making a difference in the world, and... oh wait, no they aren't. I don't feel so bad now. In fact, today I paid my cable bill, bought a new tail-light for my car, and went grocery shopping. I've had a VERY productive day, yo! I don't see anyone ELSE on LiveJournal buying freaking TAILLIGHTS! You people got no skillz! When I paid the cable bill, the girl behind the counter gave me a knowing smile, and at the time, I had no idea what it meant, but now I get it! She knew that I was living in the MOMENT! She knew that I was, at that moment, getting stuff DONE! Yeah, take my money! Life is too short to not do things like pay cable bills! All you non-cable-bill-paying fanatics better watch out, because the Schnak says piss or get the hell off the toilet! COMING THROUGH! (damn, I do kinda have to pee...finally, something to do.)
But, needless to say, this keyboard sucked me back in just like the lovely ladies of the Tokyo Bathhouse. Oh, sweet Xiang Choixya Ngyuyen, how your name flows from the tongue like the purest of poetry. Anyhow, like I was saying, I couldn't keep the thousands of adoring fans waiting forever, so here I sit. And so far, all I can come up with to write is the fact that I know I SHOULD write, yet I can't. Writers block. I list it only second to herpes of the eyelid in order of my least favorite things. No wait, it's third. I almost forgot about George Bush.
As I read my "friends" journals, I see such vibrant, exciting things going on for other people. Doing things, living their lives, making a difference in the world, and... oh wait, no they aren't. I don't feel so bad now. In fact, today I paid my cable bill, bought a new tail-light for my car, and went grocery shopping. I've had a VERY productive day, yo! I don't see anyone ELSE on LiveJournal buying freaking TAILLIGHTS! You people got no skillz! When I paid the cable bill, the girl behind the counter gave me a knowing smile, and at the time, I had no idea what it meant, but now I get it! She knew that I was living in the MOMENT! She knew that I was, at that moment, getting stuff DONE! Yeah, take my money! Life is too short to not do things like pay cable bills! All you non-cable-bill-paying fanatics better watch out, because the Schnak says piss or get the hell off the toilet! COMING THROUGH! (damn, I do kinda have to pee...finally, something to do.)