Things I Have Learned Since Coming to California

[mathnerd]

It's hard to believe that three weeks ago I was frantically cleaning my old apartment in Eugene trying to get everything done to hand keys in. It simultaneously feels longer ago and much more recently. Anyhow, I wanted to write up a list of things I have learned in those three weeks. So, without further ado...

The List of Things I Have Learned Since Coming to California


• Pumping your own gas is no big deal. Washing your own windshield is no big deal. One really wonders how desperate OR must be for minimum wage jobs in order to make pumping one's own gas illegal.
• When I drive for fifteen hours at a time, the problem won't be sleepiness or inattention or boredom. It will be that I am still too tall for my car and my legs will go numb after four to six hours of holding still. (Note to self: check if I have cruise control in Iggy.)
• Electric stoves take forever to heat, tend to heat on the lower end of the energy scale, and are no big deal. Gas stoves are hot instantly and will heat pot handles even when they stick way off to the side. Potholders are a girl's best friend in the kitchen.
• When spaghetti spills on a gas stove, it will catch on fire instantly. Turn off the gas, blow out the spaghetti, move the pans, clean up the mess, turn the heat back on.
• Side note to above: you can turn the heat off under something that's boiling to clean up a mess and turn the heat back on a few minutes later on a gas stove. The pot will start boiling again within a minute or two.
• Telemarketers speaking Spanish will be politer and immediately place you on the Do Not Call list if you tell them you don't want telephone solicitations.
• Crying in the elevator when the old-fashioned gate is being stubborn and you can't get your boxes out is not a good idea. Men who live in the building will come rushing up the stairs to make sure you aren't being attacked/molested.
• Showing up at a specific Starbucks six days in a row staying there for multiple hours each time qualifies you as a regular. Baristas will joke with you when you come in, and free espresso shots will show up on your table every few hours.
• Drivers expect you to stay with the flow of traffic, even when it's 20 mph above the posted speed limit. As long as you do this and don't deliberately cut anyone off, CA drivers will be much nicer to deal with than OR drivers.
• The body adapts very quickly to new climates. Expect to need a jacket/sweatshirt if the temp is below 80 and/or there is a breeze blowing.
• Even grumpy bus drivers respond well to cheerful, sincere thank-yous and wishes of a pleasant day/evening/night.
• Homeless guys hanging out in bus shelters are amazingly good resources when you can't find the right bus and need to get to a specific location.
• Jamba Juice guys have no problem filling up your stamp card (five punches for one drink) to help you reach your free drink before the promotion expiry date.
• Side note to above: Jamba Juice guys really like it when you show appreciation for what they have just done for you.
• 20% of the world will say "ma'am" and "usted", 80% will say "honey" and "sweetie" and "hijita".
• Parking is a lot cheaper in most parts of LA (excluding Beverly Hills and UCLA campus) than in Eugene.
• Grocery and gas prices in LA are equivalent to Eugene. Rent prices are double those of Eugene. Car insurance prices are more than double those of Eugene.
• Geico is a ripoff in SoCal sometimes. (Mental note to self: in March, switch to State Farm.)
• Becoming independent, starting grad school, and moving 1,000 miles away is all that is needed to turn Papa into a helicopter parent. He will suddenly want to know where your office is on campus, have no problem swinging by to take you to IKEA and to dinner before leaving again, and praise you for finding a nice apartment and getting it set up neatly.
• Kids on the bus will still be randomly attracted to you, even if there is a language barrier. Mothers will not be too worried. Small girls will ask you to dance with them in the Metro. Your age peers will ignore you or giggle. Adults will smile approvingly.
• Ten year old neighbours will come to your door when they have locked themselves out of their apartments and their mothers are working a night shift. The correct response is to introduce yourself, let him in, take the screen out of your window, let him out through the window onto the roof, watch until he has crossed the roof and removed the screen to his apartment's window, make sure he's in safely, replace your window screen, and return to listening to Harry Potter and the Sorceror's Stone on iTunes.
• Ladies at the post office like compliments on their insanely poofy hair. This will make them forgive you for having no idea how to send a modem to Clearwire in NV and they will help you through the whole thing.
• Ask and ye shall receive. The furniture store next door will happily lend you a dolly to move five heavy boxes of books upstairs.
• Laundry is as cheap as Eugene and twice as fast.
• Advisers mean well and know nothing about paperwork or details. Go ask another grad student or bug the heck out of Anderson's administrative assistant for that information.
• UCLA loves silly bear related puns. Examples include: "University Records Student Access" (URSA = bear in Latin), construction notices asking you to "bear with us while we renovate", and reminders that "Energy waste is hard to bear" on doors that need to stay closed.
• An iPod guarantees that the hour-long one-way commute to campus is manageable.
• I need to draw up detailed schedules and lunch plans tomorrow for my first term. I also need to get ready to pack lunches the night before since I still have issues waking up on time.