living in clip

[matedealma]

this fucking hurts...this wrenches at my gut trying forcefully to yank everything i have inside out of my mouth.

i wish i couldnt feel the actual pulling on my soul.

such a firm grip on something that isnt even suppose to be tangible.

i beg of you, i beg this life to discontinue this nagging torture.

because i dont know what it is about you...

and i dont know how to put this all into words.
all i do know is sometimes it feels like were both letting go. the free fall away from what seems to be the only thing ive ever really known helps some of my guts rip away and fall out of my bloodymouth.

the pain stops for a moment right then.

it is then that it grows so great in horriable what now stabbing aching confussion that all is numb.

a subconscious lidociane for my guts and your brain.

you know what i want, im sorry im to busy chewing on my pain deeming myself unable to spit out any thing worth listening to.

i am well aware of the fact that
i ramble on with no real path.

just do me a favor and realize how much feeling i pour out into words that most dont understand.

i will not appoligize for such, i am a unique girl with too much running through the pea in my skull.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!

no more now, ginas sore now.