I feel awful
I've got a flu type of thingy which I had hoped would be gone by now, but it isn't. Still a headache, still ear troubles. Pain in my throat is gone, thank God. At work they told me, basically, that I have been ill too often and it may not happen again, or... (I've been ill three times, each time for a week, since September. I understand where they're coming from, but hey, I can't really help it, can I?) So I have to go to work tomorrow night, and I really don't feel up to it. We considering that I quit work altogether, but if I don't get grants anymore, that would mean we'd be 7000 euros short at the end of the 3 years and that's a scary idea. On the other hand, even if I just get one small grant of 10000, that problem is obviously solved. Problem is, we don't know what the chances are. However, not working would definitely lessen the stress and we could probably spend a little less money as well. Though I am absolutely unwilling to give up our summer holiday in Finland and/or the conference in Bonn... I feel I don't have the right to stop working, because it would make both our lives harder, but on the other hand, if I don't, my PhD might take longer and that would cost more. And Petra says my health comes first. And Daphne said I could always find something else when I feel better. They're all right. But it's still a big decision for me... And with this clogged up head, I can hardly think...