Oh God...lovely
Stalking is illegal. masterfedora confronts kristenjarrod.
kristenjarrod is stalking masterfedorakristenjarrod's REAL name :Geri Cookekristenjarrod's REAL DOB :22nd August 1981Height :161 cmWeight : 64.8 kgkristenjarrod has dreamt about you : 20 times kristenjarrod became interested in you : 15th January 2007kristenjarrod's latest dream about you kristenjarrod and masterfedora are the first astronauts to colonize Mars. Instead of concentrating on colonial issues, the two young lovebirds instead spend their hours making passionate love on top of Olympus Mons.This is how kristenjarrod describes your relationship behind your back 'Things couldn't be any worse at the moment, not only has masterfedora's father threatened to kill me if I go anywhere near their house but I've also just received a restrainer order from the police which prevents me from going within 1500m of her.'kristenjarrod's been stealing stuff from your house too. kristenjarrod has a number of masterfedora's old school books littered around their bedroom.They've even started modifying their body for you kristenjarrod had the lower part of their legs removed in order to compensate for the difference in height between the two of you. Needless to say, you were suitably unimpressed when kristenjarrod came to see you next.They sent the following message to you in a Valentines I think I've just creamed myself thinking about you. There's no tissue paper in the house to clear up the mess so I've used this card instead.
The Police No. calls to the police : 25 timesYour Last Call to The Police "I've had enough of this. You know kristenjarrod, that crazed internet stalker you've been after for the last 6 months, well they've been stalking me too. They were just over at my house there not so long ago and threatened to come back and burn down my house."kristenjarrod's Police File kristenjarrod would be a nothing more than a loveable rogue if it were not for their love of samurai swords.
Testimonies about kristenjarrod
metallicabyss - A withered old hag
'kristenjarrod was always one of us. One of the gang. We never suspected anything. I'm really shocked..'
sugahlei - Dull O Dull
'Surprise Surprise, kristenjarrod's a dirty fucker? Tell me something different.'
peterspengies - Overweight cult comedian
'How depressing. I feel sorry for masterfedora, it's kind as fuck to a fault. Always willing to give people the benefit of the doubt. All of this sickens me.''
This is hilarious. Is it bad I rather like the dream about me? Hey if it involves me on Mars I'm probably for it.