Ya'll Have Some Homework
First of all, it's ya'll, not y'all. I've been saying it for 30 or so years. Here's how it works:
"Ya" is short or slang for "you." So "ya" is the complete word substituted for "you." The apostrophe takes the place of a letter or sound in a contraction. The "a" in "all." So it's "ya'll." It's also the way it's pronounced. "Ya" and "ll." If you don't agree with me then go fuck yourself. Okay, that's a bit harsh. You don't have to actually do that. Unless you want to, and. more importantly, can. Then, by all means, go right ahead. More power to ya'll. End of discussion on that topic.
Now, for your homework:
Here's the thing. As some of you know I have cut Jared from my life. I'll get to the reason in a moment. Now, his birthday is next Saturday, the 23rd of February. He'll be 23 or 24. I'm not sure which. Anyway, here's my question; Do I send him a simple message that just says, "I hope you have a Happy Birthday!" Nothing more. Nothing less. Just that. Here's the dilemma... The reason I cut him from my life is because I thought I was doing him more harm than good. See, I was the person he came to with his problems and issues. I fielded many a call where he's crying and wanted someone to calm him down. I've been here through an endless parade of boyfriends (and just random people he's fucked), so that he can bitch, complain, and, generally, tear these people down for the most base of reasons. All the while he's known that I love him and want to be with him. I was once, for a weekend, and then it went to hell.
So does he not register that it hurts when he talks about all the guys he's going out with (or fucking) to me? I mean, really? Isn't that common sense. So they're are the two reasons that I've stopped talking to Jared.
Now, I don't with him ill. I truly don't. What good would it do to want someone to suffer. It doesn't improve my life in any way and then he'd be less happy and suffer more. Suffering is bad. So no wishing him ill. In fact, I wish him well. I hope that he grows. I believe that because I have been there for about 8-9 years that he's not been able to grow and mature emotionally and mentally because I've kept him from hitting rock bottom. I've always saved him. But part of me wonders, what if he latches onto this new guy he's been hanging out with and uses him the same way he used me. Now, I don't think anyone would be as patient as I have been and would have given up long ago on ever thinking they'd be with him on a permanent basis. So I think he'd probably wear this person out. Personally, I think he goes through men and friends like I do a pair of underwear. That is to say, a fresh set every night. Now, I can't help that part of him. He's going to have to grow out of that.
But do I say this minimal, "I hope you have a Happy Birthday!" or do I just pretend that it isn't happening and possibly make him feel as though I am a cold hearted bastard. Now, as for as a cold hearted bastard thing goes, if he thinks I'm one, then he thinks I'm one, and I couldn't care less. But is it actually bastard like behavior? Because I'd like to avoid that if at all possible. He's just got a lot of growing up to do and I can't keep picking up his messes. I've saved financially, several times, to the tune of $2700 USD (or there abouts). Do I ever expect to see the money back. I'd be nice but I'm not holding out hope that he'll actually stop spending money on things he doesn't really need in order to pay back his debts. That's one of the things he needs to do. Get so far into debt that he needs to file for bankruptcy. Sounds harsh, I know. If he can learn the lesson of money management before then, great. But that's what it'll have to come to in order for him to learn, unless, by some miracle, he gets the lesson before then. I'm not holding out hope.
So do I break the communications silence and wish him will on his birthday or do I let sleeping dogs lie? Because he tried to call me, once, after I stopped talking to him last Sunday (the 10th of February) and he didn't leave a voicemail, he has had ample time to message me online on IM through Steam (just trust that it's a program with an IM feature attached to it), he hasn't tried to call again, he hasn't written me an email. Nothing. I would have thought that if I were important to him that he would have fought harder for the friendship. I guess I found out it wasn't anything but a one-sided friendship this whole time. He's just used me.
Still, if he's been bad to me and I go ahead and be bad to him, then I'm worse than him because I know better than to do something so wrong, Karma-wise, as to seek revenge. So discuss. I want to hear points of view. You don't have to point out things in other's replies. Make an original reply and go with that. Should that be what ye wish. I am counting on you F-List (and others who read my blog for other content). I'm not saying I'll take any of your advice. I'd just like it so that I can say that I had all the angles covered.
Namaste.
"Ya" is short or slang for "you." So "ya" is the complete word substituted for "you." The apostrophe takes the place of a letter or sound in a contraction. The "a" in "all." So it's "ya'll." It's also the way it's pronounced. "Ya" and "ll." If you don't agree with me then go fuck yourself. Okay, that's a bit harsh. You don't have to actually do that. Unless you want to, and. more importantly, can. Then, by all means, go right ahead. More power to ya'll. End of discussion on that topic.
Now, for your homework:
Here's the thing. As some of you know I have cut Jared from my life. I'll get to the reason in a moment. Now, his birthday is next Saturday, the 23rd of February. He'll be 23 or 24. I'm not sure which. Anyway, here's my question; Do I send him a simple message that just says, "I hope you have a Happy Birthday!" Nothing more. Nothing less. Just that. Here's the dilemma... The reason I cut him from my life is because I thought I was doing him more harm than good. See, I was the person he came to with his problems and issues. I fielded many a call where he's crying and wanted someone to calm him down. I've been here through an endless parade of boyfriends (and just random people he's fucked), so that he can bitch, complain, and, generally, tear these people down for the most base of reasons. All the while he's known that I love him and want to be with him. I was once, for a weekend, and then it went to hell.
So does he not register that it hurts when he talks about all the guys he's going out with (or fucking) to me? I mean, really? Isn't that common sense. So they're are the two reasons that I've stopped talking to Jared.
Now, I don't with him ill. I truly don't. What good would it do to want someone to suffer. It doesn't improve my life in any way and then he'd be less happy and suffer more. Suffering is bad. So no wishing him ill. In fact, I wish him well. I hope that he grows. I believe that because I have been there for about 8-9 years that he's not been able to grow and mature emotionally and mentally because I've kept him from hitting rock bottom. I've always saved him. But part of me wonders, what if he latches onto this new guy he's been hanging out with and uses him the same way he used me. Now, I don't think anyone would be as patient as I have been and would have given up long ago on ever thinking they'd be with him on a permanent basis. So I think he'd probably wear this person out. Personally, I think he goes through men and friends like I do a pair of underwear. That is to say, a fresh set every night. Now, I can't help that part of him. He's going to have to grow out of that.
But do I say this minimal, "I hope you have a Happy Birthday!" or do I just pretend that it isn't happening and possibly make him feel as though I am a cold hearted bastard. Now, as for as a cold hearted bastard thing goes, if he thinks I'm one, then he thinks I'm one, and I couldn't care less. But is it actually bastard like behavior? Because I'd like to avoid that if at all possible. He's just got a lot of growing up to do and I can't keep picking up his messes. I've saved financially, several times, to the tune of $2700 USD (or there abouts). Do I ever expect to see the money back. I'd be nice but I'm not holding out hope that he'll actually stop spending money on things he doesn't really need in order to pay back his debts. That's one of the things he needs to do. Get so far into debt that he needs to file for bankruptcy. Sounds harsh, I know. If he can learn the lesson of money management before then, great. But that's what it'll have to come to in order for him to learn, unless, by some miracle, he gets the lesson before then. I'm not holding out hope.
So do I break the communications silence and wish him will on his birthday or do I let sleeping dogs lie? Because he tried to call me, once, after I stopped talking to him last Sunday (the 10th of February) and he didn't leave a voicemail, he has had ample time to message me online on IM through Steam (just trust that it's a program with an IM feature attached to it), he hasn't tried to call again, he hasn't written me an email. Nothing. I would have thought that if I were important to him that he would have fought harder for the friendship. I guess I found out it wasn't anything but a one-sided friendship this whole time. He's just used me.
Still, if he's been bad to me and I go ahead and be bad to him, then I'm worse than him because I know better than to do something so wrong, Karma-wise, as to seek revenge. So discuss. I want to hear points of view. You don't have to point out things in other's replies. Make an original reply and go with that. Should that be what ye wish. I am counting on you F-List (and others who read my blog for other content). I'm not saying I'll take any of your advice. I'd just like it so that I can say that I had all the angles covered.
Namaste.