So what if I use MySpace more?!?
Yeah, so I just took my 2nd Comp.Sci. exam and now I'm waitin' for the actual class to start...or better yet, waitin' for the rest of the class to finish their exams.
Have you ever felt as if everything you loved and cherished so much has been taken away from you? Not just at one time, but many times during your life? That's how I feel/felt recently... Lately, things just haven't been goin my way, and I have no idea why. I'm a religious person, but even lookin at my life that way is confusing. I feel like the opposite of Job. Instead of being humble and realizing that God is still watching over me and taking care of me, I've been seeing all these losses as...I dunno...punishments? Maybe signs that I'm not doing everything that I need to do. Or maybe I'm just being tested. If that's the case, then I'd fail by the end of the exam.
Since January, I went through two relationships. One which failed like crazy, and the other which went so well for three months and just...ended. It ended when I wasn't ready for it to end. To this day, I'm still hurting at what happened. I haven't told the story here, but I've told it to a few people and it is just too long to explain again, so I'm gonna skip that.
The end result was that my ex hurt me and that hurt was probably the worst hurting I've ever felt...but I still wanna be with her, and I dunno why. I wasn't ready for the relationship to be over, and I'm not ready to get over it and her. I still talk to her, and I try not to think about it. I just hate the fact that she doesn't feel the same about me. That she could say she loved me, but weeks later, not only lose feelings for me, but start talkin to another guy as well. I don't wanna say that the relationship was a mistake...but I wonder if getting with her was the right decision. I mean, if you could be with someone for three months and see her almost everyday and not get tired of her, it had to be great, right?
I fuckin hate life right about now. I have to find another job because my oh so mommy dearest won't fuckin let me bring my fuckin car to Corpus Fuckin Christi...excuse my French, but Fuck That Shit! If I have a car in my possession, why the fuck would I leave it behind while I'm in college? I could at least walk to the store when I lived at the apartments, but now I'm living on campus and there is no fuckin HEB anywhere close by. Absolutely no place to shop at. And after 5, everything closes on campus, so if I'm hungry and don't have anything to eat, I have to call Pizza Hut or Double Dave's Pizza. If I'm too lazy to talk on the phone, I'll order pizza hut online. Greatest invention ever.
Not having my car with me is ruining my life and my potential to be "out there", and is pretty much defeating the purpose of why I'm here in the first place. It's not that I will use the damn thing to go out every single night. Gas is too fuckin expensive to do that, and now that I'm getting terminated at Whataburger, and with the lack of job options on campus, I'm gonna go broke real soon. So gas wouldn't be an option anyway. It wouldn't be so bad if I had my ATM card with me...but once again, mommy dearest insisted on keeping it so I won't lose it and/or waste hard earned money. Well, whoopdie-fuckin-doo...I don't even have any money to waste now!
I know what you're thinkin..."And how old are you again?" I'm 19 fuckin' years old. I have no car, I have no job, I have no money. And I'm 150+ miles from the comfort of my family...not like I'm homesick or anything. I'd just like to have a car, job and money...
Please send money...or come visit me...I'd 'preciate it
Have you ever felt as if everything you loved and cherished so much has been taken away from you? Not just at one time, but many times during your life? That's how I feel/felt recently... Lately, things just haven't been goin my way, and I have no idea why. I'm a religious person, but even lookin at my life that way is confusing. I feel like the opposite of Job. Instead of being humble and realizing that God is still watching over me and taking care of me, I've been seeing all these losses as...I dunno...punishments? Maybe signs that I'm not doing everything that I need to do. Or maybe I'm just being tested. If that's the case, then I'd fail by the end of the exam.
Since January, I went through two relationships. One which failed like crazy, and the other which went so well for three months and just...ended. It ended when I wasn't ready for it to end. To this day, I'm still hurting at what happened. I haven't told the story here, but I've told it to a few people and it is just too long to explain again, so I'm gonna skip that.
The end result was that my ex hurt me and that hurt was probably the worst hurting I've ever felt...but I still wanna be with her, and I dunno why. I wasn't ready for the relationship to be over, and I'm not ready to get over it and her. I still talk to her, and I try not to think about it. I just hate the fact that she doesn't feel the same about me. That she could say she loved me, but weeks later, not only lose feelings for me, but start talkin to another guy as well. I don't wanna say that the relationship was a mistake...but I wonder if getting with her was the right decision. I mean, if you could be with someone for three months and see her almost everyday and not get tired of her, it had to be great, right?
I fuckin hate life right about now. I have to find another job because my oh so mommy dearest won't fuckin let me bring my fuckin car to Corpus Fuckin Christi...excuse my French, but Fuck That Shit! If I have a car in my possession, why the fuck would I leave it behind while I'm in college? I could at least walk to the store when I lived at the apartments, but now I'm living on campus and there is no fuckin HEB anywhere close by. Absolutely no place to shop at. And after 5, everything closes on campus, so if I'm hungry and don't have anything to eat, I have to call Pizza Hut or Double Dave's Pizza. If I'm too lazy to talk on the phone, I'll order pizza hut online. Greatest invention ever.
Not having my car with me is ruining my life and my potential to be "out there", and is pretty much defeating the purpose of why I'm here in the first place. It's not that I will use the damn thing to go out every single night. Gas is too fuckin expensive to do that, and now that I'm getting terminated at Whataburger, and with the lack of job options on campus, I'm gonna go broke real soon. So gas wouldn't be an option anyway. It wouldn't be so bad if I had my ATM card with me...but once again, mommy dearest insisted on keeping it so I won't lose it and/or waste hard earned money. Well, whoopdie-fuckin-doo...I don't even have any money to waste now!
I know what you're thinkin..."And how old are you again?" I'm 19 fuckin' years old. I have no car, I have no job, I have no money. And I'm 150+ miles from the comfort of my family...not like I'm homesick or anything. I'd just like to have a car, job and money...
Please send money...or come visit me...I'd 'preciate it