We were born to suffer,it's our lot in life.
I wish I wasn't so fucked in the head.I just recently started talking to my ex again.Not sure but after all this time I started to get my head straight and I wanted to be an adult and talk to her.I just fall back into the same routine where I get confused and wonder what I'm actually doing,because I still have feelings for her yet she's moved on.She doesn't understand why I get all upset but she moved on right away and I'm still alone left to dwell with the thoughts of what went wrong.We've been getting along really well but I start that whole confusion shit.I was also told that me writing in this journal is a waste of time,and that I need to talk to people about it.Well I only have a couple of true friends well actually one and I don't know how bringing up the same shit to him all the time is helping anything,because there's probably no real answers.Writing in this journal even if it is only once a month or year is one thing that helps me cope and not eat a fucking bullet.My ex has really grown up and she has nothing but good intentions with wanting to talk to me but my own fucked up brain keeps ripping these old scars open again.I always try to end my entries with Fuck it all and fucking no regrets,but that's me trying to be strong,if you have no regrets that means you're either a saint or a heartless fuck.Well I need to get my shit together and try to charge on,with the hopes that there's someone out there for me.I just thought of some lyrics that seem to be fitting.Now is the time for me to rise to my feet,wipe your spit from my face wipe these tears from my eyes.Cue the crushing guitars.