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[masskink]

MASS EFFECT KINK MEME
ANONYMOUSLY post a pairing and a kink. This meme is open to ALL pairings and ALL kinks. Slash, femslash, het and xenophilia are all welcome here. Fluffy kinks, violent kinks, gross kinks ...whatever you're into. However, there are a few guidelines

Comments

[anonymous]

This is being written on my iPhone, so sorry about any typos!!
*

Garrus stared miserably at his hands, reflecting the ambient light in Shepard's quarters. What a mistake this had all been.

Shepard was still in her bathroom - from the sound of her wretching things weren't going so well. He sneezed again, then once more, glad that at least that embarassment had subsided.

Why oh WHY had he listened to Jack, or thought the biotic did anything nice? You're in luck buddy, I got some edible body gel you can use. May make things a little hotter.

Turned out Shepard was allergic to it: the gel had reacted with his skin causing him to break out and caused Shepard to wretch uncontrollably.

Then there was the perfume Kelly had apparently given the Commander - Garrus had tried to hide his own reaction to it but had begun sneezing uncontrollably around the time Shepard had rushed to the bathroom.

Garrus buried his face in his talons. What an utter disaster.

He didn't notice that the wretching had stopped until he heard the bathroom door open; he came quickly to his feet as Shepard moved into the room. "You feeling alright?" he asked tentatively, afraid to even touch her.

Dammit. His nose was beginning to burn again.

"I'll survive," she whispered. She looked green still - Garrus doubted it was the light. "Im going to kill Kelly."

"Before or after I kill Jack?"

A small chuckle came from Shepard then she winced. Garrus fidgetted, unsure what to do. He wanted to help her but knew that if he got any closer to her he'd break out in a sneezing fit again.

"Well," Shepard said after a moment of silence, her voice somewhat stronger, "guess I should get in the shower and wash this shit off."

Garrus kept his disappointment to himself as Shepard disappeared back into the bathroom; he reached down and picked up his clothing and started to put it back on over the oily bits.

The door swished open and Shepard poked her head out at him. "Coming?"

[anonymous]

I adored this. Thank you for sharing!

[anonymous]

LMAO. I just about died reading this. It's almost exactly what happened to hubby n me on our honeymoon. Poor guy broke out all over down there, and then I got a bladder infection. Thank god we were staying in a place that had G4. Ninja Warrior marathons FTW! I love that you have captured their discomfort, and also their willingness to give it another try. First time together's never as easy as expected. LOL. Thanks for sharing.