Since they all tie in to each other, you should probably read them in order. Also, I’m actually attempting a plot. So, fingers crossed.
Almost Doesn’t Count
Part 1A Compared to most apartments on Omega, the one he was currently attempting to leave was fairly nice and spacious. Say what you will about Aria, but the Queen took care of her own. She was also one of the very few people Saren Arterius didn't care to cross. The matriarch was a formidable enemy to have and even more dangerous to lose: take down Aria and the power vacuum would swallow the whole station as endless criminals tried to fill her shoes. The Terminus may have been outside the Citadel's jurisdiction but all the same, a void like that was the last thing the Council wanted. Sometimes Saren wanted to say fuck the consequences and be done with it. But Council Spectres couldn’t behave like that.
“Leaving already?” Gavorn asked breathlessly from the bed as he rolled onto his back and stretched. “You don’t want to go another round?”
“I have somewhere to be.” Saren muttered and jerked his belt closed. He turned back to the bed and leaned down, holding himself up on a palm planted next to Gavorn’s head and pushed their mouths together. The other man returned the kiss hesitantly and Saren had to coax his mouth in order to slip his tongue in. A moment later, Gavorn pushed him away, staring at him strangely.
“What?” Saren asked.
“You’ve never kissed me before.” Was it his imagination, or did Gavorn sound embarrassed?
“I haven’t?”
“No, never.”
Saren straightened.
“It’s not that I mind it,” Gavorn told him quickly, wary of a dangerous change in mood. “It’s just that you’ve never done that and I only ever kiss the men I’m dating and not the ones I let fuck me. If you wanted to date me then yeah, I’d kiss you, but I’m sort of seeing someone so-“
“I don’t date.” Saren said absently, his mind whirring on implications. “We’ll talk some other time Gavorn, I need to go.”
+_-_-_-_-_+
It wasn’t the first time something like what had occurred with Gavorn had happened. Ever since he’d started sleeping with Nihlus months ago, Saren had begun to slip up in his other affairs. He’d taken Cicero gently in a bed rather than roughly on the floor or against a wall like was their usual. Then, a week later he’d allowed Kuril to shove him onto his knees before… Kissing Gavorn was just his latest slip up. Ever since Nihlus he’d begun to lose track of the differences between his lovers. Saren couldn’t keep straight who liked what, who wanted him gentle and who wanted to be dominated by him. All he could think about when he was with one of his lovers was what Nihlus liked and wanted from him. And what he wanted in return. All the things Nihlus gave him without asking for anything.
Saren couldn’t care less about material items, those things meant so little when compared to what Nihlus gave him every day. He had the younger man’s admiration, his loyalty, his body, but most importantly, Saren had his trust. Spirits his trust, the only thing that made him harder was the feeling of Nihlus’ body pressed along his own. Or having his head between his legs, but that usually happened once Saren was already hard.
He’d stopped meeting his other lovers at his ship too. Instead, when Saren felt the urge to fuck someone else (and that urge had diminished) he would rendezvous with them at their apartment, a cheap hotel or in a back room of a club designed for that exact purpose. He wasn’t trying to hide the others from Nihlus, there was no point in that when Saren had been clear about his appetites from the beginning.
“Sooner or later, you’ll get jealous.” He’d warned the younger man.
“I haven’t yet. I’m not asking you to be my boyfriend and I don’t care who else you fuck or how many there are, I just want to be one of them.”
Almost Doesn't Count 1B/?
anonymous
January 17 2014, 01:38:31 UTC
Part 1B
Ieryan, who had loved him years ago and perhaps still did, had expected exclusivity; a thing Saren had no concept of at the time or now. His... infidelity was one of the factors that had ended their relationship. But Nihlus understood. Saren certainly didn’t care that the younger man had a taste for asari. They'd had a conversation recently while they’d basked in the afterglow where he had informed Saren that he was the only male lover Nihlus ever wanted. Saren took just as much pleasure in that as he did the sex itself.
Although he’d just finished putting Gavorn through his paces, all he could think about was getting Nihlus naked and under him. Saren had always had a demanding sex drive but being with Nihlus often left him ravenous, like he could never get enough. And lately it was only his fellow Spectre who left him feeling fulfilled. Just thinking about him had Saren’s groin plates widening and pure need spreading over his plates and seeping under his skin.
Sex had always just been a means to an end, a way to get the tension out of his spine and flood his brain with feel-good chemicals that got him through another day. The need was a biological one understood throughout his species. Most turians had numerous partners before settling down with a spouse. He hadn't realized Ieryan had considered them mates until the man had confronted him about it. Ieryan had given him a dual ultimatum to stop sleeping around and to take the markings he would have worn were he not a biotic. The Councilor’s requests, both unreasonable and impossible, were only the front to his real reason. Saren wasn’t good enough to be his mate, not as a barefaced biotic and not as the Spectre he became later. And while he’d loved Ieryan, there were just some things he wasn’t willing to do.
After he’d walked away from the first real relationship of his life, sex still remained a means to an end like any other biological act that had to be completed. But just because it had to be done didn’t mean it wasn’t fun.Saren had had many exciting lovers, skilled in any number of pleasures but he’d never cared for anyone like he had Ieryan.
And then, Saren had recruited Nihlus for training, had watched him grow from an intelligent but awkward young man into a confident and dangerous Spectre. Then he’d slept with him and only a couple of times later Saren began feeling the things he hadn’t felt since Ieryan. He had always been fond of the younger man but this was different. A salarian could have looked at him for a split second and known he loved his protégé, and was probably in love with him too.
Almost Doesn't Count 1C/?
anonymous
January 17 2014, 01:40:34 UTC
Part 1C
Granted, Saren had no idea how to show him. If Nihlus were a female he intended to truly court to be his mate, he’d find reflective stones or a sweet smelling plate balm or something decorative for her crest to give as gifts. But the other Spectre wasn’t and Saren honestly couldn’t see him accepting a traditional mating present. Maybe…maybe he could buy Nihlus a better gun or polish his armor the next time he did his own. It would have to be enough, at least until he came up with something more appropriate.
It would just be easier to tell him and Saren had even tried a few times. Once while staring into those verdant eyes as they’d had sex and once he’d tried to slip the confession into a casual conversation. His tongue got stuck to the roof of his mouth every time and he’d been unable to speak. Nihlus never noticed, not once, and it just made it harder to get the words out the following times he’d tried.
Saren had managed to express his feelings in one way though, when that first night together he’d addressed Nihlus by one of the few pet-names he knew. Calling him Castanea had been an offhand choice; he’d never been one for terms of endearment, that had always been Ieryan’s thing. Of course, now Saren knew that he’d been subconsciously trying to tell Nihlus that he did actually care for him as more than just another one of his lovers from the very beginning. It was something he strived to prove every time he pushed Nihlus down or pinned him to the wall. Saren might never find a way to express just how special the younger man was to him but he’d certainly keep trying in the ways he knew how.
Almost Doesn't Count 2A/?
anonymous
January 17 2014, 19:31:15 UTC
Part 2A
Finally out of the stinking cesspool that was Omega proper, Saren headed down the docking corridor to his ship, knowing that this late in the night-cycle Nihlus would be sleeping. The other man was still under the influence of Citadel Standard Time and as such kept regular hours, something Saren had never done. He slept when he was tired or after he’d had a good fuck, either worked for him. Stepping through the airlock though, Saren knew what he preferred. He had recently convinced Nihlus to sleep nude to save him the time of removing his clothes whenever he felt like sharing the other man’s bed. Being with Gavorn had left him mostly unsatisfied and currently climbing into Nihlus’ bed, an event that was happening more and more frequently, was exactly what he wanted.
The younger turian was a heavy sleeper, a trait military life had never managed to divest him of. Saren didn’t even have to sneak into his room. The sound of the door sliding open (the holo-lock was always green now) went unheard by Nihlus who was stretched out on his stomach with his arms wrapped around the pillow that supported his head. Saren would only need to pull away the blanket to get at the russet skin and plates he loved so much. It was so different from his own. He had never met another pale turian besides his brother, and while Saren sometimes longed to be pressed against a body where he was unsure where his ended and his lover’s began because they were the same shade of bone-white, he’d never trade the excitement that came with watching his lighter form blend with and cover Nihlus’ much darker flesh.
Standing at the foot of the bed, halfway out of his shirt and with one hand tugging at his belt, Saren stopped as something dawned on him. I still smell like Gavorn. He realized and let his shirt fall off his shoulders to dangle from his elbows. It wouldn’t be the first time he’d crawled into a man’s bed while stinking of another. He’d never cared about it, before anyway, but the thought of doing that to Nihlus bothered him and made his stomach feel weird. He knew why and he knew what that weirdness was too, it was the same compulsion that had made him hide his affairs from Ieryan. Although he wasn’t hiding that aspect of his life from Nihlus, it didn’t mean he would rub the other man’s face in that fact, it was disrespectful considering all that he’d been trying to tell Nihlus. I need to shower before I touch him.
Saren bathed quickly, using an excess amount of soap to dispel Gavorn’s scent from his skin. He barely took the time to dry off before returning to Nihlus’ room to find that the younger man hadn’t stirred in the slightest. Saren made a low sound of satisfaction and knelt on the bed by his feet. Supporting his weight on his hands, he leaned forward until he could touch his mouth to the back of Nihlus’ neck and the thinner plates that descended from underneath his fringe. Still the younger man gave no reaction.
The lack of reaction was thrilling but Saren much preferred participation. He scraped his teeth along those thin plates, steadily adding pressure as he got closer to the skin. Beneath him, Nihlus started to wake up, his back arching as he stretched and his arms unwinding from the pillow. Saren slowly lowered the rest of his body until he had effectively immobilized his lover to the mattress and slid his hands under the sheet, eagerly searching for the warmth of Nihlus’ smooth and youthful plating.
“Mmm,” Nihlus hummed and lifted his hips until Saren could rub against him through the sheet, an opportunity he didn’t waste. He’d been hard since the moment he’d stepped into the room that first time.
Almost Doesn't Count 2B/?
anonymous
January 17 2014, 19:34:33 UTC
Part 2B
The younger man squirmed for a moment, making haphazard movements until Saren finally realized he was trying to wiggle out from under the sheet and helped him. He lifted up just enough to grab the offending fabric with one hand and jerk it off his former student, at last revealing the wonderfully naked body underneath. Saren felt his cock harden even further and he couldn’t wait to get inside the younger man.
“I don’t have it in me to be gentle tonight Castanea,” He warned in-between nips to that dark throat. “I want you too much.”
Nihlus moaned his name, tones clouded with both sleep and a slight bit of unease. He didn’t want to be hurt even though the following pleasure was always mind-blowing.
He gave in without being asked. Only because I love him.They hadn’t been together long enough and Nihlus still had so little experience when it came to the type of sex Saren liked for him to carelessly fuck him without preparing his body first.
“What do you want me to do?”
Nihlus twisted his torso around, the show of flexibility sped up Saren’s heart and made his mouth salivate with the sudden urge to kiss him. He’d forgotten just how much he enjoyed the taste of another’s tongue, kissing his lovers wasn’t something he did a lot of, not since Ieryan and his talent for it had waned over the years. But with Nihlus, it was just another thing he couldn’t get enough of, another thing he enjoyed as much as the sex.
“I want…” The younger man trailed off, for some reason Saren didn’t understand, he was still reluctant about asking him directly for what he wanted. It contradicted with the man he’d watched easily seduce women with a smile and a few words.
“Tell me Castanea,” He said, able to hear his own need in the subtones of his voice. “You can ask anything of me.”
Nihlus shifted under him, arching his back in such a way as to cause Saren’s dick to settle in the divide of his ass. He hissed at the heat of his lover’s flesh and the pressure of the younger man pushing back into his hips.
“I want you to take me,” The other Spectre told him, pushing back hard and rolling his hips so that Saren slid in the slickness of his arousal. “I want you to cum in me and then I want to put you on your back and touch you.”
His pulse had increased as Nihlus talked, blood racing through his veins to fill his cock and make him impossibly hard. The emphasis on that one word filled his mind with images of the times he had been on his back with the younger man stretched out between his legs, one hand on his thigh and the other….
Saren swallowed hard through a throat that was constricted and hot with lust. “Yes.” He said simply and ground himself against Nihlus. Thank the spirits for self-lubrication, I won’t hurt him as long as I start slowly.
“Then don’t make me wait Saren.” The younger man’s voice was muffled as he laid his head back on the pillow, one mandible tight to his jaw and the other, the one closest to Saren, opened in a challenging smirk.
He ground his cock against Nihlus’ ass again and rocked his hips forward then back, slipping a little in his own fluid. The younger man rose to meet him, his breath coming a little faster the harder that Saren rubbed between the divot of his rear. He maneuvered a hand under Nihlus’ middle and just lightly skimmed his talons down his side to the hard flare of his hipbone. Saren still needed his other hand to support himself so his ability to caress was limited but he kept up the slow rotations of his hips, thrusting along the divide of warm and supple flesh.
“Saren, please,” He moaned, pushing back to meet him while at the same time trying to stay in contact with the hand that was moving downward.
Saren could already feel the heat coming off Nihlus’ rapidly spreading groin plates. He trailed his fingers lower over that opening and then down under where the youth’s cock would emerge once he was hard. Cautiously, he slid a fingertip into Nihlus’ sheath, just enough to coat his finger with the slippery oils of his sex. The younger man moaned again, louder, because he knew Saren wanted a taste of him but didn’t want to stop what they were already doing.
Almost Doesn't Count 2C/?
anonymous
January 17 2014, 19:36:58 UTC
Part 2C
He pulled back as he felt the shifting of muscles that heralded Nihlus’ beginning erection and stuck that finger in his mouth to lick clean. Saren nearly told the youth that he loved his flavor but his mouth snapped closed at the last moment. It was too close to the confession he still hadn’t managed to talk himself into making. He settled for lowering his head and giving the back of Nihlus’ neck a playful nip which he then soothed with the tip of his tongue. Saren held back an affectionate hum. He had tried to be more vocal for Nihlus knowing how much the younger man enjoyed that but after years of muffling the more telling harmonics he found it difficult to learn how to express himself that way again.
“I thought,” Nihlus moaned as Saren shoved against his rear a little harder. “I thought you couldn’t be gentle.”
His mandibles fluttered in excitement. “Do you want me to be gentle?” He asked.
“No, no I don’t. I want you to fuck me Saren, just fuck me.”
Lust flared hot as an inferno and spread through his nerves, searing his senses. He was always so careful with Nihlus, always mindful of the other man’s pleasure and comfort rather than his own. Partly because he enjoyed it and partly because he knew Nihlus had expected to be treated as roughly as Saren treated his other lovers. He couldn’t be as brusque with him as he was with Cicero or someone else, they meant nothing to him. Nihlus meant more to Saren than anyone ever had, more than Ieryan and recently, more than Desolas had. Sometimes he was ashamed of that, his brother meant everything to him before he died but Saren understood the love he held and nurtured for Nihlus was an entirely different incarnation.
But if he wanted to know what being truly fucked felt like…
“Lift your hips for me.”
A!A: Two more parts of smut and then the beginning of an actual plot!....I’m only about two and half sections away from this one.
Almost Doesn't Count 3A/?
anonymous
January 18 2014, 18:49:53 UTC
Part 3A
Nihlus did as he was instructed immediately, eagerly. Saren grasped the base of his shaft and positioned himself while his free hand spread the younger man open. He took his time pushing past the tight ring of muscle, savoring the way Nihlus’ body resisted at first before giving in to the intrusion. He didn’t stop the forward motion of his hips until he felt his widened plates firmly meet the other man’s ass. Then Saren stilled and took a moment to enjoy being buried in his former student as deeply as he could possibly get. This was his favorite part, when he first entered Nihlus and internal muscles instinctually tried to push him back out, squeezing and rippling around his cock from the tip to the shaft to the base. He bit his tongue out of habit on the sound of pure ecstasy that was fighting its way out of his chest.
Saren didn’t stay that way long, he couldn’t with the way Nihlus was already panting and trembling beneath him. He liked that feeling too.
“Be still.” He said under his breath but still loud enough for Nihlus to hear.
He gave the younger man the barest amount of time to adjust to his size before he pulled back and slid completely out. Nihlus made a noise that sounded deceptively like a whimper and subconsciously lifted his rear in search of Saren. He put a hand in the middle of his’ back and pinned him to the bed then he slammed his cock home hard.
Nihlus yelped. “Fuck! A little warning next time.”
“You said-“
“I know what I said Saren.”
He took a slow, steadying breath. “Do you want me to stop?”
“Hell no. Come on Spectre, fuck me.”
Spirits he loved this man, wanted to tell him as much but again the words lodged in his throat and he couldn’t. He got to his knees between Nihlus’ legs and nudged them further apart until he had them spread as widely as they could go, feet all the way to the sides of the bed. Saren latched his mouth to the back of his lover’s neck. It was reminiscent of the way he’d scruff a turian female if he were taking her from behind and was often referred to as the ‘mating bite’ because it was usually done when she was trying to conceive. Saren just liked the power it gave him over Nihlus’ movements as he held him in place and began a brutal pace. He still managed not to be too rough but his thrusts were harder and faster than he’d ever used with Nihlus.
Saren threw himself toward orgasm, forcing that pressure to build and build with every stroke. He kept the younger man pinned and immobile, kept the hold of teeth at Nihlus’ nape, careful not to pierce the skin. He didn’t intend to last long, the need to fill his lover, to leave his mark inside the younger man as deeply as he could was too strong and nearly overwhelming.
“Saren,”
“Shhh.” He soothed through the mating bite and pet the long spines of Nihlus’ fringe gently even as he slammed his dick in and jerked it back out.
“Please,” Subharmonics all over the place with pleasure, the younger man strained against him, trying to pull his neck free of teeth and attempting to roll his hips.
Saren shoved down on his back and closed his teeth a little tighter before letting go completely, pausing in his fucking. “Be still Nihlus.”
He felt the other man nod and then relax into the mattress. He gave that long fringe another caress and then began to piston into Nihlus with everything he had. In minutes the hot pressure that had been building along his spine and in his groin rushed over him like a wave. Saren grasped both of Nihlus’ hips and jerked the younger man closer, sending his cock deep as he came, filling him with spurt after spurt of hot cum. By the time he was empty, the dark plated turian was shaking in his palms and making small mewling sounds of need, still unsatisfied in that key way.
Almost Doesn't Count 3B/?
anonymous
January 18 2014, 18:56:29 UTC
Part 3B
Rather than collapse across his lover’s back with his dick still inside, Saren withdrew and flipped Nihlus over so they were facing each other. The pupils of his eyes had overtaken the startling green of the irises, something Saren was sure his own eyes matched. He held that stare for a handful of heartbeats before he shoved their mouths together.
Nihlus wrapped around him with a lustful groan. Pressed front to front, Saren could actually feel the blood surging to Nihlus’ thick erection now that it wasn’t trapped against the bed. He broke their kiss for just a moment.
“Was that what you wanted Castanea?” He asked and licked one mandible with a long swipe of his tongue.
“Part of it.” Nihlus told him breathlessly.
He’d expected it, but suddenly finding himself on his back was still a rush. Nihlus loomed over him with his shoulders hunched like he was waiting for Saren to change his mind and make him stop. When he didn’t, the younger man flashed him a playful grin before ducking his head and going straight for his throat. Saren felt his heart begin to race again and it was only partly due to the way Nihlus’ mouth mapped the contours of his throat and upper chest. The other part was a feeling he’d never been able to shake off, not even when he was with Ieryan. The nervousness he knew tied into his need for complete and utter control of all the aspects of his life, but the fear…The fear confused him. It was not that he had been abused in that manner. The only man to ever top him was the Councilor and he had willingly accepted that: a man of his position simply wasn't fucked by a low-tiered biotic more than twenty years his junior, it just wasn't done. So when Ieryan had lifted his chin to kiss him, Saren gave the unprotected line of his throat without complaint. It was only later as he rested alongside the older man that he realized he’d enjoyed giving himself to another person like that.
But Saren considered Nihlus his equal, that he loved the younger man helped too, and he knew he shouldn’t be so panicky about being underneath him with every intention of letting himself be taken. Saren had taught him how and where to touch him inside shortly after they’d begun sleeping together. Nihlus was always cautious with him and while he took advantage from time to time but he never rushed Saren. In fact, Nihlus was probably one of the most patient bedmates he’d ever had. He hadn’t let the younger man take him fully yet, he wanted to, really he did, but…
They’d gotten close once. Saren had been below him with a thigh hitched over Nihlus’ hip and breathless as the younger man’s cock had started to push into him. Then he’d panicked, his heart racing and his chest unbearably tight with nervous tension. Saren had stopped his lover at the last possible moment, a hand at the base of his dark throat holding him at bay.
“I can’t.” He had whispered and known that Nihlus could hear the severe anxiety in his harmonics. “I can’t.”
Nihlus had been surprisingly understanding and there hadn’t been any disappointment or irritation in his voice when he’d replied. “It’s okay. We don’t need to.”
Saren had never been more grateful to anyone in his life and he’d flipped them over and showed the younger man just how appreciative he was. But in his head, he was greatly confused and frustrated. He’d had no problem letting Ieryan fuck him like that, he’d often delighted in it. But the moment Nihlus rose over him, Saren became anxious and undone, even apprehensive and he panicked. Nihlus didn’t push the issue with him. He stopped whenever Saren needed him to and kept going when he asked.
Almost Doesn't Count 3C/?
anonymous
January 18 2014, 18:58:55 UTC
Part 3C
“Saren?”
He shook his head to clear it, a little embarrassed that he’d fallen so easy into memories and mental exposition while Nihlus had been making a trail down his chest with his mouth. “Yes?”
“I feel a bit underappreciated when I’ve got my tongue less than a foot away from your dick and you’re not even paying attention to me.” Mandibles flickered outward to show that he was joking. “I guess I could go find something else to do…”
Saren wrapped his arm around Nihlus’ back and pulled him in close. “What could possibly be more fun than being here with me?”
He shrugged. “There’s gotta be something out there.”
“I sincerely doubt it.”
The younger man huffed and kissed him, sliding his hand up the back of Saren’s head while carefully avoiding the port of his bio-amp. Nihlus had learned his lesson the first time he had hastily grasped at him and hit the little metal nodule a bit too hard. It had hurt significantly and Saren hadn’t been pleased, he had put an end to their activities, leaving them both emotionally strained and horny as hell. Though, the make-up sex had been amazing.
Speaking of amazing, that almost summed up Nihlus’ ability to kiss him senseless. It wasn’t something Saren typically enjoyed, kissing was something mates and companions- people in actual relationships- did and not casual lovers. There were only a few people besides Nihlus and Ieryan that he had included kissing as a part of their seduction. He was clumsy at the act as a result, never bothering to refine his skills. The Councilor hadn’t cared, likely under the impression that Saren’s lack of finesse was because he was so worked up as to lose some of his personal control. The younger Spectre though had figured it out right away, that no one had taught him how to kiss, so Nihlus had. Saren was glad for the lessons, connecting his mouth to the other man’s was exciting and it added a surprising amount of intimacy to their encounters that he didn’t have with his other lovers. It was just another reason to love him.
Saren broke the kiss to moan as he felt Nihlus’ hands moving over his sides toward his hips. Those green eyes held his as one hand slid further down and gently caressed the oversensitive flesh of his still opened plates. Saren shivered despite how warm Nihlus’ palm was, the skin of his fingers was rough and callused.
“Ok?” The younger man asked quietly.
He nodded and, trying to calm the frantic beat of his heart, spread his knees wide enough for Nihlus to move up between them. The other Spectre took the hint, leaning back down to nip and bite along the side of his neck while the hand not cupping his already half hard cock tracked over his thigh. He couldn’t keep his muscles from quivering at the touch. Nihlus noticed and kissed the spot were mandible hinged to his jaw tenderly, humming into his ear. Saren forced himself to relax. The younger man kissed him again, pushed his tongue inside and he was abruptly lost to the press of Nihlus’ body, the weight and heat of him. Saren kissed him back hard and didn’t stop the hand that slid down his back to grope his ass, he even rocked back into it. He pushed that creeping bit of nervousness away, he wanted the other Spectre badly and was willing to let go of that particular control to have him.
Nihlus kept at his mouth, slid their tongues together and let his mandibles flutter freely in obvious delight. The hand on his rear shifted just a bit and Saren felt slender fingertips nudge between the cheeks and over flesh that had only been touched by one other person. He grabbed the back of Nihlus’ head and kissed him even harder, moaning into his mouth as he fought down another brief flare of dread. And the voice in his head that said he was in too vulnerable a position; he’d been able to ignore it for Ieryan, he could do the same for Nihlus.
The younger man pulled back to stare at him. He wouldn’t continue unless Saren told him to.
“Touch me.” He said simply, rolling his hips to emphasize what he meant. Saren wasn’t shy by any means but his self-control was already beginning to slip.
Almost Doesn't Count 4A/?
anonymous
January 19 2014, 17:36:59 UTC
Part 4A
Another kiss and then Nihlus was easing that finger inside him, slowly and carefully like Saren had taught him to, he’d never been able to stop his muscles from tensing at first. The younger man pecked his mouth lightly with his own and pushed that finger in farther. Saren found that he couldn’t control his breathing or the tremor in his hands as he dug them into the sheets. Bit by bit he began to relax and enjoy Nihlus’ touch and in short order his hips rocked to match the in-out motion of the digit inside him. Then the younger man brushed his prostate and Saren melted into the bed with a soft moan.
Nihlus chuckled warmly, pecked his mouth again. “Feel good?” He asked although he knew exactly how good it felt.
Saren closed his eyes against the spike of pleasure that went straight to his cock when the younger man stroked that spot again and then again harder. He gave himself over to the sensations of heat pooling low while lightning zipped along his nerves and then the younger man distracted him with more kissing. He’d taught Nihlus well it seemed and soon Saren encouraged him to up the ante. The single finger inside him was suddenly two stretching him open. His heart slammed against his ribcage and the heat he’d felt beneath his skin began to cool but Nihlus didn’t give him time to feel uncomfortable. He wrapped his free hand around Saren’s dick and pumped him in time with the thrusts of his fingers, easily triggering that warmth to rebuild in a hurry.
He groaned into the younger man’s mouth and lifted his hips into the contact as Nihlus stroked the sensitive place inside him in tight circles. He abused that spot until Saren was burning with the need to have the other man inside him, not his fingers but his cock. His own pulsed in Nihlus’ grip with every tight caress and he rocked his hips to chase that friction. It seemed to go on forever. By the time Nihlus took his hands away, Saren was shaking with the effort to stay still and not pounce on him. He’d had his fun earlier and now…He liked feeling the other man’s erection resting heavily against his inner thigh and how he was slick with need. He wanted Nihlus above him.
Nihlus kissed along his mandibles and jaw as he made his way down to Saren’s neck, leaving little bites in his wake. When he reached the rapidly thumping pulse he traced patterns on the skin and then bit down. Saren sucked in a breath as he bucked against his former student, caused their cocks to brush and Nihlus to growl into his skin before increasing the pressure from his teeth. Strong hands and slender fingers gripped the back of his thighs and then his lover was pressed firmly to his ass. The head of Nihlus’ dick, thick and overheated, rubbed against Saren’s loosened entrance.
Something like panic bloomed in his chest and burst outward, dousing him in cold fear and he jerked back from Nihlus, putting some distance between their hips. The younger man looked at him in wide-eyed surprise before understanding changed his features and his mandibles pulled tight to his jaw. In moving away Saren had managed to overcome the worst of the panic but the little sliver of irrational fear remained. He took a steadying breath and lifted a hand to pet Nihlus’ fringe and to maybe pull him back down but the other man leaned his head away so that he couldn’t. He thought he saw a glimmer of hurt rejection in those eyes before they glanced away.
Saren let his hand fall. He’d be astonished if Nihlus wasn’t outright angry with him now. How many times is that now? He wondered forlornly. I can’t keep letting him get as far as I do and then making him stop time after time. I would have walked away from a lover that did this to me but Nihlus just keeps trying. Nihlus didn’t meet his eyes again, staring at a spot on the floor with his mandibles hitched up against his jaw. He was still but for the rise and fall of his chest, the slow in-out of his breath clearly a forced expression of calm. Even in the obvious frustration of being denied release, Saren thought he was painfully beautiful.
Almost Doesn't Count 4B/?
anonymous
January 19 2014, 17:39:45 UTC
Part 4B
He was suddenly aware of his heartbeat echoing in his head and a different kind of cold spreading from his chest outward. < i>I need to tell him I love him, that I can’t stop myself from panicking, that if we just keep trying eventually I’ll be able to. And I need to tell him now before I've fucked this up and he never wants me to touch him again, before it's too late.
“Nihlus I-“ His throat closed over the words. Tell him damn it. “I’m sorry I-“
The younger man leaned over him and touched their foreplates together with gentle pressure. “You don’t need to explain yourself,” He said, stilling leaning on him. “It means a lot that you’re willing to try and I’m glad you feel you can trust me enough to do so.”
Saren wrapped his hand around the back of Nihlus’ neck to hold that contact. Tell him. Now. “I…” Damn it. “I trust you more than most.”
“I’m glad.” The younger man said simply and slipped out of his hold to stand beside the bed. “I’m…going to shower and work this out myself.”
He’s shutting me out. Saren thought, only recognizing the behavior because it was something he did too. “No.” He said perhaps a little too quickly and with too much force, grabbing Nihlus’ hand. He wasn’t about to let a wall of things left unspoken and unaddressed come up between them like it had with Ieryan. Saren was not going to lose Nihlus because of his stupid fear. “Let me help you.”
One mandible flicked outward and the young man looked at him warily before replying in flat tones. “You don’t have to Saren.”
“I want to.” And he did, he couldn’t let Nihlus remain unsatisfied, not with the way the younger man’s cock jutted eagerly outward and was so slick with desire that Saren was sure he was dripping. It made his mouth water and his body tightened in a pleasant way. Next time I swear I won’t stop him.
Saren tugged his arm until Nihlus sat down and then he climbed off the bed to kneel between his feet. If he couldn’t tell the younger man how he felt without his mouth spontaneously sealing shut, he’d show him instead. The younger man looked down at him and his mouth parted as he breathed in short bursts. He knew exactly what Saren was going to do to him and he was anxious for it to begin. He didn’t have to wait more than a few heartbeats.
Almost Doesn't Count 4C/?
anonymous
January 19 2014, 17:41:54 UTC
Part 4C
He gave Nihlus a slow lick from opened plating all the way to the tip of his cock, keeping eye contact the entire time. The younger man made a pleased noise and ran the back of one hand over Saren’s left mandible gently. He made his own pleased sound at the touch; Ieryan would have- Stop comparing them. Just stop, focus on Nihlus, forget Ieryan.
Saren took his own advice and pushed his affair with the Councilor far from his mind. While he treated Nihlus to his tongue, he caressed the man’s legs with his fingertips, lingering on the super thin skin behind both his calf spurs and knees. Saren still held his former student’s stare, aware of the rapid increase in his breathing and the tremor that had begun moving through his muscles. He decided he’d teased Nihlus enough and took his cock fully into his mouth, eyes closing as he concentrated on keeping his teeth in check. Above Saren the younger man let out a ragged, dual-toned groan and cupped the back of his head under his fringe to guide his motions.
He took his time working Nihlus into a frenzy, backing off slowly when he thought the younger man was too close to release and then doubling his efforts to return him to that state. In all honesty, Saren was having fun turning his lover into a mess of incoherent words and curses. He was attentive to Nihlus’ every moan and shudder of pleasure and he reveled in being the only man to ever have the youth at his mercy like that. Saren brought him to his edge several times before finally letting him go over it, allowing the younger man to spill down his throat and staying there until the spasms stopped completely. When it was done and he’d licked Nihlus clean, he watched the younger man settle on his back with a satisfied little smirk.
Saren smiled back at him. “Mind if I sleep in here?” He chanced asking. Sharing a bed wasn’t something he’d done a lot of over the years but he’d already made more than a few exceptions for Nihlus….And he wasn’t ready to leave.
The first is here: http://masseffectkink.livejournal.com/7674.html?thread=36963578&#t36963578
And the second is here: http://masseffectkink.livejournal.com/7674.html?thread=37637626#t37637626
Since they all tie in to each other, you should probably read them in order. Also, I’m actually attempting a plot. So, fingers crossed.
Almost Doesn’t Count
Part 1A
Compared to most apartments on Omega, the one he was currently attempting to leave was fairly nice and spacious. Say what you will about Aria, but the Queen took care of her own. She was also one of the very few people Saren Arterius didn't care to cross. The matriarch was a formidable enemy to have and even more dangerous to lose: take down Aria and the power vacuum would swallow the whole station as endless criminals tried to fill her shoes. The Terminus may have been outside the Citadel's jurisdiction but all the same, a void like that was the last thing the Council wanted. Sometimes Saren wanted to say fuck the consequences and be done with it. But Council Spectres couldn’t behave like that.
“Leaving already?” Gavorn asked breathlessly from the bed as he rolled onto his back and stretched. “You don’t want to go another round?”
“I have somewhere to be.” Saren muttered and jerked his belt closed. He turned back to the bed and leaned down, holding himself up on a palm planted next to Gavorn’s head and pushed their mouths together. The other man returned the kiss hesitantly and Saren had to coax his mouth in order to slip his tongue in. A moment later, Gavorn pushed him away, staring at him strangely.
“What?” Saren asked.
“You’ve never kissed me before.” Was it his imagination, or did Gavorn sound embarrassed?
“I haven’t?”
“No, never.”
Saren straightened.
“It’s not that I mind it,” Gavorn told him quickly, wary of a dangerous change in mood. “It’s just that you’ve never done that and I only ever kiss the men I’m dating and not the ones I let fuck me. If you wanted to date me then yeah, I’d kiss you, but I’m sort of seeing someone so-“
“I don’t date.” Saren said absently, his mind whirring on implications. “We’ll talk some other time Gavorn, I need to go.”
+_-_-_-_-_+
It wasn’t the first time something like what had occurred with Gavorn had happened. Ever since he’d started sleeping with Nihlus months ago, Saren had begun to slip up in his other affairs. He’d taken Cicero gently in a bed rather than roughly on the floor or against a wall like was their usual. Then, a week later he’d allowed Kuril to shove him onto his knees before… Kissing Gavorn was just his latest slip up. Ever since Nihlus he’d begun to lose track of the differences between his lovers. Saren couldn’t keep straight who liked what, who wanted him gentle and who wanted to be dominated by him. All he could think about when he was with one of his lovers was what Nihlus liked and wanted from him. And what he wanted in return. All the things Nihlus gave him without asking for anything.
Saren couldn’t care less about material items, those things meant so little when compared to what Nihlus gave him every day. He had the younger man’s admiration, his loyalty, his body, but most importantly, Saren had his trust. Spirits his trust, the only thing that made him harder was the feeling of Nihlus’ body pressed along his own. Or having his head between his legs, but that usually happened once Saren was already hard.
He’d stopped meeting his other lovers at his ship too. Instead, when Saren felt the urge to fuck someone else (and that urge had diminished) he would rendezvous with them at their apartment, a cheap hotel or in a back room of a club designed for that exact purpose. He wasn’t trying to hide the others from Nihlus, there was no point in that when Saren had been clear about his appetites from the beginning.
“Sooner or later, you’ll get jealous.” He’d warned the younger man.
“I haven’t yet. I’m not asking you to be my boyfriend and I don’t care who else you fuck or how many there are, I just want to be one of them.”
It had been an unexpected reply.
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Ieryan, who had loved him years ago and perhaps still did, had expected exclusivity; a thing Saren had no concept of at the time or now. His... infidelity was one of the factors that had ended their relationship. But Nihlus understood. Saren certainly didn’t care that the younger man had a taste for asari. They'd had a conversation recently while they’d basked in the afterglow where he had informed Saren that he was the only male lover Nihlus ever wanted. Saren took just as much pleasure in that as he did the sex itself.
Although he’d just finished putting Gavorn through his paces, all he could think about was getting Nihlus naked and under him. Saren had always had a demanding sex drive but being with Nihlus often left him ravenous, like he could never get enough. And lately it was only his fellow Spectre who left him feeling fulfilled. Just thinking about him had Saren’s groin plates widening and pure need spreading over his plates and seeping under his skin.
Sex had always just been a means to an end, a way to get the tension out of his spine and flood his brain with feel-good chemicals that got him through another day. The need was a biological one understood throughout his species. Most turians had numerous partners before settling down with a spouse. He hadn't realized Ieryan had considered them mates until the man had confronted him about it. Ieryan had given him a dual ultimatum to stop sleeping around and to take the markings he would have worn were he not a biotic. The Councilor’s requests, both unreasonable and impossible, were only the front to his real reason. Saren wasn’t good enough to be his mate, not as a barefaced biotic and not as the Spectre he became later. And while he’d loved Ieryan, there were just some things he wasn’t willing to do.
After he’d walked away from the first real relationship of his life, sex still remained a means to an end like any other biological act that had to be completed. But just because it had to be done didn’t mean it wasn’t fun.Saren had had many exciting lovers, skilled in any number of pleasures but he’d never cared for anyone like he had Ieryan.
And then, Saren had recruited Nihlus for training, had watched him grow from an intelligent but awkward young man into a confident and dangerous Spectre. Then he’d slept with him and only a couple of times later Saren began feeling the things he hadn’t felt since Ieryan. He had always been fond of the younger man but this was different. A salarian could have looked at him for a split second and known he loved his protégé, and was probably in love with him too.
Nihlus however…he hadn’t seemed to notice.
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Granted, Saren had no idea how to show him. If Nihlus were a female he intended to truly court to be his mate, he’d find reflective stones or a sweet smelling plate balm or something decorative for her crest to give as gifts. But the other Spectre wasn’t and Saren honestly couldn’t see him accepting a traditional mating present. Maybe…maybe he could buy Nihlus a better gun or polish his armor the next time he did his own. It would have to be enough, at least until he came up with something more appropriate.
It would just be easier to tell him and Saren had even tried a few times. Once while staring into those verdant eyes as they’d had sex and once he’d tried to slip the confession into a casual conversation. His tongue got stuck to the roof of his mouth every time and he’d been unable to speak. Nihlus never noticed, not once, and it just made it harder to get the words out the following times he’d tried.
Saren had managed to express his feelings in one way though, when that first night together he’d addressed Nihlus by one of the few pet-names he knew. Calling him Castanea had been an offhand choice; he’d never been one for terms of endearment, that had always been Ieryan’s thing. Of course, now Saren knew that he’d been subconsciously trying to tell Nihlus that he did actually care for him as more than just another one of his lovers from the very beginning. It was something he strived to prove every time he pushed Nihlus down or pinned him to the wall. Saren might never find a way to express just how special the younger man was to him but he’d certainly keep trying in the ways he knew how.
Updates are going to be random.
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Finally out of the stinking cesspool that was Omega proper, Saren headed down the docking corridor to his ship, knowing that this late in the night-cycle Nihlus would be sleeping. The other man was still under the influence of Citadel Standard Time and as such kept regular hours, something Saren had never done. He slept when he was tired or after he’d had a good fuck, either worked for him.
Stepping through the airlock though, Saren knew what he preferred. He had recently convinced Nihlus to sleep nude to save him the time of removing his clothes whenever he felt like sharing the other man’s bed. Being with Gavorn had left him mostly unsatisfied and currently climbing into Nihlus’ bed, an event that was happening more and more frequently, was exactly what he wanted.
The younger turian was a heavy sleeper, a trait military life had never managed to divest him of. Saren didn’t even have to sneak into his room. The sound of the door sliding open (the holo-lock was always green now) went unheard by Nihlus who was stretched out on his stomach with his arms wrapped around the pillow that supported his head. Saren would only need to pull away the blanket to get at the russet skin and plates he loved so much. It was so different from his own. He had never met another pale turian besides his brother, and while Saren sometimes longed to be pressed against a body where he was unsure where his ended and his lover’s began because they were the same shade of bone-white, he’d never trade the excitement that came with watching his lighter form blend with and cover Nihlus’ much darker flesh.
Standing at the foot of the bed, halfway out of his shirt and with one hand tugging at his belt, Saren stopped as something dawned on him. I still smell like Gavorn. He realized and let his shirt fall off his shoulders to dangle from his elbows. It wouldn’t be the first time he’d crawled into a man’s bed while stinking of another. He’d never cared about it, before anyway, but the thought of doing that to Nihlus bothered him and made his stomach feel weird. He knew why and he knew what that weirdness was too, it was the same compulsion that had made him hide his affairs from Ieryan. Although he wasn’t hiding that aspect of his life from Nihlus, it didn’t mean he would rub the other man’s face in that fact, it was disrespectful considering all that he’d been trying to tell Nihlus. I need to shower before I touch him.
Saren bathed quickly, using an excess amount of soap to dispel Gavorn’s scent from his skin. He barely took the time to dry off before returning to Nihlus’ room to find that the younger man hadn’t stirred in the slightest. Saren made a low sound of satisfaction and knelt on the bed by his feet. Supporting his weight on his hands, he leaned forward until he could touch his mouth to the back of Nihlus’ neck and the thinner plates that descended from underneath his fringe. Still the younger man gave no reaction.
The lack of reaction was thrilling but Saren much preferred participation. He scraped his teeth along those thin plates, steadily adding pressure as he got closer to the skin. Beneath him, Nihlus started to wake up, his back arching as he stretched and his arms unwinding from the pillow. Saren slowly lowered the rest of his body until he had effectively immobilized his lover to the mattress and slid his hands under the sheet, eagerly searching for the warmth of Nihlus’ smooth and youthful plating.
“Mmm,” Nihlus hummed and lifted his hips until Saren could rub against him through the sheet, an opportunity he didn’t waste. He’d been hard since the moment he’d stepped into the room that first time.
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Part 2B
The younger man squirmed for a moment, making haphazard movements until Saren finally realized he was trying to wiggle out from under the sheet and helped him. He lifted up just enough to grab the offending fabric with one hand and jerk it off his former student, at last revealing the wonderfully naked body underneath. Saren felt his cock harden even further and he couldn’t wait to get inside the younger man.
“I don’t have it in me to be gentle tonight Castanea,” He warned in-between nips to that dark throat. “I want you too much.”
Nihlus moaned his name, tones clouded with both sleep and a slight bit of unease. He didn’t want to be hurt even though the following pleasure was always mind-blowing.
He gave in without being asked. Only because I love him.They hadn’t been together long enough and Nihlus still had so little experience when it came to the type of sex Saren liked for him to carelessly fuck him without preparing his body first.
“What do you want me to do?”
Nihlus twisted his torso around, the show of flexibility sped up Saren’s heart and made his mouth salivate with the sudden urge to kiss him. He’d forgotten just how much he enjoyed the taste of another’s tongue, kissing his lovers wasn’t something he did a lot of, not since Ieryan and his talent for it had waned over the years. But with Nihlus, it was just another thing he couldn’t get enough of, another thing he enjoyed as much as the sex.
“I want…” The younger man trailed off, for some reason Saren didn’t understand, he was still reluctant about asking him directly for what he wanted. It contradicted with the man he’d watched easily seduce women with a smile and a few words.
“Tell me Castanea,” He said, able to hear his own need in the subtones of his voice. “You can ask anything of me.”
Nihlus shifted under him, arching his back in such a way as to cause Saren’s dick to settle in the divide of his ass. He hissed at the heat of his lover’s flesh and the pressure of the younger man pushing back into his hips.
“I want you to take me,” The other Spectre told him, pushing back hard and rolling his hips so that Saren slid in the slickness of his arousal. “I want you to cum in me and then I want to put you on your back and touch you.”
His pulse had increased as Nihlus talked, blood racing through his veins to fill his cock and make him impossibly hard. The emphasis on that one word filled his mind with images of the times he had been on his back with the younger man stretched out between his legs, one hand on his thigh and the other….
Saren swallowed hard through a throat that was constricted and hot with lust. “Yes.” He said simply and ground himself against Nihlus. Thank the spirits for self-lubrication, I won’t hurt him as long as I start slowly.
“Then don’t make me wait Saren.” The younger man’s voice was muffled as he laid his head back on the pillow, one mandible tight to his jaw and the other, the one closest to Saren, opened in a challenging smirk.
He ground his cock against Nihlus’ ass again and rocked his hips forward then back, slipping a little in his own fluid. The younger man rose to meet him, his breath coming a little faster the harder that Saren rubbed between the divot of his rear. He maneuvered a hand under Nihlus’ middle and just lightly skimmed his talons down his side to the hard flare of his hipbone. Saren still needed his other hand to support himself so his ability to caress was limited but he kept up the slow rotations of his hips, thrusting along the divide of warm and supple flesh.
“Saren, please,” He moaned, pushing back to meet him while at the same time trying to stay in contact with the hand that was moving downward.
Saren could already feel the heat coming off Nihlus’ rapidly spreading groin plates. He trailed his fingers lower over that opening and then down under where the youth’s cock would emerge once he was hard. Cautiously, he slid a fingertip into Nihlus’ sheath, just enough to coat his finger with the slippery oils of his sex. The younger man moaned again, louder, because he knew Saren wanted a taste of him but didn’t want to stop what they were already doing.
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He pulled back as he felt the shifting of muscles that heralded Nihlus’ beginning erection and stuck that finger in his mouth to lick clean. Saren nearly told the youth that he loved his flavor but his mouth snapped closed at the last moment. It was too close to the confession he still hadn’t managed to talk himself into making. He settled for lowering his head and giving the back of Nihlus’ neck a playful nip which he then soothed with the tip of his tongue. Saren held back an affectionate hum. He had tried to be more vocal for Nihlus knowing how much the younger man enjoyed that but after years of muffling the more telling harmonics he found it difficult to learn how to express himself that way again.
“I thought,” Nihlus moaned as Saren shoved against his rear a little harder. “I thought you couldn’t be gentle.”
His mandibles fluttered in excitement. “Do you want me to be gentle?” He asked.
“No, no I don’t. I want you to fuck me Saren, just fuck me.”
Lust flared hot as an inferno and spread through his nerves, searing his senses. He was always so careful with Nihlus, always mindful of the other man’s pleasure and comfort rather than his own. Partly because he enjoyed it and partly because he knew Nihlus had expected to be treated as roughly as Saren treated his other lovers. He couldn’t be as brusque with him as he was with Cicero or someone else, they meant nothing to him. Nihlus meant more to Saren than anyone ever had, more than Ieryan and recently, more than Desolas had. Sometimes he was ashamed of that, his brother meant everything to him before he died but Saren understood the love he held and nurtured for Nihlus was an entirely different incarnation.
But if he wanted to know what being truly fucked felt like…
“Lift your hips for me.”
A!A: Two more parts of smut and then the beginning of an actual plot!....I’m only about two and half sections away from this one.
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Glad you're enjoying this.
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Part 3A
Nihlus did as he was instructed immediately, eagerly. Saren grasped the base of his shaft and positioned himself while his free hand spread the younger man open. He took his time pushing past the tight ring of muscle, savoring the way Nihlus’ body resisted at first before giving in to the intrusion. He didn’t stop the forward motion of his hips until he felt his widened plates firmly meet the other man’s ass. Then Saren stilled and took a moment to enjoy being buried in his former student as deeply as he could possibly get. This was his favorite part, when he first entered Nihlus and internal muscles instinctually tried to push him back out, squeezing and rippling around his cock from the tip to the shaft to the base. He bit his tongue out of habit on the sound of pure ecstasy that was fighting its way out of his chest.
Saren didn’t stay that way long, he couldn’t with the way Nihlus was already panting and trembling beneath him. He liked that feeling too.
“Be still.” He said under his breath but still loud enough for Nihlus to hear.
He gave the younger man the barest amount of time to adjust to his size before he pulled back and slid completely out. Nihlus made a noise that sounded deceptively like a whimper and subconsciously lifted his rear in search of Saren. He put a hand in the middle of his’ back and pinned him to the bed then he slammed his cock home hard.
Nihlus yelped. “Fuck! A little warning next time.”
“You said-“
“I know what I said Saren.”
He took a slow, steadying breath. “Do you want me to stop?”
“Hell no. Come on Spectre, fuck me.”
Spirits he loved this man, wanted to tell him as much but again the words lodged in his throat and he couldn’t. He got to his knees between Nihlus’ legs and nudged them further apart until he had them spread as widely as they could go, feet all the way to the sides of the bed. Saren latched his mouth to the back of his lover’s neck. It was reminiscent of the way he’d scruff a turian female if he were taking her from behind and was often referred to as the ‘mating bite’ because it was usually done when she was trying to conceive. Saren just liked the power it gave him over Nihlus’ movements as he held him in place and began a brutal pace. He still managed not to be too rough but his thrusts were harder and faster than he’d ever used with Nihlus.
Saren threw himself toward orgasm, forcing that pressure to build and build with every stroke. He kept the younger man pinned and immobile, kept the hold of teeth at Nihlus’ nape, careful not to pierce the skin. He didn’t intend to last long, the need to fill his lover, to leave his mark inside the younger man as deeply as he could was too strong and nearly overwhelming.
“Saren,”
“Shhh.” He soothed through the mating bite and pet the long spines of Nihlus’ fringe gently even as he slammed his dick in and jerked it back out.
“Please,” Subharmonics all over the place with pleasure, the younger man strained against him, trying to pull his neck free of teeth and attempting to roll his hips.
Saren shoved down on his back and closed his teeth a little tighter before letting go completely, pausing in his fucking. “Be still Nihlus.”
He felt the other man nod and then relax into the mattress. He gave that long fringe another caress and then began to piston into Nihlus with everything he had. In minutes the hot pressure that had been building along his spine and in his groin rushed over him like a wave. Saren grasped both of Nihlus’ hips and jerked the younger man closer, sending his cock deep as he came, filling him with spurt after spurt of hot cum. By the time he was empty, the dark plated turian was shaking in his palms and making small mewling sounds of need, still unsatisfied in that key way.
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Rather than collapse across his lover’s back with his dick still inside, Saren withdrew and flipped Nihlus over so they were facing each other. The pupils of his eyes had overtaken the startling green of the irises, something Saren was sure his own eyes matched. He held that stare for a handful of heartbeats before he shoved their mouths together.
Nihlus wrapped around him with a lustful groan. Pressed front to front, Saren could actually feel the blood surging to Nihlus’ thick erection now that it wasn’t trapped against the bed. He broke their kiss for just a moment.
“Was that what you wanted Castanea?” He asked and licked one mandible with a long swipe of his tongue.
“Part of it.” Nihlus told him breathlessly.
He’d expected it, but suddenly finding himself on his back was still a rush. Nihlus loomed over him with his shoulders hunched like he was waiting for Saren to change his mind and make him stop. When he didn’t, the younger man flashed him a playful grin before ducking his head and going straight for his throat. Saren felt his heart begin to race again and it was only partly due to the way Nihlus’ mouth mapped the contours of his throat and upper chest. The other part was a feeling he’d never been able to shake off, not even when he was with Ieryan. The nervousness he knew tied into his need for complete and utter control of all the aspects of his life, but the fear…The fear confused him. It was not that he had been abused in that manner. The only man to ever top him was the Councilor and he had willingly accepted that: a man of his position simply wasn't fucked by a low-tiered biotic more than twenty years his junior, it just wasn't done. So when Ieryan had lifted his chin to kiss him, Saren gave the unprotected line of his throat without complaint. It was only later as he rested alongside the older man that he realized he’d enjoyed giving himself to another person like that.
But Saren considered Nihlus his equal, that he loved the younger man helped too, and he knew he shouldn’t be so panicky about being underneath him with every intention of letting himself be taken. Saren had taught him how and where to touch him inside shortly after they’d begun sleeping together. Nihlus was always cautious with him and while he took advantage from time to time but he never rushed Saren. In fact, Nihlus was probably one of the most patient bedmates he’d ever had. He hadn’t let the younger man take him fully yet, he wanted to, really he did, but…
They’d gotten close once. Saren had been below him with a thigh hitched over Nihlus’ hip and breathless as the younger man’s cock had started to push into him. Then he’d panicked, his heart racing and his chest unbearably tight with nervous tension. Saren had stopped his lover at the last possible moment, a hand at the base of his dark throat holding him at bay.
“I can’t.” He had whispered and known that Nihlus could hear the severe anxiety in his harmonics. “I can’t.”
Nihlus had been surprisingly understanding and there hadn’t been any disappointment or irritation in his voice when he’d replied. “It’s okay. We don’t need to.”
Saren had never been more grateful to anyone in his life and he’d flipped them over and showed the younger man just how appreciative he was. But in his head, he was greatly confused and frustrated. He’d had no problem letting Ieryan fuck him like that, he’d often delighted in it. But the moment Nihlus rose over him, Saren became anxious and undone, even apprehensive and he panicked. Nihlus didn’t push the issue with him. He stopped whenever Saren needed him to and kept going when he asked.
He’d never had a lover quite like Nihlus before.
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“Saren?”
He shook his head to clear it, a little embarrassed that he’d fallen so easy into memories and mental exposition while Nihlus had been making a trail down his chest with his mouth. “Yes?”
“I feel a bit underappreciated when I’ve got my tongue less than a foot away from your dick and you’re not even paying attention to me.” Mandibles flickered outward to show that he was joking. “I guess I could go find something else to do…”
Saren wrapped his arm around Nihlus’ back and pulled him in close. “What could possibly be more fun than being here with me?”
He shrugged. “There’s gotta be something out there.”
“I sincerely doubt it.”
The younger man huffed and kissed him, sliding his hand up the back of Saren’s head while carefully avoiding the port of his bio-amp. Nihlus had learned his lesson the first time he had hastily grasped at him and hit the little metal nodule a bit too hard. It had hurt significantly and Saren hadn’t been pleased, he had put an end to their activities, leaving them both emotionally strained and horny as hell. Though, the make-up sex had been amazing.
Speaking of amazing, that almost summed up Nihlus’ ability to kiss him senseless. It wasn’t something Saren typically enjoyed, kissing was something mates and companions- people in actual relationships- did and not casual lovers. There were only a few people besides Nihlus and Ieryan that he had included kissing as a part of their seduction. He was clumsy at the act as a result, never bothering to refine his skills. The Councilor hadn’t cared, likely under the impression that Saren’s lack of finesse was because he was so worked up as to lose some of his personal control. The younger Spectre though had figured it out right away, that no one had taught him how to kiss, so Nihlus had. Saren was glad for the lessons, connecting his mouth to the other man’s was exciting and it added a surprising amount of intimacy to their encounters that he didn’t have with his other lovers. It was just another reason to love him.
Saren broke the kiss to moan as he felt Nihlus’ hands moving over his sides toward his hips. Those green eyes held his as one hand slid further down and gently caressed the oversensitive flesh of his still opened plates. Saren shivered despite how warm Nihlus’ palm was, the skin of his fingers was rough and callused.
“Ok?” The younger man asked quietly.
He nodded and, trying to calm the frantic beat of his heart, spread his knees wide enough for Nihlus to move up between them. The other Spectre took the hint, leaning back down to nip and bite along the side of his neck while the hand not cupping his already half hard cock tracked over his thigh. He couldn’t keep his muscles from quivering at the touch. Nihlus noticed and kissed the spot were mandible hinged to his jaw tenderly, humming into his ear. Saren forced himself to relax. The younger man kissed him again, pushed his tongue inside and he was abruptly lost to the press of Nihlus’ body, the weight and heat of him. Saren kissed him back hard and didn’t stop the hand that slid down his back to grope his ass, he even rocked back into it. He pushed that creeping bit of nervousness away, he wanted the other Spectre badly and was willing to let go of that particular control to have him.
Nihlus kept at his mouth, slid their tongues together and let his mandibles flutter freely in obvious delight. The hand on his rear shifted just a bit and Saren felt slender fingertips nudge between the cheeks and over flesh that had only been touched by one other person. He grabbed the back of Nihlus’ head and kissed him even harder, moaning into his mouth as he fought down another brief flare of dread. And the voice in his head that said he was in too vulnerable a position; he’d been able to ignore it for Ieryan, he could do the same for Nihlus.
The younger man pulled back to stare at him. He wouldn’t continue unless Saren told him to.
“Touch me.” He said simply, rolling his hips to emphasize what he meant. Saren wasn’t shy by any means but his self-control was already beginning to slip.
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Another kiss and then Nihlus was easing that finger inside him, slowly and carefully like Saren had taught him to, he’d never been able to stop his muscles from tensing at first. The younger man pecked his mouth lightly with his own and pushed that finger in farther. Saren found that he couldn’t control his breathing or the tremor in his hands as he dug them into the sheets. Bit by bit he began to relax and enjoy Nihlus’ touch and in short order his hips rocked to match the in-out motion of the digit inside him. Then the younger man brushed his prostate and Saren melted into the bed with a soft moan.
Nihlus chuckled warmly, pecked his mouth again. “Feel good?” He asked although he knew exactly how good it felt.
Saren closed his eyes against the spike of pleasure that went straight to his cock when the younger man stroked that spot again and then again harder. He gave himself over to the sensations of heat pooling low while lightning zipped along his nerves and then the younger man distracted him with more kissing. He’d taught Nihlus well it seemed and soon Saren encouraged him to up the ante. The single finger inside him was suddenly two stretching him open. His heart slammed against his ribcage and the heat he’d felt beneath his skin began to cool but Nihlus didn’t give him time to feel uncomfortable. He wrapped his free hand around Saren’s dick and pumped him in time with the thrusts of his fingers, easily triggering that warmth to rebuild in a hurry.
He groaned into the younger man’s mouth and lifted his hips into the contact as Nihlus stroked the sensitive place inside him in tight circles. He abused that spot until Saren was burning with the need to have the other man inside him, not his fingers but his cock. His own pulsed in Nihlus’ grip with every tight caress and he rocked his hips to chase that friction. It seemed to go on forever. By the time Nihlus took his hands away, Saren was shaking with the effort to stay still and not pounce on him. He’d had his fun earlier and now…He liked feeling the other man’s erection resting heavily against his inner thigh and how he was slick with need. He wanted Nihlus above him.
Nihlus kissed along his mandibles and jaw as he made his way down to Saren’s neck, leaving little bites in his wake. When he reached the rapidly thumping pulse he traced patterns on the skin and then bit down. Saren sucked in a breath as he bucked against his former student, caused their cocks to brush and Nihlus to growl into his skin before increasing the pressure from his teeth. Strong hands and slender fingers gripped the back of his thighs and then his lover was pressed firmly to his ass. The head of Nihlus’ dick, thick and overheated, rubbed against Saren’s loosened entrance.
Something like panic bloomed in his chest and burst outward, dousing him in cold fear and he jerked back from Nihlus, putting some distance between their hips. The younger man looked at him in wide-eyed surprise before understanding changed his features and his mandibles pulled tight to his jaw. In moving away Saren had managed to overcome the worst of the panic but the little sliver of irrational fear remained. He took a steadying breath and lifted a hand to pet Nihlus’ fringe and to maybe pull him back down but the other man leaned his head away so that he couldn’t. He thought he saw a glimmer of hurt rejection in those eyes before they glanced away.
Saren let his hand fall. He’d be astonished if Nihlus wasn’t outright angry with him now. How many times is that now? He wondered forlornly. I can’t keep letting him get as far as I do and then making him stop time after time. I would have walked away from a lover that did this to me but Nihlus just keeps trying.
Nihlus didn’t meet his eyes again, staring at a spot on the floor with his mandibles hitched up against his jaw. He was still but for the rise and fall of his chest, the slow in-out of his breath clearly a forced expression of calm. Even in the obvious frustration of being denied release, Saren thought he was painfully beautiful.
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He was suddenly aware of his heartbeat echoing in his head and a different kind of cold spreading from his chest outward. < i>I need to tell him I love him, that I can’t stop myself from panicking, that if we just keep trying eventually I’ll be able to. And I need to tell him now before I've fucked this up and he never wants me to touch him again, before it's too late.
“Nihlus I-“ His throat closed over the words. Tell him damn it. “I’m sorry I-“
The younger man leaned over him and touched their foreplates together with gentle pressure. “You don’t need to explain yourself,” He said, stilling leaning on him. “It means a lot that you’re willing to try and I’m glad you feel you can trust me enough to do so.”
Saren wrapped his hand around the back of Nihlus’ neck to hold that contact. Tell him. Now. “I…” Damn it. “I trust you more than most.”
“I’m glad.” The younger man said simply and slipped out of his hold to stand beside the bed. “I’m…going to shower and work this out myself.”
He’s shutting me out. Saren thought, only recognizing the behavior because it was something he did too. “No.” He said perhaps a little too quickly and with too much force, grabbing Nihlus’ hand. He wasn’t about to let a wall of things left unspoken and unaddressed come up between them like it had with Ieryan. Saren was not going to lose Nihlus because of his stupid fear. “Let me help you.”
One mandible flicked outward and the young man looked at him warily before replying in flat tones. “You don’t have to Saren.”
“I want to.” And he did, he couldn’t let Nihlus remain unsatisfied, not with the way the younger man’s cock jutted eagerly outward and was so slick with desire that Saren was sure he was dripping. It made his mouth water and his body tightened in a pleasant way. Next time I swear I won’t stop him.
Saren tugged his arm until Nihlus sat down and then he climbed off the bed to kneel between his feet. If he couldn’t tell the younger man how he felt without his mouth spontaneously sealing shut, he’d show him instead. The younger man looked down at him and his mouth parted as he breathed in short bursts. He knew exactly what Saren was going to do to him and he was anxious for it to begin. He didn’t have to wait more than a few heartbeats.
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He gave Nihlus a slow lick from opened plating all the way to the tip of his cock, keeping eye contact the entire time. The younger man made a pleased noise and ran the back of one hand over Saren’s left mandible gently. He made his own pleased sound at the touch; Ieryan would have- Stop comparing them. Just stop, focus on Nihlus, forget Ieryan.
Saren took his own advice and pushed his affair with the Councilor far from his mind. While he treated Nihlus to his tongue, he caressed the man’s legs with his fingertips, lingering on the super thin skin behind both his calf spurs and knees. Saren still held his former student’s stare, aware of the rapid increase in his breathing and the tremor that had begun moving through his muscles. He decided he’d teased Nihlus enough and took his cock fully into his mouth, eyes closing as he concentrated on keeping his teeth in check. Above Saren the younger man let out a ragged, dual-toned groan and cupped the back of his head under his fringe to guide his motions.
He took his time working Nihlus into a frenzy, backing off slowly when he thought the younger man was too close to release and then doubling his efforts to return him to that state. In all honesty, Saren was having fun turning his lover into a mess of incoherent words and curses. He was attentive to Nihlus’ every moan and shudder of pleasure and he reveled in being the only man to ever have the youth at his mercy like that. Saren brought him to his edge several times before finally letting him go over it, allowing the younger man to spill down his throat and staying there until the spasms stopped completely. When it was done and he’d licked Nihlus clean, he watched the younger man settle on his back with a satisfied little smirk.
Saren smiled back at him. “Mind if I sleep in here?” He chanced asking. Sharing a bed wasn’t something he’d done a lot of over the years but he’d already made more than a few exceptions for Nihlus….And he wasn’t ready to leave.
“If you want, sure.”
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