The High Cost of Perfection 1.12
anonymous
November 23 2013, 15:17:12 UTC
Miranda forced herself to sit, still reluctant to raise her head. She felt stronger now, but her lap was still on fire and the uncomfortable sensation of the invasion refused to go away. “He told me you will get off before you reach Earth. That’s smart. Until then, we will make sure he will not change his mind. I know we agree on this one, right?” “Yes, right,” Miranda whispered, defeated. She couldn’t fight this any more. She would do and say anything that would get her out of here without more pain. “Good,” she felt the asari tussle her hair. “Appearances need to be kept, though. No hidden signals, no tricks, no secret messages. It will be business as usual with the XO until you disappear.” Liara paused until she got a nod and a mumble from Miranda. “You will receive instructions on your terminal. Remember. I see everything.” “Yes. I understand.” She lifted her head and looked up at Liara. “Can I- can I keep in touch with Oriana?” Liara frowned, like Miranda was an annoying child. “I guess you can. But she will be monitored, too.” “She-she will be safe? You promise?” There was a frustrated sigh, the asari obviously bored with the conversation now. “Yeah, yeah. Get yourself cleaned up and go back to the Normandy.”
Miranda sniffed, wiping her face dry and slowly she stood up on trembling legs. Liara was already in the living room, sitting down before a terminal, pouring herself another glass of wine. Miranda just stared ahead as she limped across the living room, picking up her discarded clothing slowly on the way to the bathroom.
The shower helped a little, at least she looked decent after it, but inside she felt broken. She still felt that… thing inside her, she had to walk carefully and it was an effort to keep all expression from her face. She didn’t dare to let go under the water and make Liara’s victory even greater by throwing up or sobbing in the shower. She just wanted to get out as fast as possible.
----- A/N: End of chapter one. I want the record to show that this time it wasn’t my idea to make Liara into such an evil bitch. It came with the prompt. (Sorry for the strapon technobabble. I needed it to make sense in my mind.) Also, the batarian anatomy idea was lifted from the alien genitalia discussion here: http://masseffectkink.livejournal.com/6066.html?thread=27533490&#t27533490
Off to chapter two after I regain some of my humanity.
Re: The High Cost of Perfection 1.12
anonymous
November 23 2013, 21:37:19 UTC
OP. This is everything I wanted and so much more. I seriously doubt anyone else could have written this any better. I'm very happy that we view Miranda so similarly and your evil bitch Liara is fantastic so far. And I think you shouldn't feel bad, it's not like you are glorifying sexual violence, quite the opposite actually.
There is one thing I don't understand, though. Why didn't you post this on the newest page? Your story is way too good to get lost in the sea of prompts.
Re: The High Cost of Perfection 1.12
anonymous
November 23 2013, 22:34:15 UTC
Wow, thank you, it's always good to hear from the OP.
As for your question, I can answer to almost everything I wrote about, but I have no answer for that one. Never crossed my mind to post it at the last page within the same part. Although that would explain the low rate of comments on this and previous fills. I'm not even sure what's the policy on that (e.g.: if it's considered spamming)
But now that you are here, a caveat: I realized this chapter covers your original prompt. There is the option of writing a few more paragraphs about Miranda disappearing off into the unknown and Liara ending up in Shepard's arms and consoling him while smiling an evil smile into the camera. Then fade to black, end of story.
My question is this: Just out of curiousity, how satisfactory would that be? Wouldn't you wanna know what happens to them next?
Re: The High Cost of Perfection 1.12
anonymous
November 24 2013, 07:52:32 UTC
It wouldn't be very satisfactory, but it seems to be the most logical conclusion if the story would end there, right? I mean, it would be a fitting ending.
But you are right, at this point I'm really curious how you want to continue the story, especially if you throw Jack into the mix and I want to see those scenes from the end that you mentioned.
Also, I read the rules and hints and I can't see why it would be considered spamming, but we'll see.
Re: The High Cost of Perfection 1.12
anonymous
November 24 2013, 09:25:16 UTC
Enjoyed this. Nicely written. Would really like to see more scenes between Liara and Miranda, Also would really like to see more of Liara getting under Miranda's skin, the hair part was a nice touch.
A!A The High Cost of Perfection 1.12
anonymous
November 27 2013, 23:13:56 UTC
Honestly, if I were a reader and the A!A stopped at this point, my head would just explode. I gave it a shot but I just can't stop here. You opened the door, anon, now the storm's a-comin'! :)
The High Cost of Perfection 1.12 rewrite
anonymous
November 27 2013, 23:10:26 UTC
Miranda forced herself to sit, still reluctant to raise her head. She felt stronger now, but her lap was still on fire and the uncomfortable sensation of the invasion refused to go away. “He told me you will get off before you reach Earth. That’s smart. Until then, we will make sure he will not change his mind. I know we agree on this one, right?” “Yes, right,” Miranda whispered, defeated. She couldn’t fight this any more. She would do and say anything that would get her out of here without more pain.
“Good,” she felt the asari tussle her hair. “Appearances need to be kept, though. No hidden signals, no tricks, no secret messages. It will be business as usual with the XO until you disappear.” Liara paused until she got a nod and a mumble from Miranda. “You will receive instructions on your terminal. Remember. I see everything.”
“Yes. I understand.” She lifted her head and looked up at Liara. “Can I go now?” Liara frowned at Miranda like she was an annoying child. “Yes.” She stood there for a few more seconds, trying to decide if her message got through to Miranda, then she left the room.
Miranda sniffed, wiping her face dry and slowly she stood up on trembling legs. Liara was already sitting at her terminal, pouring herself another glass of wine. Miranda just stared ahead as she limped across the living room, picking up her discarded clothing slowly on the way to the bathroom.
The shower helped a little, at least she looked decent after it, but inside she felt broken. She still felt that… thing inside her, she had to walk carefully and it was an effort to keep all expression from her face. She didn’t dare to let go there and make Liara’s victory even greater by throwing up or sobbing in the shower. She just wanted to get out as fast as possible.
She dried herself as best as she could, making herself look decent in a mirror before slowly dressing up and walking out of the bathroom. Liara was barely acknowledging her presence as she crossed to the door, still moving carefully, hugging herself with one arm.
She stopped at the door, lowering her head and let out a soft sigh. Staring at the door panel, she spoke quietly. “I want to keep in touch with Oriana.” There wasn’t as much strength in her voice as she hoped, just a little determination, maybe. Liara scoffed impatiently. “Well, I guess you can. But no tricks. No secret code. If she gets wind and tries to disappear…” she didn’t finish, just waved her hand. “She will be safe?” Liara rolled her eyes. “Yes. Whatever. As long as you stay out of my way.”
Miranda pressed her lips thin and nodded, mostly to herself. She could do that. The way Liara made her ruin her relationship with Shepard, it would be easier. At least she hoped that in time the pain will go away, into the back of her mind, maybe, locked away with all the other bad memories.
----- A/N: Ignore the previous version, I wasn’t happy with the ending, I felt it was rushed, so I reworked it. Now it’s winds down more fluidly and also works better as a closing scene in case you want to stop reading before it gets ugly. Chapter two will come soon.
PS1: I want the record to show that this time it wasn’t my idea to make Liara into such an evil bitch. It came with the prompt.
PS2: Sorry for the strapon technobabble. I needed it to make sense in my mind.
“He told me you will get off before you reach Earth. That’s smart. Until then, we will make sure he will not change his mind. I know we agree on this one, right?”
“Yes, right,” Miranda whispered, defeated. She couldn’t fight this any more. She would do and say anything that would get her out of here without more pain.
“Good,” she felt the asari tussle her hair. “Appearances need to be kept, though. No hidden signals, no tricks, no secret messages. It will be business as usual with the XO until you disappear.” Liara paused until she got a nod and a mumble from Miranda. “You will receive instructions on your terminal. Remember. I see everything.”
“Yes. I understand.” She lifted her head and looked up at Liara. “Can I- can I keep in touch with Oriana?”
Liara frowned, like Miranda was an annoying child.
“I guess you can. But she will be monitored, too.”
“She-she will be safe? You promise?”
There was a frustrated sigh, the asari obviously bored with the conversation now.
“Yeah, yeah. Get yourself cleaned up and go back to the Normandy.”
Miranda sniffed, wiping her face dry and slowly she stood up on trembling legs. Liara was already in the living room, sitting down before a terminal, pouring herself another glass of wine. Miranda just stared ahead as she limped across the living room, picking up her discarded clothing slowly on the way to the bathroom.
The shower helped a little, at least she looked decent after it, but inside she felt broken. She still felt that… thing inside her, she had to walk carefully and it was an effort to keep all expression from her face. She didn’t dare to let go under the water and make Liara’s victory even greater by throwing up or sobbing in the shower. She just wanted to get out as fast as possible.
-----
A/N: End of chapter one. I want the record to show that this time it wasn’t my idea to make Liara into such an evil bitch. It came with the prompt.
(Sorry for the strapon technobabble. I needed it to make sense in my mind.)
Also, the batarian anatomy idea was lifted from the alien genitalia discussion here:
http://masseffectkink.livejournal.com/6066.html?thread=27533490&#t27533490
Off to chapter two after I regain some of my humanity.
Reply
There is one thing I don't understand, though. Why didn't you post this on the newest page? Your story is way too good to get lost in the sea of prompts.
Reply
As for your question, I can answer to almost everything I wrote about, but I have no answer for that one. Never crossed my mind to post it at the last page within the same part. Although that would explain the low rate of comments on this and previous fills. I'm not even sure what's the policy on that (e.g.: if it's considered spamming)
But now that you are here, a caveat:
I realized this chapter covers your original prompt. There is the option of writing a few more paragraphs about Miranda disappearing off into the unknown and Liara ending up in Shepard's arms and consoling him while smiling an evil smile into the camera. Then fade to black, end of story.
My question is this: Just out of curiousity, how satisfactory would that be? Wouldn't you wanna know what happens to them next?
Reply
But you are right, at this point I'm really curious how you want to continue the story, especially if you throw Jack into the mix and I want to see those scenes from the end that you mentioned.
Also, I read the rules and hints and I can't see why it would be considered spamming, but we'll see.
Reply
Reply
Reply
Reply
Reply
Reply
“He told me you will get off before you reach Earth. That’s smart. Until then, we will make sure he will not change his mind. I know we agree on this one, right?”
“Yes, right,” Miranda whispered, defeated. She couldn’t fight this any more. She would do and say anything that would get her out of here without more pain.
“Good,” she felt the asari tussle her hair. “Appearances need to be kept, though. No hidden signals, no tricks, no secret messages. It will be business as usual with the XO until you disappear.” Liara paused until she got a nod and a mumble from Miranda. “You will receive instructions on your terminal. Remember. I see everything.”
“Yes. I understand.” She lifted her head and looked up at Liara. “Can I go now?”
Liara frowned at Miranda like she was an annoying child.
“Yes.” She stood there for a few more seconds, trying to decide if her message got through to Miranda, then she left the room.
Miranda sniffed, wiping her face dry and slowly she stood up on trembling legs. Liara was already sitting at her terminal, pouring herself another glass of wine. Miranda just stared ahead as she limped across the living room, picking up her discarded clothing slowly on the way to the bathroom.
The shower helped a little, at least she looked decent after it, but inside she felt broken. She still felt that… thing inside her, she had to walk carefully and it was an effort to keep all expression from her face. She didn’t dare to let go there and make Liara’s victory even greater by throwing up or sobbing in the shower. She just wanted to get out as fast as possible.
She dried herself as best as she could, making herself look decent in a mirror before slowly dressing up and walking out of the bathroom. Liara was barely acknowledging her presence as she crossed to the door, still moving carefully, hugging herself with one arm.
She stopped at the door, lowering her head and let out a soft sigh. Staring at the door panel, she spoke quietly.
“I want to keep in touch with Oriana.” There wasn’t as much strength in her voice as she hoped, just a little determination, maybe.
Liara scoffed impatiently.
“Well, I guess you can. But no tricks. No secret code. If she gets wind and tries to disappear…” she didn’t finish, just waved her hand.
“She will be safe?”
Liara rolled her eyes. “Yes. Whatever. As long as you stay out of my way.”
Miranda pressed her lips thin and nodded, mostly to herself. She could do that. The way Liara made her ruin her relationship with Shepard, it would be easier. At least she hoped that in time the pain will go away, into the back of her mind, maybe, locked away with all the other bad memories.
-----
A/N: Ignore the previous version, I wasn’t happy with the ending, I felt it was rushed, so I reworked it. Now it’s winds down more fluidly and also works better as a closing scene in case you want to stop reading before it gets ugly. Chapter two will come soon.
PS1: I want the record to show that this time it wasn’t my idea to make Liara into such an evil bitch. It came with the prompt.
PS2: Sorry for the strapon technobabble. I needed it to make sense in my mind.
PS3: The batarian anatomy idea was lifted from the alien genitalia discussion here:
http://masseffectkink.livejournal.com/6066.html?thread=27533490&#t27533490
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http://masseffectkink.livejournal.com/7674.html?thread=36933882#t36933882
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dark thing, but really great writing and I sure will read on if there's more to come.
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