Spring Craving 10/10
anonymous
June 17 2013, 07:47:59 UTC
By the time Garrus is well and over his Seclusion, the apartment looked like the aftermath of a rockstar's bender. They'd put in more holes into the drywall, there were puddles of lube in odd places, there were levo and dextro chocolate smears on the kitchen counter, and the whole place smelled like turian cum.
Incidentally, it wasn't an unpleasant smell, being sweet. Garrus was just never going to hear the end of how Eau de Turian Love Stain was going to be next big perfume hit, if you just add in notes of vanilla and a robust floral like gardenia or jasmine for oomph. Shepard was rolling as she pretended to be a fashionable lady; 'Oh, you like the scent I'm wearing? I know, it's just divine, darling. It's new-new and just too-too! What is it? I'm covered in Turian Love Stain-' 'AAAARGH!'
“I had fun,” Shepard concluded as they walked towards the shuttle that would take them to where the Normandy was waiting for them.
“Good to know,” Garrus deadpanned.
“Seriously. It's fun. And now that I know, we'll plan better for the next times.”
She's looking up at him with such sincerity and openness that Garrus could only stop in the middle of the street, holding onto her shoulder and nudging his forehead into hers and holding still, despite being in public.
“All the next times,” he murmurs. “I promise you'll know beforehand.”
Shepard just gives him a silent, radiant smile, before they walk on.
Re: Spring Craving 10/10
anonymous
June 17 2013, 15:09:00 UTC
Whoa. I was really not sure about this prompt, anon, but I loved: --how they stay themselves and deal with the situation with a sense of humor --how turian culture has obviously adapted and incorporated this biological quirk --Aethyta's help. Good God, everyone needs to have a friend who's an asari matriarch with zero shame.
Re: Spring Craving 10/10
anonymous
June 17 2013, 15:31:45 UTC
Holy. Fuck.
A gallery of my favourite moments:
-"Shepard didn't know what to make of the fact that all the more important turians of certain rank in the Hierarchy now knew that Garrus was out of commission because all he could think about was getting laid."
-“I'm holding a box of sex toys assembled by an asari matriarch, aren't I? This is the best day of my life.”
-"“All right, I'll put it on.” “Yaaaay,” he finally replied. "
-"and then at the bottom of the box, another, smaller box labeled 'For When You Need A Break'. "
-also, "Eau de Turian Love Stain" made me laugh for way longer than it should have ...
oh my gosh, a!a. Thank you so much, this is so amazing. Bookmarked for multiple happy readingtimes!
Re: Spring Craving 10/10
anonymous
June 18 2013, 02:45:39 UTC
I've never laughed my ass off in the middle of a sex scene before, anon, this was fucking BRILLIANT! I totally lost my shit when Garrus started imitating a hanar, that was pure gold. Well done, and a round of applause for a!a. XD
Incidentally, it wasn't an unpleasant smell, being sweet. Garrus was just never going to hear the end of how Eau de Turian Love Stain was going to be next big perfume hit, if you just add in notes of vanilla and a robust floral like gardenia or jasmine for oomph. Shepard was rolling as she pretended to be a fashionable lady; 'Oh, you like the scent I'm wearing? I know, it's just divine, darling. It's new-new and just too-too! What is it? I'm covered in Turian Love Stain-' 'AAAARGH!'
“I had fun,” Shepard concluded as they walked towards the shuttle that would take them to where the Normandy was waiting for them.
“Good to know,” Garrus deadpanned.
“Seriously. It's fun. And now that I know, we'll plan better for the next times.”
She's looking up at him with such sincerity and openness that Garrus could only stop in the middle of the street, holding onto her shoulder and nudging his forehead into hers and holding still, despite being in public.
“All the next times,” he murmurs. “I promise you'll know beforehand.”
Shepard just gives him a silent, radiant smile, before they walk on.
Finis
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--how they stay themselves and deal with the situation with a sense of humor
--how turian culture has obviously adapted and incorporated this biological quirk
--Aethyta's help. Good God, everyone needs to have a friend who's an asari matriarch with zero shame.
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A gallery of my favourite moments:
-"Shepard didn't know what to make of the fact that all the more important turians of certain rank in the Hierarchy now knew that Garrus was out of commission because all he could think about was getting laid."
-“I'm holding a box of sex toys assembled by an asari matriarch, aren't I? This is the best day of my life.”
-"“All right, I'll put it on.”
“Yaaaay,” he finally replied. "
-"and then at the bottom of the box, another, smaller box labeled 'For When You Need A Break'. "
-also, "Eau de Turian Love Stain" made me laugh for way longer than it should have ...
oh my gosh, a!a. Thank you so much, this is so amazing. Bookmarked for multiple happy readingtimes!
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(Smut + comedy) x story subject = Grade AAA Awesomeness
APPROVED
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Also: this was goddamned beautiful. Well-written, good character voices... several parts made me laugh out loud.
If every story here were this well done, I'd never leave the house.
Thank you.
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did i mention that this is incredibly hot
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