Jack, Cupid's Evil Big Sister (1/2)
anonymous
November 14 2012, 19:42:33 UTC
Jack hated owing anyone anything. Personal debts were just more chains, holding her back and slowing her down. Bad enough she owed Shepard for getting her ass thawed out and helping her give those Cerberus jackasses a black eye. She’d be digging out from that one forever. But there were smaller debts she could pay off.
And one she was just about to.
“So what is it you want to talk to me about?” Jacob asked, eyeing her warily. “And why do we have to talk about in one of the lounges?”
“Because, talking to you around all those guns keeps on tempting me to put holes in every Cerberus logo I see,” Jack grunted, slamming a finger into the logo emblazoned on Jacob’s chest. “And Shep would get all pissy if she came down and found you splattered all over the armory.”
“You think you could take me?” Jacob growled.
Just in front of the hatch, she stopped and turned on him. “Fuck yes.” She jabbed him the chest again. “And you want to take it down to the cargo deck and prove it, it’s on. But…” Another stab to the chest. Better to get his blood up. “Shep seems to think we should try talking about our problems. So we’re going to talk, okay pretty boy?”
Jacob tugged his uniform shirt down angrily. She had to admit, he did look good. “Fine.” He waved at the door. “Ladies first.”
“You just want to stare at my ass.”
“What ass, Jack?”
Her lips thinned and she shot him an icy look. Lasted about two seconds before she had to laugh. “Figures. Guys like you, all about the booty.”
The door irised open and she stepped inside. She shot her eyes left. Yup, there was the telltale waver she’d learned to pick out, right there by the viewport. Even before Jacob had entered, the shroud dropped, revealing Kasumi. “So what is it that was so important, that it…”
“Jacob?”
“Kasumi?”
Both turned to her and said almost in unison, “Jack?”
Jack, Cupid's Evil Big Sister (2/2)
anonymous
November 14 2012, 19:43:32 UTC
She grinned. Folding her arms over her chest, she looked at both of them. “Look you two,” she said in her best impersonation of Shepard’s ‘Commander Voice’. “We need the crew in top form. Focused.” Her smile widened. “Gotta get through the distractions.”
“What the hell are you talking about, Jack?” Jacob demanded.
Kasumi just stared at her, eyes narrowing and then suddenly going wide. The thief was the smarter of the two by a few fucking light years.
“Simple. Sexual tension. You two have it and you two are going to resolve it. Bar’s stocked, best sexytime music I could steal from Joker is on the sound system. And you’re not getting out of here until you do.”
“Jack…” Kasumi said warningly.
“What? Are you crazy?” Jacob demanded, chest inflating and shoulders bulging with anger. Maybe she should stay. Referee. Tempting, but no.
She stepped to the door. “Oh, and one last thing?” She thrust her hand out, fingers splayed. It’d be a tricky bit of biotics, but there’d been this whole series of training videos she’d downloaded from the asari. Damn blueskins knew their shit. Worked pretty well earlier, too. Blue energy crackled around her fingers as both Jacob and Kasumi started forward.
She yanked her hand back, closing it in a fist.
Every article of clothing the two were wearing followed.
Jacob, who was everything advertised, stumbled and fell. Kasumi seemed far less concerned about her state of dress and might have even made the hatch if she just hadn’t had to stare at Jacob. Gave her just enough time to step outside and seal the hatch. Two punches and one little barrier and the door was sealed.
“EDI?” Jack said, grinning smugly.
“Yes Jack?”
“No calls in or out of the room.”
“Jacob seems very adamant that I unlock the door. He is also asking for the Commander.”
Jack gathered up the ruined bits of clothing. “Keep it on lockdown. Authorization - Spank me because I’m a dirty, dirty girl.”
“Operative Lawson’s command phrase accepted. However, the Commander is asking what happened.”
“I’ll go explain it to her.” Jack grinned, tossing the shredded clothing over her shoulder. She’d understand. After all, that was going to be great for Jacob and Kasumi’s morale. And since she’d made sure the Commander’d get a copy of the video, it’d be good for hers as well.
Re: Jack, Cupid's Evil Big Sister (2/2)
anonymous
November 14 2012, 22:00:49 UTC
I have to figure that if there's anyone in the Mass Effect canon who has learned biotic stripping (of others at least), it has to be Jack. And this is why we love the crazy lady.
A!A here. I'd like to personally thank you for this prompt. It inspired me. I have another idea or three about Jack, but unfortunately life is insane at the moment. But watch this space.
Re: Jack, Cupid's Evil Big Sister (2/2)
anonymous
November 16 2012, 15:24:08 UTC
:D It seems to fit her, doesn't it? No one would guess she'd use -that- as an override. It'd be like Wrex using 'Happy fluffy bunnies of love and hugging' :D
Re: Jack, Cupid's Evil Big Sister (2/2)
anonymous
November 17 2012, 16:33:45 UTC
Looks like I'm a little late to the party, but I'm the Anon that wrote a comment about Matchmaker Jack and I can't even begin to describe how happy I am right now:) Always wanted to see Jacob and Kasumi end up together. Also, if there's going to be more, all the better!
And one she was just about to.
“So what is it you want to talk to me about?” Jacob asked, eyeing her warily. “And why do we have to talk about in one of the lounges?”
“Because, talking to you around all those guns keeps on tempting me to put holes in every Cerberus logo I see,” Jack grunted, slamming a finger into the logo emblazoned on Jacob’s chest. “And Shep would get all pissy if she came down and found you splattered all over the armory.”
“You think you could take me?” Jacob growled.
Just in front of the hatch, she stopped and turned on him. “Fuck yes.” She jabbed him the chest again. “And you want to take it down to the cargo deck and prove it, it’s on. But…” Another stab to the chest. Better to get his blood up. “Shep seems to think we should try talking about our problems. So we’re going to talk, okay pretty boy?”
Jacob tugged his uniform shirt down angrily. She had to admit, he did look good. “Fine.” He waved at the door. “Ladies first.”
“You just want to stare at my ass.”
“What ass, Jack?”
Her lips thinned and she shot him an icy look. Lasted about two seconds before she had to laugh. “Figures. Guys like you, all about the booty.”
The door irised open and she stepped inside. She shot her eyes left. Yup, there was the telltale waver she’d learned to pick out, right there by the viewport. Even before Jacob had entered, the shroud dropped, revealing Kasumi. “So what is it that was so important, that it…”
“Jacob?”
“Kasumi?”
Both turned to her and said almost in unison, “Jack?”
Reply
“What the hell are you talking about, Jack?” Jacob demanded.
Kasumi just stared at her, eyes narrowing and then suddenly going wide. The thief was the smarter of the two by a few fucking light years.
“Simple. Sexual tension. You two have it and you two are going to resolve it. Bar’s stocked, best sexytime music I could steal from Joker is on the sound system. And you’re not getting out of here until you do.”
“Jack…” Kasumi said warningly.
“What? Are you crazy?” Jacob demanded, chest inflating and shoulders bulging with anger. Maybe she should stay. Referee. Tempting, but no.
She stepped to the door. “Oh, and one last thing?” She thrust her hand out, fingers splayed. It’d be a tricky bit of biotics, but there’d been this whole series of training videos she’d downloaded from the asari. Damn blueskins knew their shit. Worked pretty well earlier, too. Blue energy crackled around her fingers as both Jacob and Kasumi started forward.
She yanked her hand back, closing it in a fist.
Every article of clothing the two were wearing followed.
Jacob, who was everything advertised, stumbled and fell. Kasumi seemed far less concerned about her state of dress and might have even made the hatch if she just hadn’t had to stare at Jacob. Gave her just enough time to step outside and seal the hatch. Two punches and one little barrier and the door was sealed.
“EDI?” Jack said, grinning smugly.
“Yes Jack?”
“No calls in or out of the room.”
“Jacob seems very adamant that I unlock the door. He is also asking for the Commander.”
Jack gathered up the ruined bits of clothing. “Keep it on lockdown. Authorization - Spank me because I’m a dirty, dirty girl.”
“Operative Lawson’s command phrase accepted. However, the Commander is asking what happened.”
“I’ll go explain it to her.” Jack grinned, tossing the shredded clothing over her shoulder. She’d understand. After all, that was going to be great for Jacob and Kasumi’s morale. And since she’d made sure the Commander’d get a copy of the video, it’d be good for hers as well.
Reply
Good stuff, A!A - for the biotic strippings I salute you!
Reply
Glad you enjoyed. :)
Reply
.... poor jacob
Reply
Reply
Reply
Can't. Stop. Lolling.
Reply
Reply
Reply
Reply
Also, if there's going to be more, all the better!
Reply
Leave a comment