“That is enough for today.” Samara rises, movements elegant and controlled, as if she is a dancer. She does not even ask whether or not the meditation had worked: there was no need. Even as Jack pushes herself up off the floor roughly, like a boy after falling over during playtime, she still feels the effects: something familiar and forgotten, long ago. “It is a promising start. I hope you will heed my words well and meditate regularly.”
Jack merely nods. Samara returns it with satisfaction.
“I shall return to my quarters, then.”
Samara makes it to the staircase before Jack finally moves after her.
“I… wait,” Jack requests, her strides containing more urgency than she would like. Samara does so after ascending the first two steps, halting to questioningly look towards Jack.
Thanks, is what Jack wants to say. Thank you.
But those are words she cannot say, not yet, and not to her.
“Some serious shit happened down there, didn’t it?” comes out instead, only because it had been in the back of her mind, and in her own emotional uncertainty, the words come out far more prodding than she wants.
Samara’s gaze hardens.
“I would appreciate it if you did not ask any further questions about this.”
“I… listen, I didn’t mean it like that,” Jack backtracks, nevertheless feeling hurt by the steel in Samara’s tone. For a moment, Jack had believed that Samara had been someone she could have trusted-apparently the asari did not think the same way. “I just… I’m not good with soft shit, okay? I just thought you were… different, just now.”
Jack’s honesty is enough for Samara to consider her, pondering what she is willing to part with.
“I have seen what happens to those that become drunk on power. On hedonism.” There is an edge to Samara’s voice, one that was amplified by the fact that she never talked with anything but serenity.
This is not the direction Jack had expected things to go. It is not the direction that Samara wishes it to go.
But neither can read the others’ mind, and when Samara says “I had hoped to teach you to avoid that fate,” something snaps in Jack. Because the words sound as if it is pity, and there are few things Jack loathes as much as that.
“I get it. I remind you of someone, don’t I? Probably yourself when you were younger, miss perfect?” Jack’s voice rises, the peace in her mind now evaporating.
Something crosses Samara’s features, unreadable. “That my maiden years were turbulent is-”
“Fuck that. I don’t need any of this. I’m myself and none of you are going to change me.”
Samara stares at Jack with that blank expression that is starting to become annoying again.
“Please. We can discuss this another time. I must meditate on today’s events,” Samara finally says, attempting to resolve the conflict.
“Go do that. A bunch of good that bullshit will do you.”
Jack will later convince herself that she meant it and believe it thereafter. But at that moment, it’s nothing more than a slip of tongue, unknowing of its consequences.
Any softness remaining in Samara’s expression fades instantaneously. Again, she is fully in control of all that she is. And likewise, Jack can sense this change and feel her own walls coming back up, shielding the deepest part of her, her already bleeding heart that had been gasping for air for too long now being protected from the hurt that was to come.
“You are a repellant being,” Samara begins.
“Oh ho, here it comes.”
“I had hoped to teach you even some compassion.” Samara sounds flat… disappointed, even. “But now I consider my debt repaid and I can only hope that once our mission reaches a conclusion, we are not fated to meet again.”
Samara levels an icy glare at Jack.
“Though if I see you actively kill an innocent during my remaining time here, you can be assured I will be after you.”
Jack’s fists tighten in response. “Yeah? Why don’t we fucking just get it over with now? Why wait?”
Samara merely stares back at her, the earlier cold fire now devolving into nothing again.
“Nothing to say? Oh, I get it now. Aw, does wittle miss justicar need to go to Shepard for permission?” Jack takes a threatening step forward, her biotics now beginning to flare up dangerously. “Don’t worry. Self-defense has got to be in those rules of yours.”
Even in the face of this danger, Samara merely waits for the fire to burn out of Jack. To any but her, this would be a fruitless, fatal endeavor.
But Samara is confident in herself and in her patience. She has hunted targets by the glow of starlight in the darkness of worlds that no one on the Normandy could imagine. She has chased a Spectre for days, fighting for hours on end and never giving in.
She has hunted her own daughter for over four hundred years.
Samara knows patience.
“Unless you do something that violates the Code, I will treat you as I do any other.” Samara states coldly when she senses Jack’s killing aura wane. Without waiting for Jack to respond, Samara ascends the steps without a look back. “I hope that our conflict does not disrupt our duties.”
“Stay the fuck out. Bitch,” Jack spat, turning and heading back towards her cot. The threat is empty, defensive in its intentions. Break what you can’t have. End it before it ends you.
She does not see Samara pauses near the top of the stairwell, looking as if she is to say something more. But the moment is a fleeting one and Samara fully disappears up the staircase as a shadow in the ocean, transient and fleeting.
Jack doesn’t wait for the echoes of Samara’s steps to disappear before she punches the wall with a ferocity that demanded every fiber of her strength. Samara had been right-she had never been really good at holding back, in battle or otherwise.
But contrary to what even Jack believes, there are no biotics behind the blow. There is nothing left but a soulless ringing and a dull, throbbing pain in her right hand.
Jack stares at the crimson now staining her knuckles and the tattoos around it. And she starts to laugh.
She laughs and laughs and laughs at herself, trying to recall what had made everything fall apart like this and why she had not just blown apart the entire lower deck. But try as she might she can only think of the calm she had always sought after in her grasp only moments ago, how she had crushed it with her own hands like she did with everything, and the passing warmth of Samara’s hand and feels a painful emptiness that is both new and familiar all at once.
~
Moments later and a deck above, an asari stares off into the stars and remembers lullabies and the smallness of her daughters’ hands and how Mirala had been so strong and so damaged too, with the sort of loneliness only a mother could see.
AAUUGH you got me right in the feels, agh, fuck, that last line.
I'd say 'please continue!' but I really like how this capped off. I really dig the feeling that this was actually kind of an impulsive thing for Samara, grasping at something that just went missing, and a total regret for Jack, where she felt something she needed present that was just as quickly snatched away.
AGH in my fucking feels anon why you do this to me.
You should considering writing more Samara by the way. Hooo fuuuuggh i would be there with little blue bells on except not really because that would be tacky
I do it because I love you. I love you so. ACCEPT ALL OF MY LOVE ACCEPT IT
As a writer there are few things more pleasurable than when the reader fully grasps the intent of the work but also for some insane reason enjoys it. So I can only say thank you for taking the time to write out your feelings; I am very humbled that you enjoyed the fic.
Samara is one of my favorite characters and I greatly enjoy writing her. We'll see if there's any future opportunities to do so, either from my own deranged mind or from prompting from the wonder that is the kink.
Thank you again for leaving a review, I appreciate it.
Yeah this fic is basically perfect in every way and full of amazing characterization and dialogue and heartbreaking parallels and oh look my feelings have spilled onto the floor--
This is a good place to end the fic imo, with that suckerpunch of a last sentence.
Aw shuckleberries. Thanks for your flattery, I'll be working hard to keep improving my writing. And thank you so much for telling me what you liked about the fic. and for taking the time to write your thoughts out.
I am glad that your feels are all over the floor because I plan to suck it all up. With a straw. The crazy kind that's twirly and stuff.
That was so good. I love you portrayed samara and jack. I could see them doing just that. It's too bad that one of them couldn't take a step back and say they went over the line. But I can't see them doing that. Very well done a!a.
The problem with Jack and Samara is that they're headstrong (for different reasons) like you said, and so yeah. To me it just seemed like a first-time interaction with the two couldn't go completely well regardless of the type of scenario it is because they're just so... not each other. Which is why I really wanted to fill this one.
Re: ima OP here.
anonymous
August 12 2012, 23:55:23 UTC
My handle on FF.N is Larania Drake.
Honestly, this is fine! I love it! I could never see them getting along quickly or easily, but a mother/daughter relationship could happen over time. They both have a lot of ego to heal. If you want to continue this story, please do. I really enjoyed it. Again, it would take time but that's what a good story does, right? Develop characters. ^_^ Thank you for writing this!
Re: ima OP here.
anonymous
October 28 2013, 05:05:44 UTC
I know there's about zero chance, but I implore you AA to branch off into the original heart-warming concept both because coaxing some kind of happier ending out of Jack and Samara would be heavenly, and because it'd also be such a pleasure to read more of them from your pen. <3.
This is just a lovely mood/character piece, A!A. Heartbreaking in the best way. You've done justice to these two awesome characters who don't get enough love from the fandom. Thanks so much for sharing.
This is so intelligent, beautiful, and bittersweet, especially the last two paragraphs. You captured their two characters and how they might bond (and why that bond might fail) so well. I was surprised to be so moved by this, but I was. Great job, anon.
Jack merely nods. Samara returns it with satisfaction.
“I shall return to my quarters, then.”
Samara makes it to the staircase before Jack finally moves after her.
“I… wait,” Jack requests, her strides containing more urgency than she would like. Samara does so after ascending the first two steps, halting to questioningly look towards Jack.
Thanks, is what Jack wants to say. Thank you.
But those are words she cannot say, not yet, and not to her.
“Some serious shit happened down there, didn’t it?” comes out instead, only because it had been in the back of her mind, and in her own emotional uncertainty, the words come out far more prodding than she wants.
Samara’s gaze hardens.
“I would appreciate it if you did not ask any further questions about this.”
“I… listen, I didn’t mean it like that,” Jack backtracks, nevertheless feeling hurt by the steel in Samara’s tone. For a moment, Jack had believed that Samara had been someone she could have trusted-apparently the asari did not think the same way. “I just… I’m not good with soft shit, okay? I just thought you were… different, just now.”
Jack’s honesty is enough for Samara to consider her, pondering what she is willing to part with.
“I have seen what happens to those that become drunk on power. On hedonism.” There is an edge to Samara’s voice, one that was amplified by the fact that she never talked with anything but serenity.
This is not the direction Jack had expected things to go. It is not the direction that Samara wishes it to go.
But neither can read the others’ mind, and when Samara says “I had hoped to teach you to avoid that fate,” something snaps in Jack. Because the words sound as if it is pity, and there are few things Jack loathes as much as that.
“I get it. I remind you of someone, don’t I? Probably yourself when you were younger, miss perfect?” Jack’s voice rises, the peace in her mind now evaporating.
Something crosses Samara’s features, unreadable. “That my maiden years were turbulent is-”
“Fuck that. I don’t need any of this. I’m myself and none of you are going to change me.”
Samara stares at Jack with that blank expression that is starting to become annoying again.
“Please. We can discuss this another time. I must meditate on today’s events,” Samara finally says, attempting to resolve the conflict.
“Go do that. A bunch of good that bullshit will do you.”
Jack will later convince herself that she meant it and believe it thereafter. But at that moment, it’s nothing more than a slip of tongue, unknowing of its consequences.
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“You are a repellant being,” Samara begins.
“Oh ho, here it comes.”
“I had hoped to teach you even some compassion.” Samara sounds flat… disappointed, even. “But now I consider my debt repaid and I can only hope that once our mission reaches a conclusion, we are not fated to meet again.”
Samara levels an icy glare at Jack.
“Though if I see you actively kill an innocent during my remaining time here, you can be assured I will be after you.”
Jack’s fists tighten in response. “Yeah? Why don’t we fucking just get it over with now? Why wait?”
Samara merely stares back at her, the earlier cold fire now devolving into nothing again.
“Nothing to say? Oh, I get it now. Aw, does wittle miss justicar need to go to Shepard for permission?” Jack takes a threatening step forward, her biotics now beginning to flare up dangerously. “Don’t worry. Self-defense has got to be in those rules of yours.”
Even in the face of this danger, Samara merely waits for the fire to burn out of Jack. To any but her, this would be a fruitless, fatal endeavor.
But Samara is confident in herself and in her patience. She has hunted targets by the glow of starlight in the darkness of worlds that no one on the Normandy could imagine. She has chased a Spectre for days, fighting for hours on end and never giving in.
She has hunted her own daughter for over four hundred years.
Samara knows patience.
“Unless you do something that violates the Code, I will treat you as I do any other.” Samara states coldly when she senses Jack’s killing aura wane. Without waiting for Jack to respond, Samara ascends the steps without a look back. “I hope that our conflict does not disrupt our duties.”
“Stay the fuck out. Bitch,” Jack spat, turning and heading back towards her cot. The threat is empty, defensive in its intentions. Break what you can’t have. End it before it ends you.
She does not see Samara pauses near the top of the stairwell, looking as if she is to say something more. But the moment is a fleeting one and Samara fully disappears up the staircase as a shadow in the ocean, transient and fleeting.
Jack doesn’t wait for the echoes of Samara’s steps to disappear before she punches the wall with a ferocity that demanded every fiber of her strength. Samara had been right-she had never been really good at holding back, in battle or otherwise.
But contrary to what even Jack believes, there are no biotics behind the blow. There is nothing left but a soulless ringing and a dull, throbbing pain in her right hand.
Jack stares at the crimson now staining her knuckles and the tattoos around it. And she starts to laugh.
She laughs and laughs and laughs at herself, trying to recall what had made everything fall apart like this and why she had not just blown apart the entire lower deck. But try as she might she can only think of the calm she had always sought after in her grasp only moments ago, how she had crushed it with her own hands like she did with everything, and the passing warmth of Samara’s hand and feels a painful emptiness that is both new and familiar all at once.
~
Moments later and a deck above, an asari stares off into the stars and remembers lullabies and the smallness of her daughters’ hands and how Mirala had been so strong and so damaged too, with the sort of loneliness only a mother could see.
-End-
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AAUUGH you got me right in the feels, agh, fuck, that last line.
I'd say 'please continue!' but I really like how this capped off. I really dig the feeling that this was actually kind of an impulsive thing for Samara, grasping at something that just went missing, and a total regret for Jack, where she felt something she needed present that was just as quickly snatched away.
AGH in my fucking feels anon why you do this to me.
You should considering writing more Samara by the way. Hooo fuuuuggh i would be there with little blue bells on except not really because that would be tacky
...
no i'm serious though you should get on that.
Reply
I do it because I love you. I love you so. ACCEPT ALL OF MY LOVE ACCEPT IT
As a writer there are few things more pleasurable than when the reader fully grasps the intent of the work but also for some insane reason enjoys it. So I can only say thank you for taking the time to write out your feelings; I am very humbled that you enjoyed the fic.
Samara is one of my favorite characters and I greatly enjoy writing her. We'll see if there's any future opportunities to do so, either from my own deranged mind or from prompting from the wonder that is the kink.
Thank you again for leaving a review, I appreciate it.
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Thank you for reviewing the work, I am really glad that it spoke to you in some way.
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This is a good place to end the fic imo, with that suckerpunch of a last sentence.
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Aw shuckleberries. Thanks for your flattery, I'll be working hard to keep improving my writing. And thank you so much for telling me what you liked about the fic. and for taking the time to write your thoughts out.
I am glad that your feels are all over the floor because I plan to suck it all up. With a straw. The crazy kind that's twirly and stuff.
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Much love for writing a response.
The problem with Jack and Samara is that they're headstrong (for different reasons) like you said, and so yeah. To me it just seemed like a first-time interaction with the two couldn't go completely well regardless of the type of scenario it is because they're just so... not each other. Which is why I really wanted to fill this one.
Thank you again for leaving your thoughts.
Reply
Honestly, this is fine! I love it! I could never see them getting along quickly or easily, but a mother/daughter relationship could happen over time. They both have a lot of ego to heal. If you want to continue this story, please do. I really enjoyed it. Again, it would take time but that's what a good story does, right? Develop characters. ^_^ Thank you for writing this!
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Thank you so very much for the wonderful idea! I was really happy to fill this; the prompt had a lot of depth I thought.
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<3.
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