Fic(let): Love like lightsabers

[maskedfangirl]

I just finished my work for class, and this is the first thing I did with my newfound free time.

AND I'M NOT SORRY.

Title: Love like lightsabers
Characters: Castiel/Zachariah's hot cousin angel, Dean, Sam
Ratings/Warnings: PG-13 unless you're a glowing ball of light, then NC-17.
Word Count: 500
Summary: A very scientific examination of how

Comments

Worst Double Date Ever

[22by7]

'You need not belittle Dean's intelligence simply because he did not have many opportunities to read, owing to his demanding lifestyle,' said Castiel, smouldering across the table at Gabriel. The more he smouldered, the more Gabriel smiled that utterly infuriating smile.

'Don't rise to it, Cas,' said Dean. 'It's gonna take the little bastard a lot more to insult me,' He dug his fork into his slice of pie with naked violence.

'Dean, Gabriel isn't-' started Sam, sighing into his salad greens, but Gabriel leaned up - no mean feat - to whisper something into his ear. A sprig of broccoli fell onto his plate.

Sam stared at Castiel in horror.

'You didn't,' said Sam softly.

'Didn't what?' said Castiel, who'd gotten bored of the staring match with his older brother and was now staring at Dean's crotch intently instead.

'Gabriel says that you... that you burned down the Great Library of Alexandria. Cas, you didn't - you didn't actually do that. Did you?'

'Thfh fmmfuhg?' said Dean, around a mouthful of apocalypse-defying gooseberry pie, wondering why the inseam of his jeans was suddenly warm.

'It certainly wasn't the Romans or the Christians or the Muslims,' said Gabriel in an acceptable parody of Castiel's deadpan voice. 'Baby bro was curious about certain aspects of humanity and snuck himself into the library after closing time. Right, baby bro?'

'I have ever admired the works of art created by humans,' said Castiel, looking like he meant to burrow inside Dean's pants and hide there forever, which ... was probably exactly what he wanted, yeah.

'100,000 scrolls' worth of erotica in a single day. Don't worry, baby bro,' said Gabriel, 'It'd make any guy fire the old hand cannon.'

'It was an accident,' said Castiel with great dignity.

It was impossible to tell if Sam was going to vomit, cry or tear Castiel's eyes out with his teeth.

'Duuude,' said Dean, turning to face Castiel. 'Lemme get this straight. You popped down to Earth to jerk off to ancient Roman porn? Oh man, that shit must've been so freaky. C'mon, spill.'

Castiel blushed delicately. 'Perhaps later, Dean. In private.' Gabriel made obscene gagging noises.

Sam suddenly flung a wad of paper napkins down on the table and stood up. 'This is... I... You're a dick, and a criminal. I hate you.' Then he ran away, followed by Gabriel, who rolled his eyes and vanished.

'I am very sorry, but Gabriel will not doubt comfort your brother,' said Castiel, squeezing Dean's crotch under the table. Dean shuddered.

'Yeah, I kinda don't want those images, Cas.' He pushed his hips forward and grinned. 'Let's get outta here, I think I'm in the mood for some history lessons.'

Re: Worst Double Date Ever

[maskedfangirl]

OMG ILU. This made me laugh so hard!

You get a slow clap.

Re: Worst Double Date Ever

[22by7]

Are you trying to give me gonorrhea OVER THE INTERNETS? I'm totally feeling the love here xD

Re: Worst Double Date Ever

[maskedfangirl]

I give you love! (The burning sensation is the love working.)