My new story.
I wrote this Sunday night. Comment.
The Ways of Her
Lora thought herself different because, for most of her life, it was her way or no way. Perhaps, this was the reason why at times in life, she felt she failed more than she accomplished. Somehow, that didn’t matter as much these days. Slowly, but surely and steadily, she felt her life slip away into nothingness; into something she could find no control over. Maybe that was the worst part.
She was thirty-two and too damn tired. Too tired of working for a boss who fucked his secretary while his wife was making dinner and taking care of their kids. Too tired of waiting for something magical to happen in her life - anything! No. Not for Lora. She was too tired of being nagged on: the small force of nature that her mother was, lately was becoming more of a full-scale natural disaster.
“Lora, your sister has gotten married twice, and the rock on her finger now is two and a half carats bigger. Now if you ask me, she’s made the right decision. Honey, Allison is three years younger than you and she’s living the life! I just think it’s time for you to settle down, sweetie.”
How was it, that a mother could say all this to her own daughter? Were all mothers this way? Sometimes, it felt to Lora like she was part of a computer program, repeatedly receiving hit after hit by a dangerously ignorant virus. Often lately, the ignorant virus kept hitting her in the same spot: the one where a ring would usually go on her left hand.
Now, when Lora only comes home for the holidays, Kitty will call her two weeks in advance to remind her of the joys of seeing her family during these times. And today, Lora will politely but firmly try and bail out of the situation. The only thing that changes today - the variable - is her excuse.
“Mom, I can’t pay for the flight.”
“Lora, you know I’m paying. I always do.”
“Mom…”
“Lovey, if you are trying to tell me there’s a man, do so now. Otherwise, you are to bring that 1974 merlot your father always loved so much.” There is a long pause, and sighing half-disappointedly and half-triumphantly, Kitty speaks into her new phone receiver, “I’ll see you at home in two weeks, doll.”
And as she hangs up, Lora opens the bottle of 1974 merlot she’s been saving for the holidays with her family, and takes a good swig. She is too tired, and the wine is the only thing that gets her to sleep.
What happened to her future? She was supposed to get married to a loving husband, have all the financial security in the world, send her kids to private school, travel all over Europe and live in a gorgeous house in England! Instead, she ended up going to college for a degree in Architecture and became a marketing representative - with no loving husband, not even a pet (let alone kids), the farthest she’s traveled was to Montreal, Canada (and she didn’t speak a word in French)… And after all this, she sits drinking the 1974 merlot in a not-so-lovely apartment in Savannah, Georgia.
Where the hell did life go? More than anything, Lora resented herself for even thinking that just maybe this once, her mother is right and she is wrong. It certainly didn’t seem possible that there was a decent man in the whole of this God-forsaken town; she’s made it her business to double check every single guy she’s met at a bar and Savannah was currently overpopulated with assholes.
Half-way through the bottle, she checks the time on the kitchen wall above the stove range, and seeing as it is 11:47 pm and she has to go work for the boss she hates tomorrow - she decides it must be time for ‘The David Letterman Show’; or she wouldn’t feel like instead of blood, she has alcohol running through her veins and arteries.
Settling down on the couch with several blankets and pillows, she thinks to herself that it was, yet again, pointless to try and stay away from her family this year. No matter how depressing the holidays have become - she will have to go to Frank’s Liquor tomorrow and buy a new bottle of the 1974, and she will have to catch the flight to Hartford - Monday night two weeks from today.
And when the clock reads 11:59 pm - in her sleepy, drunken state, Lora thinks to herself that this is as sober as she’ll ever be after half a bottle of wine and… She thinks that she doesn’t care about having a four-carat diamond on her finger and being married to bank-investor-Mark, or Fred or whatever the hell his name was, that husband of Allison’s… He was probably fucking his secretary too, anyway.
‘Poor Ally, I pity you.’ Lora thought. And she felt mean. Older sisters weren’t supposed to be so inconsiderate. It wasn’t her business. So she got up, and drank another glass of wine. David Letterman never had good shows anymore.
She was just so tired, and the wine was the only thing that got her to sleep these days. Maybe tomorrow, she will meet a lovely stranger who will ask her name. Maybe they will randomly see each other again and he will ask to buy her hot chocolate. With extra whipped-cream on top. Maybe later, he will send her a bouquet of purple tulips and Godiva chocolates. And somehow he will love her for the person she always was. Maybe then, she will marry him and he will take her far, far away… From this life she did not know how to live anymore.
The Ways of Her
Lora thought herself different because, for most of her life, it was her way or no way. Perhaps, this was the reason why at times in life, she felt she failed more than she accomplished. Somehow, that didn’t matter as much these days. Slowly, but surely and steadily, she felt her life slip away into nothingness; into something she could find no control over. Maybe that was the worst part.
She was thirty-two and too damn tired. Too tired of working for a boss who fucked his secretary while his wife was making dinner and taking care of their kids. Too tired of waiting for something magical to happen in her life - anything! No. Not for Lora. She was too tired of being nagged on: the small force of nature that her mother was, lately was becoming more of a full-scale natural disaster.
“Lora, your sister has gotten married twice, and the rock on her finger now is two and a half carats bigger. Now if you ask me, she’s made the right decision. Honey, Allison is three years younger than you and she’s living the life! I just think it’s time for you to settle down, sweetie.”
How was it, that a mother could say all this to her own daughter? Were all mothers this way? Sometimes, it felt to Lora like she was part of a computer program, repeatedly receiving hit after hit by a dangerously ignorant virus. Often lately, the ignorant virus kept hitting her in the same spot: the one where a ring would usually go on her left hand.
Now, when Lora only comes home for the holidays, Kitty will call her two weeks in advance to remind her of the joys of seeing her family during these times. And today, Lora will politely but firmly try and bail out of the situation. The only thing that changes today - the variable - is her excuse.
“Mom, I can’t pay for the flight.”
“Lora, you know I’m paying. I always do.”
“Mom…”
“Lovey, if you are trying to tell me there’s a man, do so now. Otherwise, you are to bring that 1974 merlot your father always loved so much.” There is a long pause, and sighing half-disappointedly and half-triumphantly, Kitty speaks into her new phone receiver, “I’ll see you at home in two weeks, doll.”
And as she hangs up, Lora opens the bottle of 1974 merlot she’s been saving for the holidays with her family, and takes a good swig. She is too tired, and the wine is the only thing that gets her to sleep.
What happened to her future? She was supposed to get married to a loving husband, have all the financial security in the world, send her kids to private school, travel all over Europe and live in a gorgeous house in England! Instead, she ended up going to college for a degree in Architecture and became a marketing representative - with no loving husband, not even a pet (let alone kids), the farthest she’s traveled was to Montreal, Canada (and she didn’t speak a word in French)… And after all this, she sits drinking the 1974 merlot in a not-so-lovely apartment in Savannah, Georgia.
Where the hell did life go? More than anything, Lora resented herself for even thinking that just maybe this once, her mother is right and she is wrong. It certainly didn’t seem possible that there was a decent man in the whole of this God-forsaken town; she’s made it her business to double check every single guy she’s met at a bar and Savannah was currently overpopulated with assholes.
Half-way through the bottle, she checks the time on the kitchen wall above the stove range, and seeing as it is 11:47 pm and she has to go work for the boss she hates tomorrow - she decides it must be time for ‘The David Letterman Show’; or she wouldn’t feel like instead of blood, she has alcohol running through her veins and arteries.
Settling down on the couch with several blankets and pillows, she thinks to herself that it was, yet again, pointless to try and stay away from her family this year. No matter how depressing the holidays have become - she will have to go to Frank’s Liquor tomorrow and buy a new bottle of the 1974, and she will have to catch the flight to Hartford - Monday night two weeks from today.
And when the clock reads 11:59 pm - in her sleepy, drunken state, Lora thinks to herself that this is as sober as she’ll ever be after half a bottle of wine and… She thinks that she doesn’t care about having a four-carat diamond on her finger and being married to bank-investor-Mark, or Fred or whatever the hell his name was, that husband of Allison’s… He was probably fucking his secretary too, anyway.
‘Poor Ally, I pity you.’ Lora thought. And she felt mean. Older sisters weren’t supposed to be so inconsiderate. It wasn’t her business. So she got up, and drank another glass of wine. David Letterman never had good shows anymore.
She was just so tired, and the wine was the only thing that got her to sleep these days. Maybe tomorrow, she will meet a lovely stranger who will ask her name. Maybe they will randomly see each other again and he will ask to buy her hot chocolate. With extra whipped-cream on top. Maybe later, he will send her a bouquet of purple tulips and Godiva chocolates. And somehow he will love her for the person she always was. Maybe then, she will marry him and he will take her far, far away… From this life she did not know how to live anymore.