this song is fucking sad
Across Five Aprils - A Year From Now
Complete and total adoration,
My gift to you, my heart was yours,
In ten weeks you shaped it,
In one night you murdered it.
Torn from my chest and laid at your feet,
That first step that you took was the worst.
Since then you've walked a thousand miles in solace and short remark,
And I still have these memories
But will never see what we could have been.
Remember when we talked about where we'd be a year from now?
Remember when you held my hand like you'd never let it go?
Remember, Cause that's all you can do.
We'll never make another memory,
We'll never make another memory.
I wish i would have died in your arms the last time we were together,
So I wouldn't have to wake without you today.
This time I thought things were real,
You said they were,
What happened?
You were a priority,
Was I an option?
I let you see a side of me that I don't share with anyone.
Promises are just words unless they are fulfilled.
Knew from the beginning all I had to offer you was my heart,
I'm just sorry that it wasn't enough.
So, we'll go our own ways,
And hopefully you'll remember these things i've told you,
Hopefully you'll understand that everything I said is in sincerity.
A broken heart is not what I wanted from this,
But I guess I've learned from it.
But aren't you supposed to learn from your mistakes?
I don't consider this a mistake,
I just wish the story didn't end this way.
Because I'm still in love with the person who helped me write it.
I just read those today and oh my i cried so much. I dont know why i am sad. I am happy. But today is just one of those days where just one little thing is bound to make you cry. Talking to louise today i was fighting back tears. I just cant believe how suddenly EVERYTHING has changed. Its worse because im not at work. But i dont know. horrible memories. My head makes me more insane than usual.. i woke up this morning thinking i still had a boyfriend.. all because of a dream. But then it flooded back in a instant. i told louise that it made me sad. She said that i should have felt relieved, and she is right in a way. This feeling of sadness isnt reciprocated. Its just mocked.