Hell has Broken Loose

[mascara_bleeds]

Grawr* My life sucks so bad right now. The worse part is that everything that is going on, I have done to myself. It took me a while to "step outside the box" and realize what the fuck I was doing to myself and to everyone around me. Unfortunately I realized too late. I've lost someone I really, really, really care about and I've lost my parents' trust. Not to mention that I don't know how to break the ice between myself and my dad's family. I'm so alone and so lost right now...I hate it. I guess this is what my mom means when she says that no one is really your friend. There is no one you could really go to. I need to get out. I need to move on. I need to forget about things and try to start over...blank slate. I need to get over Jonny...I need to stop crying about him everyday. I don't think happiness is hard to grasp..I'll make sure my life is simple from now on. I don't want to complicate things for myself and for other people anymore. I want to go out and have fun and be happy without breaking rules, without getting grounded, without breaking someone's heart. That is exactly what I'm going to do. Wish me luck.

**I will love you forever, Jonny**
**I hope you can forgive me**